"Masahiro..."
I'm sitting on my bed with my legs close to my chest and my back against the headboard. The homework and computer have been mores to the side table and Kousuke made his way into the room. He slid onto the other side of the bed and wrapped his arm around my back before pulling my body closer to him. I could feel the tears in my eyes start to build up and try to climb their ways out, but I kept them in.
"Masa, talk to me" the older man spoke.
I knew from the very gecko that there's no way for me to hide my pain from him. The tears made there way out, they trailed down my cheeks, and would be absorbed by Kou's shirt. He sat there rubbing my back and accepted that his shirt was being used to capture my tears.
"Why didn't he want me?!" I managed to cough out in between my sobs.
"What are you talking about?"
"Why didn't he want me Kou?! What did I do to make him leave?! Where did I go wrong?!" I'm sobbed, full on sobbing.
I can barely breathe and my throat feels tight. Kousuke held me closer to himself and wrapped his free arm around my small frame. He doesn't need to say anything, all he needs is to be by my side, and not let me go. I grip tightly onto Kou's shirt, as if he would slip away if I let go and he continued to rub my back.
"He's an idiot for leaving" he said softly.
"Why was I not enough for him?"
"You are enough, he's a jerk. Don't ever let someone's opinion on you change that."
"What about you?"
"Huh?"
"Do you want me?"
"Masa, of course I do"
"Can you say it...?"
"Masahiro, I want you. I want you to be in my life, to be by my side, and to be the reason I get up every morning. I wouldn't wish to imagine a world that you're not here beside me. I want you Masahiro."
Once again I'm crying, I love him more than I will ever be able to express. In a sudden act of bravery, I march into the living room and over to the doorway. My father is still there and Ms.Ooshiba is talking with him.
"I'm not going with you"
"What? Why?"
"You didn't want me then, so why should I let you have me now?! I'm going to stay here because once in my life I am truly happy and surrounded by people who love me, who want me! I'm not going to give up over some DNA. Please leave, and not return" how could I say all of this, it's not like me.
My father disappeared into the rain as Ms. Ooshiba stood there in shock. Kousuke looked at me with pride. It was getting late, so everyone went to bed, I snuck into Kou's room. The faint smell of cigarettes lingeries, but for the most part the scent of his cologne masked it. Kousuke laid down next to me and I placed my head onto his chest as my senses filled with his aroma. Our breathing patterns are naturally in unison and I can hear the beating of his heart.
"I want you. In my life and in my dreams; I want you to be there" I mumble as my eyes get heavy and I fall asleep.