Siddharth pressed the buttons on the treadmill so that the speed increased. His calves burned as he exerted them and ran faster. His chest was on fire as his phone rang. It was his uncle Sanjay Sandhini. He picked up the call as his uncle's voice boomed from the phone.
"Do you know what your wife is doing?!" He blasted.
He kept quiet and ran. What had Sakshi done now? He was pretty sure she just did something minor and irrelevant and his uncle and aunt were going to blow it out of proportion. But he didn't know what Sakshi was up to. After five years of marriage and she was still a well-known stranger to him.
They had not even had one conversation in five years so his uncle was out of his mind if he thought he was going to reprimand her now. And even if they had that kind of relationship he didn't know why he was expected to reprimand her. She was an adult woman who was capable of making her own choices.
"What happened?" He huffed.
"I met Nitin today while playing golf. Nitin Sopara of Sopara and Sons Co Law Firm. He told me Sakshi is filing for divorce."
"What?!" His chest constricted. He needed to stop. He pressed the button to slow the treadmill down but in his shocked state he pressed another button and the speed increased.
He felt his nostrils burn and his chest constricts and his legs tangled as he lost his balance and fell backward.
He should've made some noise. But all the sound that came off was of him crashing and hitting his head on the floor. His chest constricted and he felt his whole body go numb.
His heart was racing and he couldn't breathe. Each breath felt like he was breathing in air that weighed a ton of bricks. His body broke into a cold sweat as he had chills all over.
Fucking hell. He thought. He hoped his uncle had heard the crash but he was busy rambling on.
"How could she do this us...that whore...she must be sleeping around too like that brother of hers..."
He tried to open his mouth but he couldn't even open mouth. His body felt frozen and paralyzed. His vision swam as he saw the overhead led lights getting brighter and brighter.
Is this how he was going to die? He wondered. In his New York apartment, on the floor. All alone.
What a pathetic way to go. That was his last thought as darkness swept in.
***
When he opened his eyes again, the overhead lights were too bright again. His head was blaring with a headache and he had to close his eyes with a wince.
"Sid?" A woman's voice called out to her.
Sakshi? Had she come? He opened his eyes and his vision focused on her face. It was not Sakshi. It was Myra. He felt a wave of disappointment. The Sid should've given it away. When had Sakshi ever said his name? He couldn't recall even a single time she had called him by his name or even called him? But what was Myra even doing here?
"Myra?"
"Oh, Sid? I'll call the doctors!".
She left him and he sighed. The quiet beep of the machines filled the room. God! How long was he out? The room was filled with a plethora of doctors and nurses. The next few hours were a pain. They conducted various tests to make sure he didn't lose his mind from the fall. But everything was fine it seemed.
In the evening, Myra had come back, she asked him how he was. He said he was fine.
"God! I was so scared. Sanjay uncle had called me yesterday morning. He said he was talking to you on the phone and he had heard a crash. I called 911 and they brought you here. Don't you worry, Sid. I've informed Sanjay Uncle that you're fine. He had arranged for a private jet. As soon as you feel better, we can leave for India. "
Siddharth knew about it. His secretary had informed him too. He had to go back to India. And thinking about India, "And what about my wife? Did someone inform her?"
The smile on Myra's face dropped. He didn't mean to do that but he found that Myra needed to be reminded time and again that he was married. Her flirtations weren't hidden from him. But he couldn't cut her off completely since her parents were great friends with her uncle and aunt.
"I don't know Sid. Why don't you inform her?" She smiled and handed him his phone.
Everyone in high society knew that Sakshi and he didn't have a normal marriage. And Myra knew better, courtesy of his aunt.
He took the phone from her and his thumb hovered over Sakshi's name. He wanted to call Sakshi just to spite Myra but would his wife even pick up? She didn't know he was in the hospital but the real question was, even if she knew, would she care?
He clicked the screen off. Myra watched him like a hawk. "It must be 3 in the morning there. I'll call later." He said but from Myra's smile of relief, they both knew he was lying.
He sent her away under the guise of being sleepy. He was wide awake as the room was dark with just the soft glow of the table lamp.
Maybe it was because he couldn't sleep but his eyes kept getting flashed to him lying on the floor of his apartment. Loneliness wasn't something new to him. He was orphaned at the age of 10 and he had stayed in a boarding school for boys from that age. He had no friends because being an orphan automatically made you a target for bullies.
Loneliness wasn't new to him but it was bothering him today. He was all alone. How had that happened? How did he have no one? He looked at his left hand. The gold band gleamed on his finger.
He wanted to wear a wedding ring despite it not being a part of his culture. Indian women had to wear many marks to symbolize that they were married but Indian men wore none. Even though Sakshi didn't wear them all every day, she did wear them on special occasions and Saturdays.
On Saturdays, when their family gathered together for family dinner, she usually dressed up in traditional attire, fearing a scalding remark from his aunt, he assumed.
It suited her and anyone with eyes could see that. She looked beautiful draped in a saree and with her hair up in a bun that showed off her lovely neck. The red saree that wore was the bane of his self-control. Red became her as if the color was in existence just for her. He wished he had complimented her once. How had five years passed?
His ring felt heavier than his chest did. Five years had passed and now she wanted to divorce him. He hadn't tried to reach out to her but she hadn't too. It felt as if everything was coming to an end.
Siddharth sighed, he couldn't blame Sakshi alone. In the initial days of his marriage, he knew she followed him with her eyes full of hope but he was too angry, angry at her brother, her father, and her.
He had deliberately built the distance between them. So he had no right to feel hurtful even if she wanted to break off from this God-awful marriage.
The question that looped in his mind again and again was, if he died today, would anyone have grieved him? Was he loved? The answer was a resounding NO.
He assumed she was spoiled. A spoiled princess who got everything she wanted. But she never wanted him. Not years ago at that party, not five years back, and certainly not now.
He wanted to be loved and he wanted to be something to someone. And he didn't want it to be his God-awful uncle and aunt. They would never love him. Never had, never will and he couldn't bring himself to love them too.
His mind tied back to Sakshi. Sakhi, his soon-to-be ex-wife if she got her way. Was it too late to try, he wondered? There seemed to be a wall high and wide between them. And he had built it brick by brick. Dismantling it wouldn't be easy but it wouldn't hurt to try.
He sighed. Should he give his marriage a chance or should he just sign the papers that Sakshi would send? He wondered as sleep teased his eyes.
He knew the answer to it. And he knew it wouldn't be easy.
***
Siddharth gave his duffel bag to the chauffeur. It had been a week since his hospital admission. He got out of the car and shut the door. Dusk was settling him casting an orange hue around the runway. His phone rang and he couldn't even believe the caller ID.
*Sakshi Calling....*
He looked at the time. It would've been 1 a.m. there. Moreover, he panicked, was something wrong?
"Hello?" He sounded so uncertain he wanted to groan in embarrassment.
"Why is your uncle suing me for 1.3 billion?" Her voice was cold.
"What?!" He remembered his uncle talking about Sakshi preparing for a divorce. So that's what the airplane was for. So that he could come home soon and rein in his bratty wife. He rolled his eyes. "Oh, that? We'll talk about it later."
He wanted to talk about everything face to face. "Okay. Get your secretary to book an appointment -"
He saw Myra peek from the airplane door as she walked down the stairs. Goddammit! He didn't expect her to be flying with him too.
"That's fine, Sakshi." He said and Myra popped an eyebrow at him.
"Okay. I'll see you then. Bye. " Sakshi's voice seemed breathy.
"Yes, of course, darling. I'll be back soon. " He said and gestured for Myra to wait for a minute. Myra's face was turning redder by the second.
"W-What?" Sakshi said and he panicked. He thought Sakshi had ended the call after that bye. Why was she listening? He didn't let the panic show on his face.
"I can't wait to see you." He said.
"Excuse me?!" Sakshi said. "I am Sakshi in case you didn't know."
"Sakshi, of course, I know. You're breaking my heart by apologizing. I know." He smiled. Oh, this was so fun. Teasing her had dual benefits. He could tell Myra to get a hint and at the same time get Sakshi all flustered.
" What didn't I know?"
"You didn't know I was hurt. Besides, I was just in a coma for like a day. So it's okay."
"What?! You were in a coma?"
"Yes." He sighed. "I missed you terribly."
"Did you hurt your head? What are you on about?"
"Yeah, my head was sore for days but I'm completely fine now. You need not worry, darling."
"Do. Not. Call. Me. That! And actually, this explains a lot." He wanted to laugh so bad. Not a chance was he ever going to stop calling that.
Myra was tired of his talking he guess because she hemmed. "Siddharth, we should go now. You should say goodbye to your wife. I'll be waiting inside the plane." She walked away.
Sakshi heard it, "Oh... Were you talking to someone else? So all those words darling heart were for her?"
"No, they were not." He told her. The wind teased his hair. " Sakshi, I'll call you later regarding the divorce. Let's meet and discuss it?"
"How did you know?"
"Later." He said and switched off his phone.
As the plane took off, he thought about all the ways he would break it to Sakshi that he wanted to try and save this marriage.
Sakshi Rane... No. Sakshi Rane Sandini was spoiled because she got what she wanted. Always. She wanted a divorce and it was going to be hell for him to make her want to stay instead.
***