Both doors were jammed in, he tried calling for help. I was the first in line rushing towards them, the people had divided themselves some went to help the other two from the first accident another set helped the trailer guy and another helped me with my parents, the door on all sides was jammed in my mom was bleeding she had a glass through her shoulder.
"Hang on dad I am coming." I really tried, we tried, but it wasn't enough within seconds the area was covered in flumes, hot red angry burning flames, my parents, the trailer driver and a little kid didn't survive that day. I fell to my knees I had never cried, but that day I did cry, I had hope that the fire would be put out and my parents would survive but unfortunately their were no other survivors, from the flames.
After that day, I considered women as nothing but despicable low life breeds.
I hated her and I lived with hatred towards the bitch that had done all this to me.
I hated Vanessa Dahlia.
---
"After that day, he started drinking, he went for drugs and he started smoking, Vanessa was a bad influence in his life, he treated every woman with hatred including his childs nannies, and because of that they also treated Isabelle with so much hatred, so you see Amber he isn't the way he is because he wants to but because things happened to him that made him like this." he took a pause and took a sip from his half empty cup, my tea was long forgotten.
"That is so horrible, but it still doesn't explain why she is back and what she wants from him." he sighed "like I said, she was and is unstable, Amber, she went after you yet your not anything to Lennon." The memories from the morning where he held me at the kitchen counter came back to me, "Amber can I ask you something ?" I looked back at him,
"Why do you think he still has you in his house?"
--
It was already dark by the time I had reached his house, my stained cloth long forgotten, I didn't know what to feel, I felt hallow, empty and broken, but not for me, for him. He had gone all through this, raising a kid all on his own, I couldn't even imagine what went through his head, what his thoughts where, there was something I needed to do, to prove Carl wrong, to prove him otherwise.
My bag was ready, seated by the left side of my bed, I walked to Isabelle's room she was getting ready for bed. She smiled at me when she saw me, the other time she screamed not because she saw me fall or saw what happened between her dad and I but because she had a nightmare. "Hey you" I said, she patted her bed and I gracefully sunk down. :Would you like a story?" she nodded.
I held onto Mr Rabbit.
"Rabbit dear what is wrong ?
Your looking all gloomy and alone."
"Mare Hare my friend dear.
Isn't happy but all alone.
I try to play, I bring him snacks,
But he pushes them away,
And shouts leave me alone."
A tear ran down my face and Isabelle looked at me with sad eyes,
"Don't feel bad you have me,
Isabelle and I are with you,"
"I know I know it isn't the same,
Without Mare Hare my friend dear.
Maybe I should go and give him space,
He seems happy and free,
When I am not around.
But tell Isabelle I said,
I love you."
I handed her back her stuffed rabbit and carried her in my arms, I had to stay strong and not break down, she pushed from me and said
"Mr Rabbit don't go.
It won't be the same without you.
Isabelle would be sad, and cry,
Who will be there to make her smile ?
Please stay and play with me.
Mare Hare my friend dear,
Will come, you will see."
Did she understand what I had said I also didn't understand what I had said, but all I knew was that the words were true, I had to go, I had to give him space, I rocked Isabelle until she slept I placed her gently on her bed and kissed her forehead goodnight, "Till we meet again Isabelle, you might not have come from me, but I love you like my very own."
****
I stood in front of his door, for two reasons one I had to give him a file that Carl had asked me to give him and two for the other reason, I knocked three times, I heard footsteps he opened the door and looked at me "Carl asked me to give you this, he said that you said you needed it so he asked me to give it to you." He took It from me and still held the door open.
"I will be leaving first thing tomorrow morning," I paused waiting for him to speak to say anything but he didn't he just looked at me. "Good night" he turned to close the door. "Wait" he opened it, where was courage when you needed it ?
I pushed the door open stepped in and kissed him, he didn't hesitate he kissed me back, he pulled me in and shut the door. We kissed for so long that we were both panting when we released each other.
_______________________________________