*(Light Fluff/Borderline 'Spice' towards the end of the chapter)*
You didn't hesitate for a second, everyone jumping down from Reiner's titan simultaneously. Luckily, your horses had followed the crowd, making you all able to safely land on top of them, riding a little distance away from the impact that was about to happen as the titan hoard reached Reiner. You all watched as Ymir defended Historia, her still clinging to her back, as well as Reiner keeping his hand protectively against his chest with Berthold and Eren still inside.
"What is going on... Is this hell?", you heard Jean ask himself quietly.
"No, but it's about to be!", Erwin replied to him as he started riding forwards. "All soldiers, charge!", Erwin ordered, reaching out his right arm with his blade in his hand. You all looked at him dumbfounded as he rode straight towards the threat, some even whispering that charging right at a hurdle of titans like that was suicide. "The fate of humanity will be determined in this very moment!". He stopped as he raised his arm up to the sky this time, his back turned to you. "There is no future where humanity can inhabit these lands without Eren! We recover Eren and immediately retreat!", he yelled and turned his head to face you all. "Give your hearts!", was the last thing he ordered as he pointed his blade forwards and started moving. Mikasa didn't waste a second, you riding straight after her, hearing the rest following you too.
In the distance you could see Reiner finally removing his hands, trying to rid himself of the titans tearing at his flesh.
"It worked! His hand's are gone!", you exclaimed eagerly.
"Now's our chance!", Mikasa said, picking up her pace a little.
"Hey, Mikasa! Can't you see all those titans?! How do you plan on getting through that mess?", Jean asked her frantic. You squinted your eyes in a focused manner, bracing yourself for combat as Erwin once again raised his arm and ordered for you to advance. With a loud booming noise, his horse was suddenly without its rider, red splotches all over its white hairs.
"Commander Erwin!", a scout screamed after him as you all turned your heads in horror to see his arm stuck in a seven metre class titan's mouth. It was one of the crawling kinds, the ones you hated the most.
"Advance! Eren is just up ahead! Advance!" he ordered, completely ignoring his current situation. It took you a second before you composed yourself, tugging the reins and doing what your commander ordered you to. The same went for the rest of your comrades, only one soldier staying behind to help Erwin.
Once reaching the hoard, soldiers were immediately grabbed straight from the horsebacks, the trampling and stomping of the titans feet enough to send some flying off, ending up eaten of squashed to death. You tried to pay it no mind as you closed in on Reiner's titan figure with fire in your eyes, forcing yourself to ignore the opportunity to kill him right here and now and focus on retrieving Eren and get the hell out of here. You were tired and didn't want for anyone else to die.
Mikasa swiftly maneuvered her way around Reiner, charging right at Bertholdt. He dodged her hit last minute, a titan able to grab her the second she tumbled a bit too far off of Reiner. She screamed in agony as it squeezed her hard and you could swear you heard bones cracking.
"Mikasa!", Jean exclaimed as the two of you set off towards her in a hurry. "You piece of shit! Let her go!", he screamed at it, cutting its eyes. It was enough to make it let go, Jean catching Mikasa mid-air as you took the opportunity to cut the titans nape. Turning to face Bertholdt you noticed you were at a perfect angle to launch an attack. Reiner had just put his hand in front of them to stop someone else from attacking, and you were by Reiner's right side, no hinders in sight. You clenched your hands around your blades, ignoring the shooting pain in you arm as you prepared to act. Armin suddenly appearing stopped you dead in your tracks and you landed softly on Reiner's shoulder, hiding in the croock of his neck as gently as you could so he wouldn't feel it and the others wouldn't notice you. It took a while before Armin finally spoke.
"Bertholdt! Are you okay with this? Leaving behind your comrade and returning home?", he started saying, his voice gentle and curious. "You're abandoning Annie? You know where she's at? Far north, deep underground in Utopia District... Being tortured", he continued, his voice still gentle, but becoming more intrusive. You furrowed your brows as you listened.
'She's not being tortured though? What is he-... Wait a minute... He's manipulating him, isn't he?'
"It was her screams that taught us something. That even with her body healing, you can never get rid of the pain... They're taking special care to ensure she doesn't die, however, as we speak they're not giving her body any rest. They are torturing her every way they know how!". Armin didn't manage to go on further about Annie's supposed torturing story as Berthold screamed and turned to face him. This was your chance!
"You spawn of the devil!", Bertholdt yelled as you sent a hook right into Reiner chest beside him, quickly reeling yourself in. Before Bertholdt could register what just happened, you cut a long cut across his chest, slicing the pieces of fabric he had used to strap Eren to his back in the process. Eren plummeted down towards the ground and you meant to follow and catch him, when Reiner's right hand smacked you from behind, leaving you in the exact same situation as Eren was currently in. Luckily, Reiner didn't hit too hard, so you only lost your breath for a couple of seconds, but now your gear was all messed up, a whole vital piece of it missing. You watched as Mikasa managed to reach Eren just in time and you smiled to yourself.
'At least we won't both die this way. Humanity still has a chance'
You closed your eyes, kind of already accepted your fate as something crashed into you, hard. Jerking your eyes open, you were met with the pair of honey brown eyes and freckles you love so much. He didn't say anything as his focus went back to manoeuvring and dodging the titans still surrounding Reiner. Your gaze didn't faulter away from his concentrated face even once, not until you were both back on the ground safe and sound, him hauling you up on his horse with him.
"All soldiers retreat!", you heard Erwin order. He must have survived the attack. You looked around to make sure Myosotis were following you, which to your relief she was. You relaxed slightly, leaning back onto Marco's chest as he steered the horse in Erwin's direction. You could sense his tense demeanour calming down a little as you all put some distance between you and the titans. He leaned his head forwards, his mouth by your ear.
"Y/N, are you-".
*BOOM*
You flew forwards, hitting the ground hard. It took a couple of seconds before you managed to lift your head up off the ground, breathing in dirt and dust as you laid face down. In the distance you could hear Armin scream out Eren and Mikasa's names.
'What the hell just happened?'
"Y/N", you heard Marco's voice weakly call out from your left, making you turn your head around carefully to meet him. He was crawling towards you, gradually going faster as he regained more control of his body by the minute. You got up from the ground, sloppily moving over to him, reaching out your arms for him. As you got close enough he took a hold of your hands as you helped him stand up. Thick clouds of dust surrounded you, preventing you from seeing anything beyond a two metre distance from you. You both coughed as the dirt started filling your lungs.
"What happened?", you asked Marco. It really did come out of nowhere. Marco wrapped one arm around your waist as to support you, ignoring the fact that he was in need for some support as well at the moment, and started looking around.
"I barely saw it, but it seems like Reiner started throwing titans in our direction", he said and started moving with purpose, taking you with him. Once you saw his horse emerge from the thick dust clouds you understood what he was looking for. "We need to get out of here", he said as he crouched down beside his horse on the ground. The dust was beginning to disperse, and you could finally see what was going on around you.
As you watched, Jean got knocked off his horse by another flying titan, completely limp on the ground. You gasped.
"Marco! Jean!", you exclaimed, and he looked in the direction you were pointing. You watched the colour fade from his face as he got pale.
"Dammit, Jean! My horse won't move! I think he hit his head or something. I don't know if he'll ever get up...", he said stressed and sad, placing his ear against his side to check the breathing. By the looks of it, the breathing only became weaker and weaker... It didn't look promising. Your started breathing quicker, looking around you to see if you could spot Myosotis anywhere. The distance between you and Jean was too great to run. You harshly brought your fingers to your mouth, calling out for her until you got lightheaded. Luckily, Armin had reached Jean and started pulling him away. Of course that luck didn't last long, as the very same titan that caused Jean's knocked-out state started walking towards them. Armin was now backed up against a tree with Jean in one arm, waving his blade in a desperate manner with the other.
"Shit, shit shit!", Marco muttered desperately as you kept on whistling. The wonderful feeling of relief spread throughout your body as you spotted Myosotis sprinting in your direction. "Marco, you take her! My gear is broken so there is not much I can do!", you said as you gave him her reins. He eyed you worriedly for a second, not wanting to leave you here unprotected, before a look of determination took over his face. He gave you a quick peck on the lips before he hurriedly rode off to aid your friends.
You took the opportunity to look around and assess your current situation. That's when you saw them.
'Hannes?'
Eren and Mikasa sat helpless in front of a fifteen metre class titan with the biggest, creepiest smile you had ever seen. Hannes was in its grasp, and you could see his legs wiggle as he struggled to break free..
"Hannes!", you screamed, running straight towards them. By the looks of it, Eren was biting his hands frantically, unable to transform. Every part of your body was aching, tears forming in your eyes as you pushed through the pain, refusing to stop.
'What can I do... My gear isn't working! Argh, why are you so useless Y/N!'
The titan brought Hannes to its mouth, feet first.
"Hannes!", you continued screaming his name over and over as you kept up an exhausting pace.
'Useless, useless, useless!!'
The second you reached Mikasa who was sat down on the ground, the titan bit down on his lower half, his blood tainting the violet flowers beneath him. You abruptly stopped with a whimper, looking into his eyes that gradually dulled, as he watched the three of you from above.
You could barely breathe as you fell down to your knees, unable to remove your gaze from him as you stared dumbfounded. Eren silently collapsed to the ground on all fours. He started doing that frantic 'crying mixed with laughing' he does whenever he is really frustrated with himself or very emotional.
"Eren", Mikasa said airy with a sad undertone. As the titan started eating what was left of Hannes you couldn't look anymore. You tilted your head up towards the sky, breathing out of clenched teeth as you cried quietly.
"Nothing changed! You haven't changed one bit, dammit! You are still as useless as you have ever been!", Eren screamed out between his cries in a heart wrenching pitch. It was painful to listen to, and you started crying more violently as a result of it. "Nothing changed!".
As Eren screamed another heart wrenching screech, you brought your hands to your ears; a habit you had picked up from Jean and Connie when you were stressed and emotional beyond measure. You squeezed your eyes shut and you brought you whole upper body down towards the ground, resting your forehead on the grass beneath you while you cried. The volume of your cries decreased noticeably, your tears still violently streaming down your face, however only occasional gasps for air could be heard leaving your mouth. You don't know how long you stayed that way, the hands covering your ears preventing you from hearing much. But you catched parts of their conversation, not that you were trying to.
'Live with purpose', 'Wrapped scarf', 'Thank you'. It was only when Eren noticeably raised his voice, you decided to look up and lighten the pressure of your hands on your ears.
"I'll wrap that scarf around you as many times as you want.", Eren said strong and determined as he stood up and looked back at Mikasa. The titan was seemingly done with Hannes, now reaching its hand out for Eren. "Now and forever... As many times as you want!". He firmly planted his feet in the ground, bracing himself for impact. You nervously but hastily scooched over to Mikasa, placing your arms protectivly around her back. You knew she was injured, and should Eren fail you had to be ready to grab her and flee. He screamed as he charged a closed-fist punch right at the palm of its hand. You gasped slightly.
It actually seemed to have done something, the titan retrieving its hand a little. Eren screamed again as a stomping sound became louder. Scared and shocked at the same time, you watched a titan charge right past you, heading straight for the titan in front of you.
'It is attacking one of its own? It's not even an intelligent titan, why is this happening?'
Multiple stomping sounds from behind you made you turn your head. Your eyes widened at the sight of every single titan in the area heading the same way as the one currently attacking.
"Y/N!". Still looking behind you, a little further to your right you saw Marco riding Myosotis, making his way over to you in a hurry. "Eren, Mikasa! You need to move!", he yelled, yanking you up onto your horse with him, as Eren lifted Mikasa up on his back. Marco had to move straight away as the hurdle of stampeding titans closed in, leaving you to clumsily try to position yourself behind him as you hadn't ascended the horse properly. Finally correctly seated, you wrapped your arms tightly around his middle, looking behind you so see all the titans attack the one that ate Hannes.
"Why?...", was all you managed to say after watching them completely tear it apart aggressively. Looking over at Eren and Mikasa, quite a distance behind you now as they were on foot, you noticed Reiner and Bertholdt suddenly close in. You were about to yell out for Marco to stop and turn around when the same thing happened again. Eren screamed something at him, all the titans now charging towards Reiner instead. Armin had ridden up to Eren and Mikasa now, Jean still unconscious behind him. In Armin's hand was the reins to Buchwald, Jean's horse, which both Eren and Mikasa quickly got up on. You let out a sigh of relief, realising you could go home now, all your friends safe. The relief was short lived though when you remembered Hannes, the confusion about why the titans were attacking in your favour had distracted you from the pain of losing him. You nuzzled your face into Marco's back as you shed a couple more tears for him, until you felt yourself completely drained.
~
The remaining scouts had regrouped once everyone had provided themselves a considerable distance between themselves and the titans. Ymir had abruptly turned back to aid Reiner, leaving Historia looking sad and worried as she rode a little distance to your left beside Connie and Sasha.
"I take it your horse didn't survive?", you asked Marco quietly. You could see his head slightly bowing and his body tense up.
"No", he sighed. You knew he loved his horse just as much as you loved yours. You tightened your grip around him ever so slightly, an act of support. You felt him put his hand on top of yours, caressing it with his thumb. "I'm sorry about Hannes", he finally said, catching you off guard. You didn't know he knew about it seeing he was helping Jean and Armin. You had on many occasions told him about how Hannes was like an uncle to you, telling him about all the funny interactions you had with him whenever he would visit your dad or come over for dinner. In other words, he knew how important Hannes was for you.
"How did you know", you could only but whisper, trying not to cry again, although it would be a tearless weep as you had already spent all the tears your body could muster using.
"I heard your screams... And then Eren's... I wanted to turn around and help straight away, but the titan was closing in on Armin and Jean really fast... I-I'm sorry Y/N", he explained apologetically. A few tears rolled down your cheeks.
'Seems like I had a couple more left after all'
"Don't apologise... You've done more than enough for every one of our friends today", you said quietly, nuzzling into his back again. He squeezed your hands with his, and it was almost like a blanket of silence was placed on top of everyone, the resent events giving all who witnessed it a lot to think about. You for one spent the time riding back towards the wall remembering Hannes and the many times he spent visiting your home in Shiganshina. His presence had always worked as a kind of evidence that your parents really did exist once. It was a silly thought, you knew that, but it always brought you comfort. And now he was gone...
~
It has now been a whole week since you got back from the retrieving mission, the scouts staying at a facility in Trost for the time being instead of HQ further inside Wall Rose. Connie, together with Hange and Moblit had looked into the situation in Ragako Village closely, concluding that the mindless titans may in fact be humans. Humans trapped in titan forms, unable to control it like Eren can. The revelation of you and the military killing people all this time hit you hard and you found yourself sulking in the corner of your room this evening, the betrayal and everything that has been revealed ever since the Scouts captured Annie, weighing on your mind. You heard a soft knock on the door.
As you didn't respond, they knocked again, this time slightly firmer. You grunted softly as an invitation for them to come in. You couldn't see who it was as you sat on the floor with your knees tucked in under your arms and your head resting against them. Soft hands placing themselves on top of yours gave you an indication of just who this mystery person was. You looked up at his kind face, tainted with worry as he noticed your puffy eyes, realizing you must have been crying not too long ago. He placed his fingers under your chin to angle your head up just a little bit more so he could see your face properly, swiping his thumb across your bottom lip once in the process.
"Why don't you get off of the floor and tell me what bothers you?", he asked softly, giving you one of his heart-warming smiles. You nodded slightly and proceeded to let him help you up. Your swayed a little, your legs felt stingy after sitting in that one position for such a long time. You leaned back onto the wall behind you for support, taking a deep breath as the thoughts wouldn't go away. Marco closed the distance with a worried look. "Please?", he asked, urging you to confide in him.
'I know I should talk about it, but I just want to feel something else than this empty, confusing feeling, even for just a minute!'
You finally looked at him, realising the sudden movement left your faces mere inches away from each other, the tips of your noses almost touching. You looked down at his hands before slowly grabbing a hold of them, leading them up to your waist. You noticed his breathing becoming unsteady as you let your hands run up his sides, gently, but shamelessly feeling him all the way up to his neck. That's when you pulled him in, lips crashing with a force like never before. He seemed surprised at first, your hungry kisses quickly rubbing off on him as he returned the gesture.
As the kiss became more heated, he let his hands roam around the area of your waist, ending with one hand on the small of you back, pulling you inn towards him by the hips, and the palm of the other resting on your side. He suddenly pulled away and leaned his forehead against yours, both slightly dizzy. He took a couple of breaths while looking down, before meeting your gaze again.
"Y/N?", he kind of asked, sensing something was still off and troubling your mind. You noticed a slight shade of pink forming across his cheeks, making your heart flutter.
"I...", you tried finding the words, not really knowing what you wanted the most at this moment; his warm hands touching you or his ears listening to your troubling thoughts.
'Fuck it'
"I just need you right now", you ended up saying, your tone sounding a little more desperate than what you intended for it to be. His breath hitched at your words, and he looked deep into your eyes as to see if he understood you correctly. "Kiss me", you borderline begged at this point. It was like you could see a new kind of emotion, lust, flash in his eyes as his lips were back on yours in an instant. His hands were liked glued to the sides of your face as he pressed his body against you. You held onto his forearms as you let his tongue explore your mouth in a more demanding way than usual. As you felt him tug and suck at your bottom lip you let you body move freely, doing whatever that came naturally. You felt your hand grab at his left one, guiding it down until you reached your breast. He tensed up slightly when he realized just what he was currently holding.
Marco is a very considerate person by nature and has never tried to cup a feel, wanting to wait until you initiated it. The last thing he ever wanted to do was make you uncomfortable. That's why this initiation left him slightly taken aback, but it didn't take long for him to relax into the touch. He started gently feeling them up, scared of applying too much pressure or being to rough, but when he heard the slight moan escape you lips he let himself hold on to them a little harder, sounds of pleasure leaving his mouth as well.
You had never been touched this way and Marco had never touched someone this way, this new experience making both of yours' cheeks burn by this sensual activity. Your kisses had become softer and slower as your breaths were heavy. Marco let his other hand move down from your face, caressing your body until he reached your thigh. Him also deciding to let his body move freely, yanked a hold of your thigh, pulling it up to rest by his waist as he placed his leg in between yours. You gasped slightly into the kiss as you suddenly became very aware of the warm, pooling feeling down below. He didn't purposely move his leg against you, however the constant motion of your bodies clinging to each other as you kissed resulted in your crotch slightly moving up and down his leg above his knee. This caused enough friction for your head to start spinning.
"Marco", you said airy against his lips. "Marco, please". Again, you didn't really know what you were asking for. This was all too new for you, and you hadn't really talked much about it with your girlfriends, the subject only coming up once or twice before. Marco hummed in a desperate and questioning manner, his tone telling you he was listening and wondering what you meant. You felt your heart pound harder. You just didn't really know.
Wrapping your hands around his neck, you jumped up and hooked your legs around his waist, Marco just managing to catch you in a clumsily manner. He supported you by holding on to your back.
"Y/N, what-", he whispered, but stopped once you started feeling him up under his shirt.
"Please", was all you managed to say. Marco started backing away from the wall, carrying you over to the bed while he kissed you. As he laid you down and backed away slightly to look at you, he froze.
"Y/N?", he sounded frantic, his hand twitching as if it were fighting with itself about whether or not to reach out for you or not. "Y-you're crying. Did I do something wrong, did I hurt you?", he sounded absolutely crushed. You couldn't help but make a shocked grimace as you reached for your cheeks. He was right, you were crying. Huh, you didn't even notice.
"No Marco, you didn't do anything wrong!", you quickly reassured him, internally beating yourself up.
'Why is this happening?! I really didn't know I was crying at all!'
He relaxed a little bit, but still not entirely, as he sat down beside you, carefully cradling you in his arms. "I'm sorry", you whispered. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry", you repeated, new tears started streaming down your face. You really did feel bad for ruining the good thing you two had going on just now. The new sensations felt heavenly, so the fact that you were crying without knowing it while you felt so good didn't make sense at all.
"Shh, no don't apologise", Marco cooed into your hair. "There is no rush, and there is clearly something else more important to take care of", he kissed your forehead. "We'll continue that another time when you feel ready, don't worry". You nuzzled into his neck, feeling so grateful for this man right here, holding you in his safe and protective embrace. "Now, tell me what's on your mind".
"Thank you", you whispered softly. Taking a deep breath, you prepared yourself to talk your heart out and air out these troubling feelings that were weighing you down enough to shine through even when your physical state was near euphoria.
________________________________________
A/N:
Sooo, that was my first attempt on writing something near 'Smut'-like hahah, hope it didn't suck too bad. That obviously wasn't proper Smut, but I felt like reader and Marco would approach it slowly as none of them has had any prior sexual experiences. I have some ideas for when some proper Smut-scenarios could happen though, so I was curious if you guys liked this and would like for me to write more like this in future chapters? I would really appreciate any type of feedback on this matter!:)
Oh, and also: Thank you guys so so much for 2k total reads! I'm grateful so many of you are taking the time out of your day to read what i write!<3
Hope you enjoyed this chapter and are excited as we move along to the season 3 events! I know I'm excited!:)
Thanks for reading and have a great day!<3
~Jen