•Daryl•
"Temi let's go na" I urged from where I stood beside him before the stairs. "Wait na,let me make sure no junior idiot is here" he told me,scanning the corridors of the block.
"There's nobody abeg,let's go" I grumbled,turning on my heels and beginning my ascent up the stairs. "I just need to be sure,I don't know why they still want to hold this thing today" Temi complained,following me in close range.
"Like ehn,I thought Tobi was going to leave this thing for another day na,test is on Monday here" I added to his complaint. "Let's just go and come back abeg" he sighed as we turned into the right corridor.
"Is Yomi coming?" I questioned as strode down the corridor. "You know that it's only test week that that guy used to be humble. If he comes,he will be hung over tomorrow...." I was quick to cut him off.
"But tomorrow is Sunday na" I told him. "Ehn na,but you know how his father is. You sef,you know na" Temi pointed out the fact that I should already have an idea of Yomi's situation.
"Its true sha,plus all the issues he is still trying to juggle" I told him. "Exactly" Temi concurred. We walked for a while,the booming sound of music from what I guessed was a bluetooth speaker slowly beginning to grace our ears as we drew closer to the C-class where our minor sit out was meant to hold.
"Do you plan on drinking?" Temi questioned as we reached the class and walked in. "What did you say? If I'm going to drink?" I questioned back over the now blasting music from the speakers,as I'd been unable to catch all his words. "Yes!" He barely yelled back.
"I dont think so!" I called back to him as we joined the group of boys who'd scattered themselves at all corners of the class,some who stood at the corridors as they had the company of girls,some who had taken to drinking and playing board games,others who seemed to be setting up the comestibles which had been snuck into the school by some illegal means.
After series of greetings and exchange of handshakes,Temi and I finally settled at the last seat of the class. "I'm sha just waiting for the barbeque,that's what I'm here for" Temi laughed,the faint smell of fermented molasses from the drinks beginning to interlaced itself with the oxygen in the atmosphere.
"Guy! No be lie abeg" I chuckled in agreement knowing that those sweetly grilled catfish were what Temi and I always anticipated,our motivation to come for evening gatherings like these. We always got invited to almost everything,but noone knew that the key to our being present was barbeque being on the menu.
Everyone seemed to be having their best time,our upcoming test seemed to be the last thing on their mind. "How far na? I thought you people weren't coming?" Sele questioned,walking to where we sat and taking a seat at the edge of the table.
"We just say make we come once once" Temi replied with a shrug. "How come you came?" I was the next person to question Sele. "Hostel was boring abeg,plus this Econs textbook is killing me" Sele groaned,earning a chuckle from Temi as he hung his knee against the desk.
"I think I'll soon give up on that textbook" Temi laughed. "Na so,Econs script go show now,na only Temi go knack perfect score" Sele mused with a deep chuckle.
"With where I am in that book ehn,if I get up to half of that perfect score,I go do thanksgiving" Temi replied admist his laughs. "But how that woman go teach full first term work for test na?" I questioned,joining their laughter.
"Like guy! What the actual f*ck?!" Sele laughed,standing up and going to pick a red plastic cup from the table which they'd been stacked. "Temi I know you're not drinking,Daryl how far you?" Sele questioned.
"Meaning what na?" I attacked him. "Temi hardly drinks" he told me with a shrug. "I'm not drinking sha" I finally replied his questioned,crossing my arms over my chest.
"Ahah,why na?" He questioned. "I'm not just feeling it abeg" I told him and he nodded in understanding. He directed another question at Temi,one which I failed to catch as my attention had been seized by a figure waltzing past the corridors of the class.
I felt my insides suddenly become alert as I sat up in my place. "You guys,I'll coming back" I informed them before taking to my feet and making my way out of the class.
"How far Daryl? We wan start oh" Tobi called out to me just before I walked out. "I dey come!" I yelled back over my shoulder before continuing in my way to A-class,my ears picking her voice even before I got to the class.
"Where did you leave it?" She questioned whoever had accompanied her to the class. "I think it's in my class,I'm coming" I recognised Jade's voice just before I stepped into the class.
"Hey" I called,earning her attention as she averted her gaze to where I stood at the doorway. Her expressions morphed into something rather unreadable as she stared at me,giving off a low reply a few seconds later. "Hi...Daryl"
"How far? How come you're in school block this evening?" I asked,walking in and leaning on the desk opposite hers as she lowered herself into her seat. "I cant come to school block again?" She questioned back with her all too familiar sass.
"Its never that serious Kainene" I told her with a chuckle making her look at me as her lips finally etched up in a smile. It calmed me,because I was at the brink of concluding she was on an edge.
I didnt give much thought to it,but during the late parts of the week,she always seemed like she had too much on her mind everytime she looked at me,it was like she wanted to say something but couldn't. Once I'd caught her gaze resting on me but she seemed in deep thought,like she was trying to find the answers to her questions but couldn't. She seemed out of balance.
"I just came to get some of my books,school block isnt really a place for me on Saturday evenings" she told me lowly,even her voice sounded different. "Kainene! I've gotten it!" Jade's voice impinged on the calm aura of the class as she walked in from the back door,before I could give Kainene a reply.
"Thank God" Kainene replied,taking to her feet. "Oh,Daryl Hi" Jade smiled as she reached me,which I mirrored. "Hey,Jadesola"
"Aren't you here for that you people's party or something?" Kainene suddenly questioned. "Yeah,sort of" I gave a curt reply. "Okay,have fun" she sighed before brushing past me,indifference being the new emotion to grace her orbs. I contemplated stopping her but I let it go as Jade bid me goodbye,following her friend in close range.
"So this is where you came?" Temi's voice informed me of his prescence,averting my gaze from where it lay watching the door they'd walked out of to where he now sat on Kainene's desk.
"Yeah,I guess" I replied with a shrug,my mind still reeling with questions and weighing the possibilities as to what was going on with Kainene. She wasn't completely off,but there was something,it wasnt there but it was.
"Daryl" Temi called with a firmer voice,causing me to lend him more of my attention. "What's up?" I questioned dryly,a bit agitated at his drawing me back to earth. "What's up with you?" He asked.
"Like how?" I asked back. He sighed,his gaze darting to the floor for a while. "I've been noticing you know,with Kainene and all" he told me,now causing me to sigh.
"And I know you,this doesnt just seem like your way of doing things. So what's going on?" He questioned. "I already told you I dont have plans of doing anything stupid with her..." he cut me off.
"I know and that's why I'm asking you,what's happening? How do you feel?" He told me. "My intentions towards Kainene are as clean as they could ever be" I barely confessed to him.
He stared at me for a while before crossing his arms over his chest. "Do you like her?" He questioned but I resigned from giving him an answer. "I dont know Daryl but I actually like seeing you really intentional about someone. I can see it,the way you care about her. That's why I'm asking" he pointed out.
"If I give you an answer,will you tell me about Oghale?" I questioned, taming the smirk which grew over my lips. "We're cool Daryl,that's all" he gave a breezy answer which only made me glare at him more.
"Seriously Daryl,abeg. We're cool. You just answer me joorh. Do you like her?" He questioned again,this time setting me in deep thought. I took a while to contemplate,was I ready to let someone in on my little secret?
"Yeah,I think I do" I finally gave him a reply,admitting my feelings out loud. I finally understood why it was so hard to do. Feeling my heart pump at a faster rate even though I'd done no tedious exercise and my breathing grow erratic no matter how many times I tried to keep it in check,it took courage to actually admit it.
"How much?" He pushed on. "Like crazy" I replied on a whim. "Awwn" He cooed and I looked back to him. On seeing how his orbs grew with so much amusement and jubilance as well made me realise what I'd said but still didn't regret.
"Abeg let's go" I told him,taking to my feet and walking out of the class,causing his to give off a laugh as he rushed after me. "Seriously guy,I'm so proud of you" he told me,making me roll my eyes.
"For liking a girl?" I questioned. "For liking a girl sincerely,for being serious for once. Treat her right,you bastard" he told me,slapping the back of my head lightly. "Yes Sir" I saluted amidst my laughs.
Despite the noisy aura of the class we'd returned to,I found my thoughts racing back to Kainene. I was sure of my feelings for her,but I was far from being sure about hers.
•Kainene•
Test week was practically hell for me. I had so much on my mind that sometimes I started feeling grateful to my books for the effective distraction. But it wasnt a hundred percent effective in the long run.
I still felt my mood depreciate everytime my gaze found Daryl,the ambivalence of wanting to be around him and trying to put some distance between us became almost too much for me to handle. I tensed everytime he looked at me,I felt like he could see through me each time he did. Sometimes,I wished he could,I wished he could see the doubts in my mind and give me some form of assurance,any form at all.
Walking on the slabways under the scorching Friday afternoon sun,heading for the refectory from school block as I'd just written Chemistry which was my last paper,I felt that familiar ambivalence grow in me again. I was happy that the tests had come to an end,but I felt sad because now my mind would have all the time to over think and even draw up irrational conclusions for itself. I felt torn already,I'd never been so confused.
Snapping out of my thoughts,I looked up and noticed I was threading a bit too slowly for someone who was subjected to the heat of this part of the tropics. I willed my legs to move faster but instead,it became slower as a voice met my ears from behind me.
"Andrew,abi you know that bet wey me and Daryl make?" I heard someone question and I suddenly became keen on listening as my pace of walking became slower that the previous one.
"Which one? I no been dey when una make that bet oh. The one about that Kainene babe?" The one who seemed to be Andrew questioned. My heart practically skipped a beat or more precisely,dropped to my stomach at his words.
"Yes na,that one" the other guy replied. My brows furrowed in confusion,my joints suddenly growing weak for reasons other than global warming. "I dey think say he still dey try run am sha and him don even pay the 10k on top the babe head" the voice told Andrew.
"I no know oh..." Andrew trailed off,more like his voice hitched in his throat. The rest of his replies came off as muffled warnings and I took it that he'd noticed I was walking just a few metres away from them. My gaze fell to the floor as cold seeped into me,I felt shudders run through my body,it was like everything I'd been afraid of had been thrown right at my face. This had to be a lie or some sort of dream.
"Guy,this thing wey you do no fresh" I heard Andrew finally tell whoever he'd been talking with before walking briskly,practically storming past me. The other person finally walked past me too,taking a glance at me as if to make sure I'd heard everything,Collins.
I paused in my tracks as they walked farther away from me,clutching the material over my chest which had begun to ache at the sinking in of the information. I was a bet?! I'd spent the whole week trying to convince myself that maybe he meant what he'd told me that evening but all my efforts had just been thrown into the deep blue sea.
I was a freaking game to him,another toy he'd picked out for the semester. Onome was right,he was just being the playboy he was and I'd believed his flimsy words,I'd allowed them to move me,like the fool I was.
My breath ragged as I straightened up and began to take slow steps forward. I didnt know what to feel,anger or hurt. Like I finally made a decision,my blood began to boil. Everything finally made sense,why he suddenly wanted to be friends,why he suddenly burrowed himself into my life and now he'd successfully messed up my life and I'd let him.
I should have resisted him long enough,I should have been smarter than this. How could I make the same mistake as my mum? Did this mean I was just like her? No! I wasnt and I would never be. I was going to get answers and I was going to get them now. With my mind made up,my feet moved swiftly against the slabways as I headed for the refectory,my hands balling into fists and anger being the only emotion left on my mind.
The refectory was as good as empty as the rest of the students,who werent final year students,were still writing their last few papers at school block. SS3 students dispersed themselves all over the refectory and that factor had me standing at the middle of the refectory and scanning everywhere in my search for Daryl.
Spotting him leaning against a pillar beside SS3 row with Temi beside him,I made my way towards him,adjusting my school bag over shoulders as I did. "Daryl" I called the minute I reached them,earning both their attentions and if it was possible,my gaze would have bore holes through his forehead already.
"Yeah" he replied,turning to me,his lips curling into a smile as he spotted me. "What's up?" He asked. I glared at him for a while,I hated myself for wanting to give him the benefit of doubt,I hated the fact that seeing that smile of his made me want to forget my anger behind.
"We need to talk" I told him sternly,folding my arms beneath my bosom. "Did something happen? Are you okay?" He questioned,his expressions growing serious as he detected the seriousness of my tone.
"Yes,as a matter of fact,something did happen!" I fired at him. He observed me for a while,like he was trying to read my mind before turning to Temi. "I'm coming" he told Temi before turning back to me. I simply turned and walked out the backdoor of the refectory,expecting that he'd followed behind me.
I stopped when I realised I'd come far enough before turning back to him again. "Kainene,what's wrong? Did I do something?" Daryl questioned with a panic laced tone.
"What am I to you Daryl?" I questioned rather lowly,still trying to hold back the anger in me. He stilled for a moment or two,probably taken aback by my question.
"Since you can't reply,maybe I should be the one to tell you" I gave off a dry laugh. "Maybe...say...a toy or a game or a conquest.." I chuckled,anger creeping more into my veins as I watched him.
"Wait,I dont understand...." he started,his brows furrowing in confusion. "...How?..Why? Why would you even think that?" He questioned.
"So do I Daryl! I dont understand so please make me! I'm lost...I'm so...urgh!!!!" I exclaimed,grasping my head at my feeling a heavy pang in it. My emotions were wrecked and so were my nerves.
"Kainene please just calm down and tell me what's wrong" he started,attempting to grasp my hands. "Dont touch me!!" I yelled,throwing his hands away from me. "Dont you dare lay a finger on me Daryl" I fumed,finally letting my anger lose.
"Please just explain to me why you're so angry,I never said any of that and I would never" he insisted,still taking hold of my now trembling shoulders. My body shook even more at his touch,agitating me even more.
"I said leave me alone!!"I yelled atop my lungs,shrugging his hands off and shoving him against his chest. Even as he stumbled backwards,more anger seemed to build in me. The guts of him! Red seemed to had covered my vision as every vein in me shuddered,my breath growing hot and heat impeaching every sector of my skin.
"I'm sorry...I won't" he breathed heavily,taking a step away from me and holding his hands up. "It was a game from the start Daryl! I was a freaking game to you! Or you thought I would never find out?!" I fired at him, a cackle following my question.
I watched as blood drained out of his face and he went pale. "You're not going to say anything?" I questioned with a sinister smile even though I was starting to feel like someone was jabbing a nail into my chest. "Say something Daryl!" I yelled over my voice.
"Oh God!" I exclaimed,clasping my hands against the bridge of my nose as I looked away,shutting my lids as well,even my eyelids seemed to be twitching with anger. "You should at least deny it" I muttered under my breath before opening my eyes and turning back to him.
"You should at least try and deny it! Tell me it's a lie Daryl!" I yelled,my heart breaking into a million pieces as I watched his distraught figure,gaze darted to the ground. "Tell me you didnt place a bet on me! Tell me I heard wrong!" I yelled at him.
I scoffed as I got no reply before stepping back. "Ten thousand naira,is that really my worth?" I questioned under my breath,running my hands through my hair. "So it was all fake,I'd been a bet all along...All the time..the words...all the.." he cut through my pained lamentation.
"No it wasn't Kainene. The bet was ages ago. I can explain,I can..." He started but I wasnt going to have it. "I dont want your stupid explanation Daryl! You cant even deny it,that means it's true. I don't need any more lies from you!" I yelled,my voice dropping octaves as tears started to brim beneath my orbs. No,there was no way I was going to cry.
"I know you wont believe me,but I meant everything Kainene...I..." I was quick to cut him off. "Yes you did mean everything. You played me to the very end...and I was stupidly playing along" I muttered the last words under the breath.
"Kainene...I didn't...I..." he stuttered,probably unsure of what to say. "I don't know why I'm not even shocked" I laughed dryly. "Kainene just let me..." I stopped him. "Stop!!" I yelled,feeling another pang in my brain as I was now fighting the tears that threatened to fall as well as my emotions which were running haywire. "Just stop! Stop!!" I yelled again,my voice beginning to crack.
"Kainene I'm sorry...I..." I was quick to shut him up again. "I said stop! Dont ever call my name again Daryl,format my name from your memory" I snapped at him. "I hate you more than anything Daryl! I hate you so much!!" I yelled,even in my attempts to not break down before him. He couldn't have the last laugh.
"I wish I never knew you..." I trailed off,my breathing becoming another thing i seemed to be struggling with. "I hope this will be the last time we breath the same oxygen" I fumed,before turning on my heels.
"I'm sorry,I'm really really sorry Kainene. It's all my fault,please." he took hold of my hand,stopping me before I could brush past him. "I'm holding back from slapping you Daryl,so leave me alone" I breathed heavily,salty puddles beginning to form over my orbs again so my vision blurred and I averted my gaze to the floor.
"You can do it,do anything you want because I deserve it. I'll take it all. Hit me a million times and I'll take it all just please..." he trailed off,his own voice growing weak as well. "....please give me a chance to explain." He pleaded,and if I didnt know better,I would be melted at the degree of desperacy his voice contained.
"Fuck off Daryl,go to hell" I sniffed lowly,a tear finally escaping and wetting the floor before I fiercely shrugged his hold off my wrist and without sparing him a glance,stormed back into the refectory.
My cranial and cardiac systems seemed to be competing for who would destroy me first,each setting its blasting pound against me in motion.My body shook, with every nerve in me trembling,how could I have been so stupid?
"Kainene!" Temi stopped me before I could walk out of the refectory. "Did you know about it? Please tell me you didn't" I pleaded as he took hold of my hand,my orbs darted to the floor.
"Kainene I...its.." I finally looked up at him. "Even you too,even you Temi" I told him,before bringing my second hand to shrug off his hold before storming out of the refectory.
***
I'd completely lost my appetite for any form of food,I skipped lunch and went straight to hostel from my hideout which was the school chapel. My heart ripped into more pieces with every passing second,I'd reached a very high apex of depression.
I threw my school shoes to a side of my corner the minute I got into hostel,laying down and cradling myself on my bed as I stared into blankspace. The hurt had so much sank into me that I almost felt numb. I was just a bet in the long run,I was a game.
My heart throbbed with pain each time the words whisked past my mind. "Kainene" I heard Onome's subtle call as she dropped her bag on her bed and made her way to my corner.
"Are you okay?" She questioned lowly,crouching down beside me. I didnt bother to give her an answer because I knew it would only bring out the tears I was trying to keep at bay.
"Temi told us what happened" she told me again as I cuddled myself even tighter. "I was a game Onome,I was just a game" I whispered to her after a long period of hesitance,a hot tear finally escaping my left orb,rolling down the bridge of my nose.
"Its okay Kaine" she whispered,brushing the tear off my face,taking my hand and making me seat up. "I can't believe I was almost taking him serious....I..." my words got stuck in my throat as the tears finally came down over my face.
"Its okay to cry Kainene,just let it out" she told me,taking a seat on my bed and bringing my head to rest over my shoulder. "I'm just like her Onome,I'm a fool." I whispered lowly admist my tears.
"You're different Kaine,very different" she told me but her words did nothing to stop my tears. The emotions I'd tried to take through the past hours finally surfaced as I shuddered against her,letting out a mixture of sobs and wails. "Let it out,its better to cry it out" she kept soothing,knowing fully well how much I hated tears,how miserable I felt whenever I cried. I felt like I'd lost to the world.
My tears seemed unstoppable,I thought I was stronger than this,I'd deemed myself stronger than this. But I guess I was wrong again. I was neither smart nor strong.
Onome plugged her music pods into my ears,one which she always managed to snuggle in due to her love for music,after minutes of crying over her shoulder. She sat beside me,running her fingers over my hair as I lay,still staring into blankspace,tears streaking my cheeks every now and then and wetting my pillowcase.
It didnt matter,mid-term break would commence tomorrow anyway. Usually,the thought of returning home appalled me but today,it seemed to be my solace. I itched to get out of this space,away from this pain and ache.
~•~
Don't tell me you're sorry cuz you're not
Baby cuz I know you're only sorry you got caught
But you put on quite a show,really had me going
Now it's time to go,curtains finally closing
That was quite a show,very entertaining
But it's over now
Go on and take a bow
Ohh,and the award for the best liar goes to you
For making me believe that you could be faithful to me,let's hear your speech now
How about around of applause
Standing ovation...cuz you put on quite a show..
~•~
Merely listening to the words of the song playing in my ears made me feel like Rihanna had read my exact emotions when she wrote it. My heart ached and my breath ragged even more. Burying my face into my pillow,I cried my heart out,my shudders taking off from where they'd left me.
Shawn Mendes seemed to understand too,I might as well be needing stitches. But then,why was I so hurt?
Woah,I didnt believe I'd actually finish this today. I dont know,I wanted this chapter to be better than this but it came out a bit too shabby for my liking. Either ways,please do vote and comment guys!
-Who is on Daryl's side?
-Who understand why Kainene is so sad?
-Should Kainene move on? Is her hurt justified?
Leave your answers in that comment box🤗. Thank you guys! Lots of love🤗💕.