The room was silent as the squad ate some field rations inside the merchant warehouse from earlier. It was dark, a simple lantern in the middle of the circle was the only light source.
You nibbled on the corner of your food, your stomach still sensitive after today's events. To your left sat Armin, staring at nothing, completely frozen. He hadn't even as much as raised his food to his mouth. You shuddered as a flash memory of the woman beneath you showed itself again, then left as quick as it came. Marco took it as a sign that you were cold and didn't even hesitate draping his own cloak over your shoulders.
"What's wrong?", Levi asked after inspecting both your facial expressions. "This grimy place kill your appetite?".
"No...", Armin answered before you could even look up at Levi. "Jean, there's something I don't understand...". Jean's head jerked up by the mentioning of his name, looking visibly stressed, however his voice was calm.
"What's that?"
"When I shot that gun to save you... I honestly thought I didn't make it in time. Sorry but... Why was I the one who shot first?". Your eyes widened a bit and Jean's head cowered in guilt.
"That's...", Jean started saying with his head bowed.
"Because the other person hesitated", Levi shot in.
"Armin, I'm sorry... I should have done what I had to do. Like you and Y/N", Jean apologised, visibly upset with himself for not killing the lady when he had the chance. You brought your knees closer to your chest, feeling Marco's arm snake around you to bring you closer to him. None of you had really talked about what happened until now. The rest of the day after they got Eren and Historia passing in painful silence, allowing you to beat yourself up more and more by the minute.
"I know what it is... The person that I killed... I bet they were a nice person", Armin said with a soft but sad voice. Your breath hitched. That was exactly what you had been thinking! You felt Marco's gaze on you, but you didn't meet it. You kept yours on Armin, curious as to what else he was going to say. "Someone that was much more human than I am... I pulled the trigger so easily... I did...". You felt the trickling, warm feeling of tears roll down your cheeks, and turned to bury your face into Marco's side, as to hide it. Your attempt failed as Armin and the others looked your way. "Y/N?", he asked carefully.
"Me too", was all you said after struggling to find your voice.
"Huh?"
"When I threw those knives... I didn't even think twice about it before I carried on. And that... woman...", your voice faltered as you mentioned her. "I- Who knows who they were. She was terrified!". You didn't manage to say anything else, inching closer to Marco to which he responded by wrapping his other arm around you and lean his head on top of yours.
"Armin, Y/N. You've got blood on your hands now. You can't go back to who you were", Levi suddenly spoke. You could feel Marco tense up and you lifted your head from his shoulder to look at Levi.
"Why would you say that?", Mikasa asked, worked up.
"Embrace the new you. Just think; if your hands were still clean... Jean wouldn't be here right now". The gravity of his words were not to be mistaken as you pictured the crate Jean was currently sitting on being empty. "Same goes for you Y/N. If you hadn't defended yourself you might have winded up shot. Or if you hadn't taken down that woman, she might have managed to pull the trigger faster than the others; Marco, Jean, Armin and Sasha being in range of her bullet". Your eyes widened as you took everything he said into consideration.
'That's true... And I would never claim Armin to be a bad person for what he did, why would my situation be any different?'
"I'll tell you guys why you pulled that trigger and threw those knives.. Because your comrades were about to die. Because someone wanted to see you and your friends dead, not giving you any second thought the way you two are giving them right now. Thanks to you two getting blood on your hands, nobody on our squad ended up dead. Thank you", he said sincerely, his words leaving a feeling of security and meaning inside you and Armin. It finally felt like you could breathe again. Marco sensed it and placed a loving kiss on the top of your head when no one was looking.
"Captain Levi, I... I thought it was wrong to be fighting other humans, and wrong for you to order us to do so. I was afraid of hurting other people... But I'm the one who was in the wrong! Next time, I'll shoot", Jean said determined. You could tell his desire to help anyone- and everyone really had clouded his judgement in a different situation such as this one. That's one thing you had always admired about Jean and Marco. They were soldiers for the people. Sure you, Eren and the rest cared just as much about humanity, but killing titans had always been high on the priority list. For those two, the most important thing had always been the people within the walls. It was sad watching them deal with such a difficult dilemma; protecting people by killing other people. In a world full of titans it shouldn't be like that.
"I never said anything about who was right or wrong. I don't even know myself", Levi said honest. "Are you really the one in the wrong?". His question lingered as he got up from his seat. "Now then. It's about time we hear what he has to say". You had almost forgotten about the merchant the others had tied down earlier. He was placed in a corner, gagged up, unable to move an inch. As Levi removed the cloth stuffed in his mouth, the man immediately started talking.
"Wait! I'm just an old man used for moving wagons around the-"
"I've met this man before", Mikasa stated matter-of-factly. "In the Trost-attack, people were calling him Boss".
"You hear that, Boss", Levi said almost smug. "Dimo Reeves, right?".
"Tch!". He knew he was caught in his lie. "We were just following orders the Military Police forced on us. And failed big time... Now they'll plunder the Reeves Company for all it's worth", he spit out, clearly frustrated with his situation. "They won't stop with me and my dumb son. They'll make sure all my employees die in so-called accidents".
"So you'll die without a fight? Trost should have collapsed by now but it has persevered. That's because the Reeves Company brings people and work together. I wonder just how many winters people would survive if it were to perish..."
"So you're suggesting I team up with you?", Dimo asked him.
"We just need to know where Eren and Historia are. If you're supplying the MP's, we can figure something out", Levi offered.
"But can you stop my city and employees from dying of starvation?"
"I can't guarantee it", Levi said honest, crouching down on one knee to get on Dimo's eyelevel. "However, you can trust that we'll move towards that end. We'll help you out on a few conditions; From now on the Reeves Company will join the Survey Corps in opposing the Interior Military Police Brigade, as well as the Royal Government. Your company will trust the Survey Corps whole-heartedly, and as for the last condition...", Levi lifted a third finger. "From now on the Survey Corps will receive priority access to any rare or luxury food, drink or product the Reeves Company obtains. Tea for example". Your eyes widened.
"Fantastic! That's a fantastic condition Captain!", you heard Sasha yell from the entrance to the building where she was standing guard. You smiled at her excessive excitement while Connie yelled back for her to keep her focus on her post. You realised the regiment would finally be able to serve something other than the same old porridge and mashed potatoes that you had been eating relentlessly every day up until now, making you feel almost as excited as Sasha sounded.
'It's about time our regiment gets the treatment it deserves'
"You've got yourself a deal soldier", Dimo agreed as Mikasa helped untie his hands, making him able to shake Levi's hand properly.
~
The rain was pouring as you stood all cloaked up, waiting behind the trees by the forest edge. The faint sound of a carriage and horses closing in could be heard, making you alert and ready to get to your assigned spot on a moments notice.
"- they are. I promised him I'd cooperate, so they let us go for some reason", Dimo's voice told someone as the wagon stopped on the road right by you.
'That's our cue!'
You moved quickly, joining Mikasa and Dimo in the front as they had been driving the wagon. The two Interior Military Policemen in the back peeked out of the back-end of the carriage.
"Are we there?", the dark haired one, you remembered to be Sannes, asked, only to be met by the sight of Marco and Jean pointing rifles at him. The other man, Ralph, quickly turned to the front to use as an escape, but you and Mikasa were already aiming your rifles at him. Marco knocked Sannes out with the rear-end of the rifle.
"Reeves, you damn-", Ralph exclaimed, his speech cut short as Mikasa knocked him out as well.
"Sorry about that, pals", Dimo said with the tiniest hint of smugness in his voice. You and Mikasa each grabbed a hold of Ralph and started carrying him towards the stone house Levi had picked out as a new temporary hideout. Jean and Marco did the same thing with Sannes.
Once they were placed in each of their separate cells in the basement, Levi strictly ordered you all to stay upstairs. He didn't even make you guys clean the place like last time, indicating just how much time was of the essence. You were just supposed to get the desired information from these men, then get the hell out.
You slumped down on a chair by a large wooden table beside Armin, the rest joining you. You were all exhausted, this intricate situation getting messier and more confusing the more truths you uncovered. Every day it became clearer that you were not just fighting titans anymore. That's when the screaming started.
'Levi must have started beating them...'
You all knew this was going to happen, but that didn't make it any easier to listen to. Marco stared holes into the table, trying to ignore the screams with a very uncomfortable expression on his face. You placed your arms down on the table, burying your face into them as to keep everything out. It went on for ages, no one saying anything as the screams rung out continuously, without fail. Hange and Moblit had eventually joined you, going straight down to the basement after Mikasa simply pointed out the direction. Not that she necessarily had to, as the screams made it obvious enough were Levi and the captives', were located.
"Too slow! Can't you see that we are in a hurry?!", you could hear Hange's muffled voice yell from the floor below. A new set of screams started, maybe even louder and more excruciating than before.
"It starts again", Jean broke the silence, and it was clear in his voice that he was struggling.
"I feel like the screams are louder than when the captain did it", Sasha mumbled, looking down.
"Even though it is to save those two, it makes me sick", Connie said bothered. You finally lifted your head up from your arms and resorted to your usual comfort-position, which was wrapping your arms around your legs and press your knees against your chest while resting your chin on top of them. It feels comforting; like it keeps your body from disintegrating.
"Let's face it... We're criminals now", Armin spoke out from your right, grabbing all of yours' attention. "The enemies that we are fighting... We're not killing them because they are trying to eat us. It's because their views are different... No, just the group they belong to". His head cowered. The amount of truth in his words hurt, and you couldn't help but bringing your knees in tighter.
"All of us... We're not good people anymore", he ended up saying, placing his head and arms in the same position as you had prior to your current one. You didn't know what to say to that. In fact, none of you did as the silence resumed. The atmosphere was heavy as everyone thought about the statement Armin just shared.
~
After what felt like ages, Moblit, Hange and Levi finally ascended from the basement. You and your friends quickly got up from your seats, eager to hear what they had learned, as you were desperate to find any important meaning or reason to justify your resent actions.
"The Reiss family is the true royal bloodline", Hange broke the news and you all looked at her with wide eyes and mouths slightly gaped.
"So... the true royal successor... is Historia?", Armin pieced together astounded.
"Yes. In other words, both Eren and Historia are likely wherever Rod Reiss is". Hange motioned to Moblit, who proceeded to hold up a detailed sketch he had drawn of a man in proper fancy attire.
"That's him. Rod Reiss; Historia's father".
~
The night went on, the rest of you heading upstairs for bed as Hange and Moblit went down to the basement again to talk with the two some more. At least there were no screams of pain this time. The amounts of rooms were limited, resulting in the boys having to share the biggest one, while you Mikasa and Sasha shared a room with only two beds. Moblit, Hange and Levi each got a room of their own.
You had volunteered to sleep on the floor, however when you all actually were ready to hit the hay, you and Sasha exchanged looks, both immediately understanding you were both thinking the same thing. You made your way over to her bed and cuddled up with her as you do every once in a while, the familiarity of this specific action calming you down a bit. Mikasa was already asleep, so you had to be quieter than usual.
"God, everything has been moving so quickly lately, I feel like we've never even gotten the chance to talk or process anything", Sasha admitted as you both laid facing each other.
"I know what you mean... How are you holding up?"
"Honestly, this is difficult... Not at all what I thought was going to happen when I joined this regiment, but I guess this isn't something anyone saw coming", she explained with a sigh. "How about you though? You've really gone through it lately, anything you need to get off your chest?", she then asked you worried. You gave her a half-hearted smile, feeling grateful to have a friend like her beside you at all times.
"You know, same. It's difficult, and I've really been testing my body's limits lately... But I'll manage I suppose. Once this whole thing blows over and we get them back... maybe we'll uncover the truth of where titan's come from and how to get rid of them! Then we can finally live normal, boring lives like everyone else!", you said optimistic. Sasha giggled slightly.
"Yes! Isn't that the dream! Normal jobs, normal houses. You and Marco can have a family, and once I meet a decent man, I can have my own... OH! Hopefully, he cooks", she added excited and licked her lips as she pictured all the different dishes said man would make.
She grabbed a hold of your hands. "Then we can invite you all over for dinner every day! And you and I can go out on walks and picnics with our kids, and I'll be your children's cool aunt!", her eyes was practically sparkling as she envisioned your future together. Your smile kept growing wider and wider as she talked.
"Hey! Won't I be a cool aunt as well?", you asked playfully offended. She snickered.
"Of course Y/N, you'd be the coolest aunt there is... After me", she quickly added with a wink. You nudged her shoulder while you laughed, making sure to not bee too loud as you remembered Mikasa sleeping right next to you. "What? It's the truth. The coolest aunt is definitely the one that sneaks in snacks to give to the child, and that is obviously going to be me", she stated matter-of-factly with a smug face. You brought your hands up in front of you, gesturing defeat.
"Okay, okay, you win", you laughed, and she joined in. As the laughter died down, you looked at her fondly. She really is one of the bravest and most genuine people you have ever met in your life.
"I love you Sash", you said, wrapping your arms around her. She quickly returned the hug, squeezing you so tight you thought you were going to pass out.
"I love you too Y/N"
And with that you both settled down, getting as comfortable as possible being two people sharing one tiny bed. Your conversation had cheered you up a bit, and you managed to fall fast asleep in the matter of minutes due to your exhaustion.
_________________________________
A/N:
So this chapter was a bit of a filler, but I still like it a lot:) I hope you all enjoyed it and the little wholesome Sasha and Y/N moment at the end there<3
I'll probably not update until some time next week as there is a lot of things coming up (work etc..) in the course of the next few days, including Norway's national day, which is quite the big deal over here hahah:)
Thanks for reading and have a great day!
~Jen