Chapter Thirty-Three
Give Up
I passed out after that. I woke up the next morning with an extreme urge to slap Rush for what he did but I didn't have the energy to sate my thirst for bloodshed. My body was utterly weak and my poor attempts from getting out of bed didn't work. It was freezing like hell too.
Seconds later after that, the ache in my head registered and I found myself closing my eyes and pressing my pillow against my head to stop it from pounding. What I was feeling was even worse than a hangover.
"Maxie, dear?" narinig ko ang mahinang katok ni mommy mula sa pintuan. Kumirot lalo ang ulo ko sa maliit na ingay na iyon. My senses were sensitive and my body felt too heavy that I feel like I'll be sinking in my bed anytime.
My mother then came in and found out I was sick. She wanted to bring me to the hospital but I told her how I didn't want to. Masama ang pakiramdam ko pero hindi naman ganoon kalala para dalhin pa ako sa hospital.
Hapon nang dinalaw ako ni Grant at mukhang hindi niya inaasahan na magkakasakit ako. He said he came because I wasn't answering any of his messages and calls. Hindi ko naman sadya iyon. Sa sobrang sakit ng katawan at sama ng pakiramdam ko ay hindi ko na nagawang tingnan pa ang phone ko. I don't even have the slightest clue where my phone is.
My dad personally called Mr. Herrera for me. He told him about my current condition. Wala naman naging problema kay Mr. Herrera ang hindi ko pagpasok ngayong araw. Bandang gabi na nang dumalaw sa akin si Kade, siguro ay dahil kakaalis niya lang ng office. I told him everything that happened and it completely pissed him off. He was furious, and I know that he wanted to say something but he decided to be smart and kept it to himself.
It was the second day when I stopped from hoping that Rush would come visit and see how I was doing. It was later that night when I found out that I made a good decision because he never came to see me. Kahit nga isang call o text ay wala akong natanggap mula sa kanya. Of course it hurts, but I already made a resolution to bring back the old Maxwell. The old Maxwell who doesn't let a simple pain affect her, the old Maxwell who's willing to do anything-just to get what she wants, and the old Maxwell who quickly recovers and stand up after falling hard.
On day three, I was left with cough and cold. Hindi pa ako masyadong magaling pero kailangan ko nang pumasok. My parents want me to rest for another day but I'm sick of bed rest. I've done nothing but stay in my bed for two straight days and I'd die not of sickness but of boredom if it lasted for another.
Dad gave me a ride to the office. According to him, hindi pa ako masyadong magaling para magdrive mag-isa. I didn't complain. I already drove a hard bargain when I told them that I'll be reporting to work today.
My work load was light. Aside from the papers that I was asked to give a brief summary, I didn't have anything else to do. I had lunch with Kade at the cafeteria because I didn't feel like eating out. After lunch, Kade headed back to his department and I went back to my floor.
"Maxie, will you please come inside, please?" narinig ko ang boses ni Mr. Herrera mula sa intercom. I pressed a button to answer before leaving my desk and heading towards his office.
"Goodmorning, Sir." I politely greeted and he mumbled his good morning.
"I have a favor to ask you," he said. A favor from your boss isn't really the type of favor that you can say no to. Asking a favor is more like an order than a request. It's something that I'm obliged to fulfill even if I don't want to. I mentally sighed. Maybe Kade was right. My social skills suck.
"Anything, Mr. Herrera."
Mr. Herrera smiled, pulling a drawer on his desk and revealing a long, smooth, and brown envelope. He placed it on top of the desk and slid it across him. "I have two meetings scheduled for this afternoon, correct?"
My forehead creased. "Yes?"
"The De la Fuente's said they have a few concerns. They wish to discuss it personally and since I can't move my meetings, I figured it would be for the best if I send you instead, since kilala mo naman ang mga De la Fuente, it'll be comfortable for them to raise their queries."
"What?" my response turned out a little snippy.
"Is there a problem?" kunot noong tanong ni Mr. Herrera sa akin. He looked genuinely confused. I can't blame the man for thinking that it's the 'best' to throw me to the wolves. He's right when he said I was close to the De la Fuente, but there's a bit of specification.
"No, sir." I shook my head and plastered an orchestrated smile across my face. "Do you mind if I ask who will I be talking to?"
Mr. Herrera smiled. "Mr. Rush De la Fuente."
Hindi na ako nagdalawang isip at sinunod ang gusto ni Mr. Herrera. He gave me an opportunity to see Rush, and I'm going to take advantage of that opportunity. Mr. Herrera asked his driver to drop me off to the De la Fuente building. I didn't bother declining his offer since I don't have my car with me.
I asked the receptionist for Rush's floor before heading to the elevator. He was on the fifteenth floor. I didn't think twice with going up. I'm not nervous at all. I'm going to face him straight faced. The whole elevator ride, I thought of what I'll be saying to him and in what order. The elevator pinged, opening before I can even make up my mind on what I should say first.
Grant's floor is similar to Rush's. I ignored the busy floor and headed straight to what I think is Rush's office. I was welcomed by a girl who's desk is near to the office's door. The girl stood up from her seat and smiled.
"Good afternoon, Ma'am. How may I help you?'
"I'm here for Rush. I was sent by Mr. Herrera." her forehead creased.
"Okay, saglit lang po." I just nodded at her as she sat back down to her chair and checked the monitor in front of her.
"Mr. De la Fuente will be attending a meeting in a minute." she raised her face and gave me a hopeful look. "Do you mind coming back?"
My mood turned sour. I lifted a brow. "Actually, yes, I do mind."
Mukhang hindi inaasahan ng babae ang naging sagot ko. Namutla siya dahil doon at halatang hindi niya alam ang susunod niyang gagawin o sasabihin. I mentally rolled my eyes. "Call your boss and tell him that I'm here."
"But Mr. De la Fuente doesn't want to be..." she trailed off when I scowled.
"Tell. Him. That. I'm. Here." I gritted my teeth through every word. She gulped, quickly picking up the phone on her desk and pressing a single button.
"M-Ma'am, may I have you name please?"
"Maxwell Ynarez." I snapped and she nodded.
"Good afternoon, sir. Sorry po kung naabala ko kayo sa break niyo." rolling my eyes, I crossed my arms and waited for what she's about to say next. "Nandito po kasi si Ms. Maxwell Ynarez. Sabi niya po pinadala siya ni Mr. Herrera."
Huminto ang secretary ni Rush at tumingin sa akin. Iniling ko ang ulo ko sa gilid at tinaasan siya ng kilay. Nakita ko pa ang pagkagat ng labi niya. May bakas ng takot sa mga mata niya nang tiningnan ako. Natatakot siya sa akin? Nakakatakot na ba ako 'nong lagay na yon?
"Sinabi ko na po sa kanya na may meeting kayo, sir... Pero sinabi niya lang po na sabihin ko sa inyo na nandito siya." paliwanag nito.
"Eh, sir kasi... Kayo na lang po kaya magsabi?" nangingiyak na ang mga mata ng secretary. Ano ba ang sinasabi sa kanya ni Rush? I grabbed the phone from his secretary's ear and placed it near mine.
"Just fucking tell her that I'm busy and that I don't fucking have time for her. Or do you want me to fire you?"
I snorted. "You can't fire me, De la Fuente. I'm not working for you."
"Maxwell?" may bakas ng pagtataka sa boses niya pero nawala rin iyon. "I have a meeting in a moment. If this is about the renovation, just have my secretary set a different appointment. Busy ako."
"Well, busy din ako, but I still made time and bothered myself to come here to discuss your concerns. Don't be an ass and clear your damn schedule for me." I retaliated. I was on fire. Mentally and literally.
"Ayaw kitang makausap." angil ni Rush sa phone. My heart was pounding hard in extreme anger. I threw the phone on the secretary's desk making her gasp. I turned on my heels and walked straight to Rush's office, completely slamming the door open. He was instantly in his feet when I bolted in, still holding the phone in his hand. His eyes were a little widened and I laughed without any humor.
"Maxwell," he warned.
"You're a fucking asshole." I pointed at him, my faked amusement now gone and replaced with ire. "Ayaw mo akong makausap, huh? Then you shouldn't have said alright the other day when I asked you to meet me and made me wait in the rain for three solid hours!"
Rush's jaw clenched. "Don't make a scene in my office, Maxie."
"Oh, shut up! I'm going to make a scene wherever and whenever I please!" I shrieked. "Kung wala kang balak pumunta, sana sinabi mo na lang sa akin para hindi ako naghintay sa gitna ng ulan ng tatlong oras at nagmukhang tanga!"
"Nagmukhang tanga?" Rush dryly chuckled. "I think you were just fine that day. It ended perfectly for you, don't you think?"
My eyes searched his face for answers. I shook my head, confused. "What?"
"Just leave, Maxwell. We're not going to talk about this. I don't have time and fucking patience for this kind of shit."
"No!" I yelled. "I'm not leaving. And yes, we're going to talk about this. And again, yes, you'll have all the time because you're going to cancel everything for me until we settle this kind of shit and you'll be fucking patient while we're at it!"
"Maxwell." he said in a clipped voice.
"No, Rush. You're going to shut up and you're going to listen to me explain."
"No, I'm not going to listen to anything. I'm done. We're done. You're going to leave and go back to Grant like you always do."
"I waited for you." I started, ignoring everything that he just said. His cold face crumbled and he looked puzzled. "I waited for you to come. It rained but I didn't leave because I told you that I would wait. I waited because I thought you'd come. Akala ko kasi hindi mo ako matitiis kaya naghintay pa rin ako."
He stayed quiet. I wasn't sure if he's listening or not. I just continued talking. "And you know what's stupid? Nung umulan, alam ko na hindi mo ako pupuntahan pero hindi ko pa rin magawang umalis. Kasi hindi ko matanggap. I was in denial. The whole time, I made myself believe that you're going to come."
"Then I got sick but that didn't stop me. For two days, I still waited for you to come. I still hoped, everytime that my door will open, I kept on hoping that it'll be you that I'll see. But you still didn't come..." I whispered the last sentence as tears came tumbling down my cheeks.
"It hurt. I was so mad. I wanted to hurt you and make you feel as twice as awful. And you know what's even more stupid? I can't make myself blame you for it. That even if I try, I can't make myself hate you. Those two days, I thought but nothing of how much I deserved the cold, how I deserved the way you treated me."
Inangat ko ang kamay ko at pinunasan ang pisngi. Bahagya pa akong natawa kahit wala naman nakakatawa. "Then, I thought... Maybe I should just give up. Maybe I should stop loving you."
A different emotion painted across Rush's face. I couldn't read it because I was too mixed up with my own emotions. Panic? Dread? Trepidation? I wasn't sure.
"Then I tried to imagine a life without you, a life where in I won't be loving you... And you know what I saw?" I let out a sad smile. "Death."
Silence surrounded us and I've ran out of words. I already said my piece. I know I should give him the apology that he deserves but I was emotionally wiped out. I already made myself too vulnerable. I was done for the day.
I was readying myself to leave. I could't stand in front of him any longer. I'd melt. My spinning head didn't help with my situation. I wanted to go home and sulk everything away. Or maybe go out alone for an ice cream until my sadness fades.
"Grant was with you." I heard Rush whisper. My head lifted as I looked at him with surprise. I didn't expect him to say anything.
"What?" I asked.
"In the rain. He was with you." my heavy heart tingled at what he said. I want him to repeat what he said but I also didn't want to ruin it. I'm scared that he'll change his mind and shut up.
"You were there?" I asked again.
"He was kneeling in front of you, touching your lips." his soft voice was slowly turning stark. And I was delighted.
"You were there!" I exclaimed happily as I ran into him for a hug, wrapping him with my arms and burying my face in his chest.
Just like that, the hours of waiting didn't matter. The pain, the doubts, the rain... All of it didn't matter. He was there, he came just like how I thought he would do, and that's what matters.
Rush didn't hug me back but he didn't push me away either. He didn't say anything else and I let myself hug him as tight as I could. I've missed his warmth. I've missed his scent. I've missed him and everything about him.
My decision was absolute. And this sealed it with an indestructible lock.
"I will never give you up, Rush." I lifted my face from his chest and saw him looking down at me with an unreadable face. I smirked. "I'm going to make you fall for me again, baby, and I'm going to make you fall hard."