Serena wished Darien had spoken of love while he held her instead of his want and need of her. He must have once felt love for her, if not something close to that emotion to have been that fierce in his desire. But then, men were different from women in that aspect, right? Should she be satisfied with it? Should that be enough for her? Was it all right to hope that whatever Darien felt for her would grow into a deeper, more tender emotion?
He held her tight against him until sleep started to claim her, the warmth of his body lulling her into oblivion and thawing the ice that she thought had frozen her heart.
She squeezed her eyes shut upon feeling his lips on her hair, his strong arms around her waist. Some time in the night she woke to find out that she had turned in her sleep to face him and bury her head against his muscular chest.
He was still holding her, deep in slumber. She closed her eyes again and seemed to hear him whisper her name.
Did she really want to escape him?
He was the only one who could make her feel alive. And it felt so right.
When she woke up again, it was almost ten in the morning and Darien was no longer beside her. But there was a certain contentment in her heart that seemed to overflow. She was really happy for the first time in years.
Because I love him.
Had Darien left for the office?
His car was still in the garage when she checked.
Perhaps if she could show him that she was more mature, be more understanding about the demands of his work, be less jealous... Maybe she... they could make it work this time? Would she be able to win his love? Why did he want her back? If it was only desire, no relationship could survive on that alone. What would happen when he no longer wanted her?
She went into the kitchen to prepare some coffee, and noticed that the one in the percolator was still hot. She smiled until she tasted the dark stuff.
That man and his coffee...
She opened the refrigerator to get some half and half-one of the regular freebies from Lita-when somebody knocked on the kitchen door. She closed the refrigerator door, grimacing that there was nothing in there except milk and cream. This last week, she'd been living on coffee and cafeteria meals at the hospital, and didn't bother to cook. When she remembered to eat, at least.
Could it be Darien at the door? Would it be wishful thinking that he went to the nearest grocery store or bakery? Why didn't he just bring his own keys? He could have borrowed them again even if he did return them to her the night before.
She opened the door and was greeted by Molly. She was with her husband. And Alain.
Her eyes must have widened, but Molly seemed oblivious to her surprise.
"I wasn't sure you'd still be here-you know, I thought you'd be at the hospital by now. I-we dropped by, told Marvin we should bring you some breakfast. I prepared some pancakes and sandwiches," she babbled.
Her friend was nervous, Serena could tell. "Uhm, thank you, Molly. You shouldn't have bothered. But I appreciate it." She took the ungainly basket from her friend and put in on the table, inviting the visitors into the kitchen.
"Is that your husband's car outside?" Alain asked.
"Where are your teacups, Serena? I brought a thermos of pure Ceylon green tea, Sencha as Mina proudly told me when she gifted me two boxes from her modeling stint in Sri Lanka. If you ask me, she bought that in England when she visited her grandmother." Molly was opening cupboards as she chattered.
I have nothing to feel guilty about! Why is Molly acting this way?
"Yes, Alain. It's Darien's car. Please sit down and I'll prepare some fresh coffee if you don't care for tea." She turned on her back to face the coffee maker, and tightened the sash of the robe she was wearing.
She didn't bother making more coffee. She hated the thought of wasting what's left in the container. They should just "make do" with that premium tea.
She was about to get some plates for the pancakes when someone seized her by the shoulders, turning her around.
Serena didn't know if it was her or Molly who gasped.
Alain Ledger's green eyes scanned her face, and her body, as if searching for something that he couldn't or didn't want to name. 'What is he doing here?'
He was concerned, that much she was sure. "What's wrong?" she asked. She broke free of his hold and made a move to get some plates and forks.
'You weren't answering my calls last night,' Alain said.
'I already told him you're all right. I assured him of that last night when he wanted to come over, it was so late. I told him that your phone is old and the battery would die on you in the most opportune moments-"
"Shut up, Molly," Alain barked without looking at her.
"Well, excuse me!"
'I'm really sorry if you were worried, Alain. And thank you for coming here with Molly and Marvin." Molly, if not the couple, was a constant visitor. It was the first time Alain called this early.
"I was surprised when he passed us on the street on our way here today. We all arrived in his car," Molly said, now sitting on the table and setting place mats for them all. She poured tea for her husband. "Sit down, Alain, and have some tea. Let Serena serve us some pancakes before they turn cold and soggy."
"I'm really sorry for worrying you all unnecessarily,' Serena said sincerely.
'You're okay. That's all that matters,' Molly said and walked to her, getting the plates and forks from her hands to set them on the table. "I forgot to ask you, are you able to get the money for the down payment for your father's treatment? That's another reason why we're here. Marvin was able to contact a real estate broker. He's a friend of his from law school, but he failed his exams and decided to concentrate on selling properties.'
'Was Darien here since last night?' Alain persisted.
Serena lifted her eyes to Alain, then shifted them to Molly, and sighed. She was not ready to explain yet. Alain gripped her arm and she looked at him again.
Surely, she didn't owe him an explanation?
He was acting like a possessive boyfriend and she didn't like it. Serena moved away from him, releasing herself from his hold.
'Was your husband here last night, Serena?' he repeated, his tone darker.
She felt herself blush. 'Yes. I called him.'
Molly looked surprised, but she simply shrugged as she looked at her husband.
'I was sure he would help me. He was the only one I could think of.'
'You can't be serious!' Alain sneered.
"He offered his help before," she reasoned, more to herself than to anyone else in the room. "I needed to do it.'
"He's not as cold as I thought,' was Molly's remark. She seemed placated by the gesture, but her voice said, 'He needs to do more by you. Helping your father is not enough.'
She could tell them that she was going back to Darien. It would make this all simpler, easier.
'You called him on the phone. You didn't have to invite him here!' Alain almost thundered.
He was beginning to irritate her. "I didn't invite him here!"
'You expect me to believe that you played video games all night?' Alain gripped her arms and shook her.
"Alain!" Molly interjected. "Let go of her!"
'I think what my husband and I did is none of your business!' Serena snapped.
"Release my wife." All eyes turned to the direction of the order. Darien was standing in the doorway to the kitchen from the living room.
He put down the paper bag of what Serena believed as groceries on the near console table. He must have been holding it for the whole duration of the verbal exchange. They must have been too absorbed to notice his presence. And he always did have that spy-quality to observe people while appearing to be invisible.
His amused gaze took in their startled glances.
He laughed and moved forward to join them. He was now standing a foot away from Serena, who in her effort to escape Alain's grasp, was standing with her back to the utensil drawer.
'I was really curious how you were going to answer that question, Serena.'
'What are you doing here, Darien?' Alain demanded.
Darien only arched an eyebrow at Alain's insolent tone. 'You're right, Alain. My wife and I, we didn't play bedroom chess all night. We had more important things to do.'
Serena's cheeks burned as she glared at Darien.
Alain looked livid when he turned to face Serena. 'Did you fuck him? Did you fuck your husband to get money from him? And I always thought you were so pure! You're just another slut.'
Molly's eyes went wide as her jaw dropped.
The next instant, Alain was on the ground, his lower lip bleeding, Darien on top of him his fist still in contact with the other man's face.
'If you want to leave this house with your teeth intact and your legs not broken, you'd better apologize to my wife,' Darien said savagely.
Serena wasn't sure if she'd have hit Alain if he were nearer. She didn't want to move any closer to him. But seeing Darien's furious reaction, all rage left her.
"Darien, please!" She embraced him from the back and did her best to lift him away from Alain. "Stop it."
For a man who always seemed to be in control, Serena was disturbed by this attack from him. He rose on his feet and ran his fingers through his hair, as if giving them something to do to keep them from inflicting violence on someone or something.
Marvin got up from the chair to help Alain get to his feet.
Serena flinched and automatically moved away when Alain suddenly faced her and lifted his hand as if to touch her face. A look from her husband and Alain dropped his hand.
'If you'd only told me that you're that desperate...' Alain said. 'Damn you, Serena, I wanted to marry you!'
'She is still married to me, Ledger,' Darien said. "I'll never make it that easy."
Alain scoffed. His green eyes were filled with pain when he looked at her. 'I'm sorry for I what I said, Serena,' he said remorsefully. 'I'm hurt for losing the woman I love and I wanted to hurt back. You didn't deserve what I said. I knew you only did it for your dad.'
And that must be the most insulting thing that anyone could have said to Darien.
'Don't worry about it, Alain. I consider it forgotten,' Serena said.
'I'm truly sorry, Serena. I hope you know I'll always be there if you ever need me,' he said sadly before turning on his heel. He went out using the kitchen door that led to the garden.
Molly walked toward Serena, her eyes noticing the grim look on Darien's face. Serena wanted to smile, but she was afraid tears would fall instead.
'I... we'd better go.' Molly hugged her. 'Be sure to have some breakfast.'
'I will,' Serena promised.
Then she and Darien were left alone. Darien reached for the coffee pot.
"The coffee must be cold," Serena remarked.
Darien turned to look at her. 'No wonder Ledger guessed. You look so guilty for sleeping with your husband,' he said mockingly.
'I thought you provoked him that's why he guessed.' She wished she did feel guilty for sleeping with him. Because she only felt pleasure and elation.
'Are you going to the hospital?' Darien asked as she refused to meet his eyes.
'Yes.'
'Are you going to tell him we're back together again?'
'Maybe. Are you going to the office today?' He always does.
'I'll come with you to the hospital first.' He sounded angry. "Tell your father you're back with me."
"Why should I?"
"Why not?"
"Because he's going to ask if it's forever this time and I don't want to lie to him."
"You're not going to lie to him," he said. "Nothing lasts forever."
Serena wasn't sure if she heard Darien's last statement right.