"What do you mean I shouldn't go?!", you exclaimed. You and Marco were sat with the rest of your friends while Marco was cleaning your wound with an emergency kit.
"We're just saying you should think this through properly before you decide to join us. You can barely move your arm without flinching", Armin said determined.
"No, that's not-", you hissed as Marco gently patted your wound with a wet cloth. Marco apologised quietly, his voice indicating just how much it hurt him to cause you any kind of pain, even if it were to help you. Your friends looked at you with a sympathetic yet a 'what-did-we-say' kind of look. "-Fine... It hurts like hell, but I won't stay here. There is no way". You didn't even need to explain your reason as it had been made quite clear from day one of the Cadet Corps. "I know I can look past it. It'll just be painful, but my arm isn't broken in any way. I'm good to go", you continued confidently, ending with a whimper as Marco securely fastened the fresh bandage.
"Just promise you won't exceed your limitations Y/N...", Marco asked of you sincerely, holding your healthy hand. You looked at him, then everyone around you with a smile.
"I promise. Don't worry about me guys, Eren and Ymir is the ones to focus on right now", you said, and the second you mentioned their names it was like they suddenly snapped back to the reality of this grave situation.
"I made sure to bring you a new uniform and gear Y/N", Sasha said, breaking the silence, and you looked up at her excited.
"Sash, you're an angel!", you exclaimed, giving her a hug as she laughed at your excitement.
Both Historia and Connie had already received backup gear, there of course not being enough for all of you. You were afraid you had to stay back because of this, so you thanked the gods that this was one of the few times where Sasha thought ahead of time, making sure to bring you a change of clothes and gear.
You quickly got changed, Marco and Sasha holding up their capes to give you a little privacy in the midst of all the busy soldiers preparing for the mission.
It might be a long shot, but there is a giant forest here. We should head straight for it.", Hange said pointing at a map while laying down on the ground, still too weak to move properly. You all surrounded her to hear her suggestion for where you should head to. "I think that's where they're headed. It's a gamble, but I imagine they have to rest between changing, to regain their strength just like Eren has to. With the shelter of those trees they don't have to worry about any titans reaching them.", he explained her theory, and you were certain she was right. They both know about the forest and where it is since you were there for the last expedition after all.
"We should at least have until nightfall to reach them, as they'll probably rest until the titans are immobile", you said, looking at Hange who gave you an agreeing expression.
"My thoughts exactly! We have to move fast if we should have any chance of reaching them in time!", she said determined, Erwin getting up from his crouched position immediately.
"Let's get the last horses lowered down and move at once!", he ordered firmly, the crowd around Hange dispersing as everyone did some last minute check-ups. Marco went over to you and checked your harness as well as making sure it was fastened properly, moving on to checking your gear. You looked at him questioningly with your head tilted.
"I can't do much, but at least I can make sure your gear is up to part", he said sincerely, and you noticed just how nervous he looked. You itched for the chance to ask him about Reiner and Bertholdt and if he knew about them all this time, but you knew this wasn't the time.
'He'll tell us when we get back and things returns back to be somewhat normal'
You simply smiled at him, pulling him in for a hug, your hand stroking his soft hair. Three words danced dangerously at the tip of your tongue. Three words that you both technically have already told each other, but that carried a different meaning back then. You bit down on your tongue to prevent them from slipping out. Being in love was a new sensation for you and you didn't want to rush into things as you were unsure of how the 'rules' worked or what the expectations were. You settled for a kiss instead, making sure to show him just how much you cared for him with every push of your lips and every stroke of your fingers against his hair.
With the last horses lowered down to the other side of the wall you all got into position, saddled and geared- up, ready to leave.
"Advance!", Erwin called out from the front, and you ignored the painful pulsations in your arm as you tugged at Myosotis' reins.
~
You had been riding for a while when Erwin ordered for everyone to spread out into an arrow formation again. You grouped up with Connie, Historia, Marco and Sasha in the middle, behind Erwin's squad. You let your right arm rest on the front of the saddle when you didn't have use for it, wanting to save it for potential combat. The atmosphere was tense as you all rode faster than ever before. You simply had to reach the forest in time.
"What do you guys think they meant by 'our hometown'?... They can't possibly be talking about that place south of Wall Maria...", you decided to speak, not sure if you would even receive any response based on how tense your friends looked. You for one felt like talking and being quiet at the same time, these conflicting feelings fighting against each other inside of you.
"I honestly have no clue... I'm staring to doubt anything they have ever said to us", Historia answered quietly, not moving her gaze away from the road ahead of you.
"Yeah. I guess this won't make much sense until we understand their reasoning for taking them... Where did they even come from?", you asked rhetorically, your question starting a train of deep thoughts visible in the expressions of your friends.
Multiple red flares had been sent up from the right, however Erwin never ordered for a change of direction.
"Why aren't we following the protocol?", Sasha asked nervous as you could spot a titan in the distance.
"Like Hange and Y/N said, we only have until sunset to reach them. Changing directions all the time would extend our riding time excessively", Marco said before you could.
"I hope this won't be a reprise of last expedition...", Connie muttered quietly.
"It won't", you answered him confidently. "Annie is locked up and stowed away. Unless there is someone else hiding this kind of power we won't get chased". You all eyed each other in the corner of your eyes after you said that last sentence.
'Could one of them maybe... No. No way Y/N. They are your friends!'
You internally slapped yourself for even thinking that, although Annie, Reiner, Bertholdt, Eren and Ymir never gave you a reason to suspect them either. God, they are so many when you actually list them up.
"Guys, this is the time to trust in each other. You all have my trust and loyalty, and I hope you can put the same kind of faith and reliance in me", you said warmly but firm. This time they all looked at you, then at each other.
"I never doubted you guys", Sasha said with a smile, Connie nodding in agreeance.
"Me neither, you can count on me!", Marco said confidently.
"Let's bring our friends home!", Historia said with a confident smirk.
The sun was starting to set now, the creeping nervous feeling getting stronger each second.
"Forest up ahead!", you heard someone from Erwin's squad yell out a good distance in front of you, followed by a green flare directed dead ahead of you. You squinted your eyes, suddenly able to see the familiar forest entrance.
"Remember to act on your brain, not your heart this time Y/N", Marco suddenly said, inching his horse closer to yours. "That's the opposite of what I would usually tell you, but I know you understand my reason for asking this of you. We all want them back and for those two to pay for what they have done, but we need to be smart about this", he advised, looking you in the eyes. You sighed and smiled reassuringly.
"I know, don't worry about me. Please make sure to watch out for yourself... I can't lose anyone else", you said, your voice weak at the end. You looked at his kind and smiling features as the evening sun hit them, the wind ruffling his hair in a lofty way, complementing his facial structures.
"You won't", he said, his tone steady but with an undertone of sadness.
"Soldiers disperse! We believe the enemy has already transformed!", you heard Erwin order, breaking you and Marco's exchange of gaze. It was time to turn your focus back on as titans appearing out of the centre of the woods split the formation up into two groups, some going right and some going left. "Locate Eren and recover him!".
Some soldiers got grabbed from their horses, no one being able to help them as you were under strict order to keep riding so you could reach them in time before they fled. It still hurts just as much as the first time, hearing the sound of flesh tearing and bones crushing, but you pushed through it, looking dead ahead, avoiding riding anywhere that could pose a hazard of being grabbed.
Once you passed the immediate threat, you all turned towards the forest, activating your gear and making your way through the giant forest. A titan roar you recognized well rung out through the forest.
"What the hell was that!", Sasha exclaimed, but you and Connie exchanged knowing looks. That had to be Ymir. Once passing a hurdle of leafy branches you saw her. Ymir's titan, claws hooked firmly into a tree trunk, stood there, seemingly waiting for you.
"You can't run from me!", a scout said determined, taking to his blades.
"Wait!", Connie exclaimed, shooting out a hook, reeling himself in to hang right beside her. "This is Ymir! She's the one they took! In titan form!", he defended, everyone in the area also settling amongst the tree trunks, hearing him out.
"Hey, Ymir! Why are you the only one here?!", you called out after placing yourself beside Connie. She didn't answer, just kept looking around, almost like she was looking for something. "Where's Eren? What happened to Reiner and Bertholdt?", you tried again, but she kept on ignoring you.
"Ymir?! Did you get away from Reiner? Where are they?!", Jean tried asking, some trees further down.
"Please! Tell us anything! Anything at all!", Marco chimed in. Nothing. No response.
"Hey, Ugly! Answer! We are in a hurry!", Connie said impatient, moving up to stand on her head, jumping and trampling on it. She didn't even seem one bit fazed by it.
"Is she looking for Reiner? Or someone in particular?", Armin wondered out loud, looking around.
'Maybe she's on guard. That would make sense if she managed to escape... Unless'
"Ymir!", Historia's voice called out as she finally caught up with you. Her face lit up the second she saw the titan beside you, and she quickly made her way over, straight in her direction.
'Oh no, wait-'
"Historia, stop-", you started calling out when Ymir suddenly jumped. Your eyes widened as you watched her mid-air with her mouth wide open, closing around Historia's figure, before taking off into the woods. You all stood there shocked at what you just saw.
"She.. She ate Crista?!", Connie said dumbfounded, urgency present in his voice. Jean was the first one to snap out of it.
"Don't just stand there! Chase her!", he yelled, already manoeuvring his way after them. The rest of you were quick to follow.
"Why would she do that?!", Mikasa wondered.
"I can't be the only one who could've guessed it would turn out this way!", Jean said, looking at her. You guessed you could see his point. Ymir's involvement and intention in all this was still unknown.
"Yeah! She's clearly hostile to us now!", Armin agreed. "Looks like she's cooperating with Reiner! She lured us right in!". Your heart sank at his words. You had been so certain Ymir was on your side, the thought of her maybe betraying you as well added to the pile of emotional distress you seemed to have developed during the past twenty four hours. As you watched her reach the forest edge, a flash of strong golden light erupted to reveal the Armoured Titan. Both Ymir and Bertholdt quickly placed themselves on his shoulders as he started running.
"Eren! He's on Bertholdt back!", you exclaimed as you all stood on top of branches by the forest edge. "He's being taken away!".
"Don't stop!", Hannes voice suddenly yelled as he zoomed past you. "Get on your horses and chase!", he then ordered, quickly getting on his who had followed him. You all started whistling, calling on your horses who quickly made their way over to you.
"I'm getting him back no matter what!", Hannes muttered all the way in the front of your group as you rode after Reiner in top speed. "Even if it means trading my life for it!", he said louder.
"He's not fast enough to escape! We'll catch up!", Jean said, and you noticed the plates behind Reiner's knees was there once more, preventing him from running at his fastest pace.
"This time I won't hesitate. I'll kill them both, I swear!", Mikasa said scowling at them. "And if Ymir is in my way, she's asking for it too", she added, and you found yourself unsure of what you felt about that part. You didn't know what it was, but Ymir's role in all this felt different. Like she was just accidentally thrown into this. However, you supposed if she ends up actively trying to attack you and your friends, she must have chosen her side.
"I support that", you decided to say. "I'm with you Mikasa, they won't escape this time!", you said, and she looked at you with an appreciative and stern expression, giving you a nod of recognition. You felt a certain someone's gaze on you as what you said kind of went against what you promised, but no one said you had to be reckless to achieve your goal. You would annihilate them with as much poise and strategy as you could muster, you decided.
Looking further up you could see a small figure in the grasp of Ymir's titan. It must be Historia. She looked like she was talking to them, and seeing the way she wiggled and moved around, she was not able to get out of Ymir's strong hold. Once you all reached an area with vast stones coming out of the ground, you switched to ODM gear, trying to do anything in your power to slow Reiner down. Nothing worked as his armoured plates snapped the thin blades to pieces at every cut. You knew better than to try that and kept a distance, observing the situation in front of you. Bertholdt was sitting on Reiner's left shoulder, Eren tightly strapped to his back with a cloth tied around his mouth, preventing him from biting himself. Ymir was hanging on Reiner's back, Historia still in the grasp of her right hand. Eren seemed to wake up, which made your heart skip a beat. Mikasa's reflexes was of course even quicker than yours, her hook immediately fastened to Reiner's neck as she charged towards Bertholdt and Eren, cutting Ymir's eye as she moved. You quickly changed your direction as well, charging as fast as you could at him.
Berthold seemed to realize the threats as he quickly made his way in front of Reiner while calling out for his help and protection. You pushed your gear to its absolute limit, gas rapidly flowing out of it sending you flying at him, Mikasa one step ahead of you, when Reiner lifted up his arms to cover Bertholdt with his hands.
"No!", you exclaimed, stabbing at his hands in pure frustration once you reached them, just a second too late. Ymir tried hitting at Mikasa, sending her flying away from Reiner. Mikasa looked ready to kill her as she connected a new set of blades to her handles. She charged at her, only stopping because of Historia, who had placed herself between her and Ymir. You climbed up on Reiner's shoulders to get a better view of what was going on, Mikasa fastening herself to the back of Reiner's head.
"Don't kill Ymir!", she begged.
"That all depends on Ymir!", Mikasa answered determined. "I'll kill everyone that gets in my way, so choose!". You had never heard Mikasa this fired up before, but you could understand her reason.
"No, wait! Ymir will be killed unless she does what Reiner and Bertholdt say!", Historia pleaded.
"I can only care about so many lives... My enemies made deciding that easy six years ago", Mikasa said dejected. "So you're mistaken to seek any compassion from me. Whose side do you choose Crista? Will you get in my way too?", she then said, her scowling expression returning. Ymir took that threat seriously, preparing her claws to attack Mikasa.
"Stop, Ymir! Don't fight back! You'll die!", Historia pleaded, putting both Mikasa and Ymir to a halt. She seemed to listen to her, Mikasa deciding to aim her attention back to Eren and Bertholdt inside Reiner's grasp, you following her as she moved to the front.
"Good luck with that, Bertholdt", Jean said as the rest of your friends joined the two of you. You could hear Bertholdt asking Eren to stop struggling and kicking around him. "It's impossible to get him to calm down. He's the most irritating guy there is! I know that better than anyone!", he continued smug. "I hate him as much as you do! Let's beat him up together... Why don't you come out of there?", Jean continued to tease.
"Bertholdt! Give him back!", Mikasa ordered him.
"Hey... You're kidding right? Bertholdt? Reiner?", Connie said with a trembling voice. "This whole time... you kept quiet and deceived us? That's so cruel!", he exclaimed, wanting to give them a piece of his mind like the rest.
"You guys! Tell us it's all a lie!", Sasha pleaded, like she still couldn't believe it.
"You guys can't keep running like this! It's not going to happen. Didn't we, for three years, sleep under the same roof as comrades? Talk to us. Make us understand your reasoning!", Marco tried to reason. It was typical for his character to try and understand all sides in a difficult situation, no matter who it was on each side of it.
"We used to try and predict the weather by using your special sleeping positions, Bertholdt...", Jean said, ending with a slight chuckle at the memory. "And to think you, the invader, could sleep like a log, sleeping next to your victims! Was everything just a lie?". You couldn't keep quiet anymore, all your thoughts and feelings since they invaded up until they revealed themselves today pushing to be released all at once.
"For years we fought together! For years we helped each other out through thick and thin! You guys told us about your trauma, and we listened, and we told you about ours... I told you about mine! That you caused! That I watched my parents die while covered in some innocent mans blood at twelve years old, just wanting to go back home and give my mother a flower! And you guys listened so intently. You guys nodded and comforted me like it was the first time you heard about it, secretly knowing it was your fault! Reiner, you even said you would help me end the Armoured Titan! Help me end you! I looked up to you as my brothers, was it all one-sided? Was I ever like a sister to you?! How come you guys got to sleep peaceful at night while I had to teach myself not to scream in my sleep because of my night terrors!", you yelled at them both, your eyes wide, actively trying to push back your tears.
"We should just focus on cutting their neck open! If we hesitate for a moment, we won't be able to get Eren back!", Mikasa said determined as your speech didn't trigger any response from them. "They are both enemies of humanity! That's all there is to know about them. They are the real monsters here".
"T-tell me who!", Bertholdt suddenly exclaimed. "Who the hell would want to kill people by their own choice?!", he screamed, sounding utterly upset. You all looked in the direction of his voice with wide eyes and in complete silence. "Who the hell would like doing this sort of thing?", he continued, still upset but more controlled. "Do you think I wanted to do this?! People hate and despise us. We've done such terrible things... we deserve to die!". You felt kind of shocked as you listened to him, not expecting this kind of response from him. "Things we'll never be able to take back... But we just couldn't come to terms with our sins. The only time we had some respite... was when we pretended to be soldiers. That's not a lie!", he started to become more frantic again, sounding like he was crying. "Connie! Jean! Y/N! It's true we may have deceived everyone, but it's not all a lie! We really considered you comrades! Brothers! Sisters!". You crouched down and gripped at a part of Reiner's hand, your eyes squeezed shut as you struggled to keep your composure. Your sympathy and the part of you that still considered them as brothers fought against the part of you that ached by their betrayal and the pain their actions had caused you and the people you love. Tears were unwillingly streaming silently down your face as you struggled to comprehend what he was saying, Marco quick to crouch down beside you, holding onto you with one arm.
"Neither of us have any right to even apologise, especially to you Marco!", Bertholdt said, everyone jumped slightly and looked over at him as he mentioned his name. You didn't even want to imagine what they did to him, sparing yourself of the pain until Marco was ready to tell you. You simply moved your hand to grab a hold of his knee, looking at him. "But someone... Please... Someone find us!", Bertholdt finally pleaded, destroyed. There was a long silence, no one really knowing what to do after hearing what he had to say. Mikasa was the one to break it.
"Bertholdt... Give Eren back", she simply ordered, her voice low.
"It's no use... I can't", Bertholdt said, his voice hollow. "Someone has to be the one to do it. Someone has to be the one to stain their hands with blood!".
"You guys!", Hannes voice suddenly yelled from below and you immediately looked over at him. "Get away from there!", he pointed ahead of you and you all looked in that direction, eyes widening at what you saw.
'Erwin and his squad... is leading a horde of titans straight at us?!'
______________________________________
A/N:
Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! It was a long one, but a lot of action means a lot of describing, so I hope it was an okay amount to read and that I managed to keep it interesting! Stay tuned for the next part as our gang settle this matter once and for all- they thought;)
Thank you all so much for reading and have a great day!
~Jen