☪︎ℳ𝒶𝓁𝓋𝒶☪︎
THE END OF THE WEEK
Lately I've been sick, Like throwing up every single morning, I haven't told anyone I've been sick because I don't want to ruin the cabin trip for anyone.
I can't even eat a bagel, it makes me sick to my stomach.
Right now I was looking in the mirror, My bathing suit wouldn't fit my boobs, like I've been the same size since high school. What the hell.
I just took off the bathing suit and put on a one piece.
Once I had my bathing suit on I felt nauseous again, I got some water and walked out to where everyone else was.
"Are you alright you look pale" Blaise said in a concerned manner.
"Yeah I'm fine" I said patting his chest.
"Are sure your fine?"
"Yes I'm positive"
I decided to stay out of the water and just sit on the edge of the lake.
I opened my phone calendar and started counting the days on my phone when I realized I haven't had my period in 4 months. Oh shit.
I looked down at my stomach, I mean I just thought I gained some weight. Now that I'm looking at it, there's a chance.
"I'm going to the store, I'll be back" I said getting up.
"I'll come with you" Freya said.
"No it's fine"
"No I insist now let's go" She said pulling my arm towards the car not letting me get the chance to put on pants.
Once we got in the car, Freya said she will drive. She obviously want to talk about something.
"Spill, when did you find out!" She squeaked out.
"Find what out" I said looking at the cars that go by.
"That your pregnant duh" She said and I looked at her weirdly.
"How di"
"For one you stopped eating Bagels which is a red alarm, Two your boobs are way bigger that you've been trying to cover with big sweatshirts.
And three I heard you throwing up almost every morning" She listed off, how the hell.
"Oh and big sister instinct"
"Nice" I said not knowing what to say, I'm not ready for a baby.
"Do Blaise have any idea?" Freya asked me.
"No and I'll like to keep it that way"
"What ever you say, but secretes are meant to come out eventually"
After we got 5 tests to be sure, I went home and went into the free bathroom. I opened the sticks and did my business.
Once the time was up Freya flipped them over and had nothing but excitement on her face.
"Positive" she said shoving the stick in my face.
My mind just went blank.
"Throw it away" I said before leaving the bathroom.
I sat on me and Blaise bed and started thinking what am I going to do. I turned 20 sometime last week. Even though I hate making a big deal about my birthday Blaise thought other wise.
I'm just 20 still trying to navigate my way through the world, I'm not even stable enough myself.
"Hey Tesoro" Blaise said coming in and kissing my cheek, knocking me out of my thinking process.
"Hi" I responded dryly cursing at myself.
"What happened?" Blaise asked sitting next to me.
"Nothing, everything is just fucking perfect" I said sarcastically.
I called my doctor just to get everything checked out as soon as we get back.
The reason I'm freaking out about having a child or possibly because:
FLASHBACK
"I have your test results back and, You might not be able to have children in the feature, due to the damage the accident did it makes your eggs weak. There are ways we could help, but if you do carry a child it's a 50/50 for a miscarriage" The doctor explained to 17 year old me.
FLASHBACK OVER.
I remember doing everything the doctor told me so that one day I could have children I just didn't think that day would be today.
"Somethings wrong" Father said coming out to sit by me.
"Somethings always wrong" I said groaning. I then got up from my seat and went to watch a movie.
Dinner:
For dinner we were having this Italian dish. I looked down at it and gulped. The feeling of noodles is making me sick.
"Are you alright Malva?" Faze asked me, I looked up at him and nodded.
"Fucking liar" Blaise mumbled only for me to hear.
"Why was there box's of pregnancy test in the bathroom?" Father brought up. I looked at Freya this bitch couldn't even dispose the box.
"Maya? Freya? Adara? Malva? Liliac?" Father said looking at all of us.
I glanced at Blaise while I was playing with fork and seen him looking at me. Like he was waiting for a answer.
"I'm gay" Maya said defending herself.
"Waiting into marriage" Adara said.
"Single" Liliac said which just left everyone looking at Me and Freya.
I exchanged a look with Freya which she got.
"Freya, Malva anything to say?"
I looked down at my plate, Would I want to tell people I meant theres a high chance I won't make it through the full pregnancy. I was glad Freya understood how I didn't want to tell anyone just not yet.
"It was probably all ready there before we got here" Freya said shrugging.
"Probably" I said shrugging with her.
"Well someone's pregnant here because there's also a positive test in the trash just right on top" ice mentioned.
Why is it any of there business.
I just got irritated with the whole thing.
"I'm pregnant probably going to have a miscarriage, are you happy now" I directed towards my father before getting up from the table and deciding I need to do something to take my mind off this.
The possibility of getting attached to the baby and having it taken away from me. I know there's a chance for a safe delivery, but that's a low chance.
I found this bench in the flower garden, and sat down.
I pulled out a tissue and wiped my eyes as tears formed in them.
"Are you ok?" Blaise asked me, I didn't know how to answer.
"I'll be fine" I said then Blaise came to sit next to me.
"Malva".
"Yeah" I said turning my head to look at Blaise.
"I love you, and whatever you decide is your decision. I trust your decision with how you want this to go about, I know keeping the baby is a chance to take, But terminating the pregnancy is also understandable" Blaise told me.
"I don't want to get an abortion" I spoke out. "I just didn't want to get your hopes up" I said sadly.
"Amara, I just want you to be happy" Blaise said.
"We'll I want you to be happy too"
"But I'm happy seeing you happy, I really am"
"I don't want to start you know buying clothing or making room just yet. I do have a doctors appointment next week"
"I'll be there, what time?" Blaise asked.
After I told him about the time we talked outside for a while before I started getting sleepy. Blaise tried to get me to eat, but I wasn't hungry at the moment.