Liam Black
The liquid slid down my throat swiftly burning it in the process and I placed the glass down, satisfied. Bourbon has been my closest allie in staying sane these past weeks. Mads is obsessively clingy ever since what we did, I regret it. It really wasn't worth it and I felt like a complete idiot for doing that to Belle. Mads is always around now and I could never find it in me to tell her to leave knowing Belle is watching.
It's not that I want her to be jealous it's that I need her to know where I stand. I can't feel that way for her and if faking my attraction to Mads is a way to show that. Then I'll do what I have to do, anything to suppress those feelings. If that makes me selfish than fuck it I'm selfish.
I'm selfish and I can't change that.
I got up from my chair and ran my hands through my hair as I opened the door to my office. While I walked down the hall I noticed someone had already used the elevator so I had to wait. It must have been Belle and inside I was a little upset that she didn't say bye to me. After a second the doors opened and I rode the elevator down, making my way outside the building and to the parking lot. I hated how I felt right now.
After staring at the ground mindlessly, I glanced up and my whole body froze in place. My chest ached for numerous reasons and my fists tightened. I hated how much my heart hurt just from this sight. But, it did because, Belle and Nathan were kissing, she looked so happy in doing so as well. Judging by her smile that he was kissing into.
I couldn't stand the sight a second longer, "What the fuck are you doing?" I questioned, loud enough for the both of them to jump apart.
Nathan still had his hand on her hip though and I felt my body simmering with heat. Belle's eyes caught mine in alarm, slowly dropping her hands from Nathan. I couldn't take it, seeing Nathan's face so satisfied from kissing Belle irked me. He didn't even see it coming when I grabbed him by the collar, connecting my fist with his jaw as hard as I could. He fell back out of my grasp with a groan, holding his jaw instinctively.
"Liam!" Belle shouted in shock, how could she not she's never seen me like this before.
I was breathing hard and she only fueled my anger when she bent down to check on him with concern. He met my eyes with anger prominent in them and I wished he'd try to fight back. But, knowing the kind of guy he is, he wouldn't. Not now, not in front of Belle at least.
"Just go okay?" she spoke, standing up with him as he shot me a nasty look and he spared Belle one glance before backing up to go to his car.
He peeled off out of the lot before Belle turned to meet my raging eyes.
"Lia-"
"No!" I cut her off harshly, my voice bouncing off the walls which made her jump, "You lied to me, you told me you didn't like him yet you have your tongue down his throat." I spit, eyeing her with disgust.
I was being a total hypocrite but, I was blinded by such rage in my jealousy.
•••
Belle Fawn
"Liam I don't-" I stuttered, trying to find words to speak with.
"Don't give me that bullshit." he stated, glaring at me with anger in his hazel orbs.
It hurt me.
But, it also sparked some of my own anger, it made me mad because, I was so tired of this. I was tired of going back and forth between them. I liked Liam so much, he didn't know how much I truly had feelings for him but, sadly I was coming to the realization. That what we had wasn't enough for me anymore. It wasn't enough because, he can't give me what I wanted.
And it's only now that I finally really realize it, not to mention; Mads.
"You like him." he shouted accusingly, his jaw locking and I shook my head ready to confess what I've been feeling for him all along.
"I like you more." I yelled back without much thought, his eyes bore into mine and I couldn't tell what he was thinking.
Until he scoffed and looked away, his demeanor becoming closed off, "I don't care." he stated firmly, the tone he used was laced with nothing but, coldness.
My heart was beating so fast, I told him I liked him more than Nathan, he doesn't care. Of course he doesn't, I've known that all along. It just hurts way more to actually have heard it from him. He was so mad right now, I don't think he'd ever see me the same. He's looking at me as if I did the most horrible thing in the world, which I did.
"Liam I'm sorry I shouldn't have kissed him, but." I sighed, "I like him okay, he's funny, he makes me laugh." I explained, feeling a weight lift from my chest at the confession, "He makes-"
"Enough." he shouted, I shut my eyes at hearing the lividness clear in his tone, if I was naive which for him I am.
I might have caught a little pain but, clearly I know nothing. The way he sounded hurt me, he was still looking away from me. In this moment I'd gladly be back in a another where I was embarrassed to be caught looking at him. Just so I could have his gaze on me, I was almost afraid of what he'd say next.
"If you like him so damn much, we're done Belle." he stated harshly, "Fucking done." I looked up to see him shaking his head.
I almost gasped at the pain I felt at hearing that and he moved to walk passed me, "Now you can kiss him all you want." he mumbled, his arm brushing against mine as he passed by.
I bit my lip trying to hold back my tears, I can't cry. I would look so stupid, I'm the one who kissed Nathan. Yet after hearing what he said it reminded me of how much he really doesn't care. That alone hurt me, it hurt me more than I ever thought something could.
In pain, I spun around, "Screw you Liam." I replied, watching him walk away when a thousand emotions hit me at once by the words he said next.
"Too bad I already did that with Mads." I heard how sharp my intake of breath was but, I still couldn't breathe.
I knew it, deep down I knew it but, I just couldn't bring myself to believe that he'd do something like that to me. I couldn't believe that he would shame me for kissing Nathan when he did so much more. I couldn't believe that the one man I've ever been so intimate with would just throw that in my face like that.
I just couldn't believe I fell for him at all.
"I hate you." I mumbled, his form stopped in the empty parking lot, "I hate you." I stated more firmly, wiping at my face in irritation when I felt a traitorous tear slip from my eye.
This time I think maybe I broke through some skin when his demeanor faltered. Because, he slowly turned around and walked back over to me until we were face to face.
"You don't mean that." he accused and I scoffed, I think I've finally gotten the hang of this people stuff.
"Yes I do, I hate you." I repeated with every ounce of hurt I felt in my body but, his scent was surrounding me and I broke.
Completely.
"Too bad I already did that with Mads."
"I hate you." I restated, pushing him away from me, my vision blurring with tears, "I hate you." I pushed him again as the tears fell and he caught my hands in his.
"Stop it Belle." he said and I closed my eyes looking away so he doesn't see how pathetic I am.
Would Mads be crying?
I couldn't help it, I was so hurt I don't think I ever felt like this before. It was suffocating, it was painful and I couldn't control it. Suddenly my books were sounding real good right about now.
"Belle please stop crying." he stated, a slight softness to his tone, his grip on my hands loosening
I shook my head, trying to calm myself down. How could he give me comfort if he was the one causing my pain?
"I hate you." I felt myself mumble out of anger.
His hands dropped mine and cupped my chin to turn my head to look at him. He pushed away some of my hair that was matted to my cheeks from the tears. I still couldn't find it in me to open my eyes even with him obviously staring at me.
"No you don't." he stated irritatedly, and I felt him smear my tears over my face as fresh ones came down.
I breathed in deeply willing myself to stop before opening my eyes. Then I reached up and gripped his wrists to push his hands away. The hands that were no doubt all over Mads. I caught his hazel eyes that were drowning with emotions that I clearly know nothing about. A defeated sigh left my lips and I shook my head to try and control myself to keep what little sanity I had left.
"Yes I do."
And I did.
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Hey everyone I hope you're doing good and being safe out there. Here's another chapter that I also hoped you all enjoyed! It was honestly the first chapter I wrote in this book that made me cry a little while I wrote it. Y'all probably hate Liam so much right now...
But, anyways thank you so much for all the reads and support, I appreciate it. Also stop being silent readers!
Thoughts?
Feelings?
Predictions?
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