"Why are we not back yet?" I asked through my tears after I've realized we've driven through the same block for, at least, the third time.
"Do you really want to?" Michael asked from the driver's seat and looked at me from the rearview mirror. As soon as I noticed, I averted my gaze, not wanting him to see my puffy red face.
"What?"
"Do you really want me to take you back to the penthouse?" he repeated his question and turned his gaze back to the road as the car moved forward after the lights changed green.
"Yes? Where else would I want to go?"
"Back where we came from?" and though it sounded like a question, it was clear he was sure of what he said, having no doubt in his voice as he spoke.
"Why on earth would I want to go back there? It's pointless,"
"You know that's not true,"
"Of course it is," I sighed, "I didn't want to third wheel and I don't exactly have anywhere else to go,"
"You say it as if you were intruding,"
"Wasn't I?" I countered, "You saw they were all over each other. My presence was clearly not wanted. Not that I care. Lisa can do whatever the fuck she wants,"
"I don't know why you're trying to convince me of that if you, yourself, don't believe it,"
"What?" I scoffed, "I really don't care. She is a free woman, she can do whatever she wants. I just know when I'm not welcome anymore. I came for help, got it, and it was clearly time for me to go. Simple as that,"
"Do you really see it that way?" he countered knowingly, not taking his eyes off the road and instead piercing me with his voice.
"What do you mean?" I sniffled and chuckled right after to mask the sound, though it was pointless because even if I sat in the back seat this time around, I was pretty sure he knew I was crying.
"I don't think she wanted you to leave,"
"And how would you know that, huh?" I asked, a little annoyed because truthfully, I didn't particularly like the flow of our current conversation.
"The way she grabbed you was a dead giveaway, not to mention she kept refusing the other woman's advances,"
"Yeah, right," I scoffed, "If pulling her closer is rejecting her, then sure, totally rejected. Why are we even talking about this? I told you, I don't care,"
"Clearly," he shook his head, and I cocked my brow at the motion.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked accusingly.
"Nothing," he shrugged.
"No," I shook my head and leaned forward in my seat, no longer caring about my appearance, "What did you mean, huh? Do you think I care about her? I'm married in case you failed to notice,"
"Oh yeah, I noticed. The bruises and pain in your eyes too," he retorted sharply, and my breath hitched.
"W-what?"
"You might think you're fooling everyone, but you're not. Everyone who pays attention can see you're not happy Chaeyoung,"
"Bullshit," I snapped.
"Oh, yeah?" he stopped the car at the side of the road, undid his seatbelt with a click, and turned around, his eyes piercing through mine, "Why are you crying then, huh? Because you don't care?"
"That's none of your business," I muttered, wiping the tears that escaped my eyes, sliding against my hollowed cheeks.
"Maybe not," he admitted, "but I care about you,"
"Never asked you to,"
"You didn't have to. Friends care without having to be asked,"
"Who says we're friends?" I countered sharply.
"I do, and whether or not you like it, I care about you, Chaeyoung. You seriously need to drop this tough act like you don't care about anything because clearly, you're hurting and by pushing everyone away you're only making everything worse for yourself,"
"You don't know what you're talking about. I'm perfectly fine,"
"You're not though. Look, you don't have to do shit I say, but if I can give you advice-"
"You can't,"
"You need to start letting people in, otherwise you'll be all alone with that dick you have for a husband torturing you and holding you captive as if you were a prisoner,"
"Chanyeol is a good husband," my voice was weak as I spoke probably the biggest lie anyone ever has.
"Yeah and I turn into a tooth fairy at midnight. Cut the crap, Chaeyoung,"
"What the fuck do you know?! Huh?! You think you can tell me how to live my life? You think you have the right to just because I talk to you once in a while? Because you don't, you fucking don't and you have no idea what my life is like, so shut up!"
"Oh, I do. I know you're not living. This," he motioned up and down with his hands outstretched in my direction, "this is not living and it most certainly isn't a life. You're sneaking out of your own house, you have a new bruise every day like that bastard doesn't even try to hide, he hurts you anymore for gods' sake. My dog has more freedom than you, so why are you pretending like everything is perfect? Huh? Why? Give me one good reason why you're-"
"What else can I do?! I can either pretend I'm fine or completely lose it!"
"Or you can be with the person who makes you genuinely happy!"
"Yeah?" I snarled, "And who's that?"
"Lisa,"
"Oh yeah, right, forgot about the girl who's fucking around and bringing every girl she sees home. My bad,"
Michael shook his head in frustration at my statement and I leaned further into my seat, arms crossed against my chest in defiance, "You know she's not like that,"
"Do I though? You have no idea what kind of person she is,"
"Right now, I feel like I know her better than you do,"
"What makes you think that?"
"You're so blinded by sadness and pain and anger that you refuse to see what is so incredibly clear. Lisa is like the most translucent person I have ever met. She loves you, Chaeyoung, and if you can't see that, I don't know what to tell you,"
"Yeah, right," I scoffed and turned my head to the side, hoping he'd just stop talking already and leave me the fuck alone.
"Alright, let's say she doesn't then," Michael conceded, "Why else would she drop everything just to be with you then? Why would she come back that night after everything went to shit? Why would she give you a phone when you no longer have yours, and why would she help you hack into Chanyeol's? Why else would she offer for you to stay there? Hell, why do you think she looks at you like that?"
"She doesn't look at me in any way,"
"Please, she wears her heart on her sleeve. It's beyond obvious, you're the only one who doesn't see it,"
"Why did she almost fuck Sooyoung then, huh? If she, oh, so loves me?"
"She literally pushed her away several times,"
"Yeah right. I know what I saw,"
"And yet you're ignoring it. You're only focusing on this one thing because when things get too hard or too personal you run, am I not right? When things get serious and there's a chance you might get hurt, you turn around and run like a coward,"
"What else am I supposed to do, huh? I'm married to him. I can't hold on to her and hold her back,"
"That's her choice, not yours. You keep hurting each other, and yet you always come back to one another, why do you think that is?"
This time, I didn't have an answer and so, in lieu of opening my mouth and saying something, I shrugged. It was strange, but it was true. No matter what happened between the two of us, somehow we always seemed to cross paths, even if we tried to avoid one another. Almost as if we were tied by an invisible string that kept shortening. As if our destiny was entwined, falling into one. As if our very own existence depended on the other.
And no matter how far I tried to run, how hard I tried to hide, she would always find me. Just like I would always find her. Two souls lost in a world where we could only see each other; two beacons in the vast ocean, sending light signals to one another in hopes we'd no longer be alone; two incomplete parts, only making sense upon coming together; the sun to my moon.
"Because you're beautiful and I never want to forget the way you look at the stars like you're not aware that you shine brighter."
Her words rang in my memory, and though I tried to push back my tears, a few managed to escape, tinting my cheeks with wet streaks.
I wondered if she still meant it, whether I still shone brighter, though I knew the answer. Of course, I haven't. Not anymore at least, and not back then either. She always saw more in me than was ever there in the first place. Lisa had far too much hope in me, in us, that kind of hope I didn't deserve; that no one did. She was selfless, but she was naïve to believe I would stay. Because people are bound to hurt each other, and I did.
She should've left me alone when I asked her to, but no, that idiot had to keep on asking me stupid questions like whether I ever did grass angels. Like that was even a thing. No, that dumbass had to make me fall for her just so I could break both our hearts. And now it was happening all over again. Because no matter how much I tried to distance myself from the woman, the invisible string tying us together would always pull us back together until we would crash and collide, creating a disaster.
A beautiful explosion of colors, bursting in all directions, coating everything in light, turning into darkness upon touch. We were beautiful until we weren't. We were perfect, until color turned into darkness, leaving a cold, empty cell in its wake, with no trace of light. Crash and collide, we did, but why did we always have to go out in flames? Why did the dark smoke have to fill our lungs afterward, suffocating us both? Because it wasn't meant to be, we never were. Twin flames, soulmates, neither of the words described what we had, however, tainted love did. Tragic, yet beautiful... until it wasn't. Until we could no longer come back to one another. Until it was time to say goodbye forever.
"I love her," I whispered, "I love her so much,"
"I know you do, but she doesn't. You need to tell her, Chaeyoung. You have to stop running from the inevitable,"
Shaking my head, I wiped at my eyes that wouldn't stop shedding tears, falling down my cheeks, neck, and disappearing under my clothes, "What if she doesn't feel the same? What if she doesn't want me?"
"She loves you, there is no doubt about it,"
"You really think so?"
"I know so," he smiled gently and reached forward, wiping my tears for me with his thumb, "Let me take you back,"
"Okay," I muttered.
"Yeah?" his smile widened, making me smile as well.
"Yeah,"
He made a move to turn back around, but before he could, I stopped him by holding his arm, causing him to look over his shoulder questioningly, "I'm sorry," I apologized sincerely, "I shouldn't have said the things I did. I care about you and you're one of the few friends I have,"
"I know," he grinned broadly, "Don't worry about it, okay? We all have our moments. You just needed someone to ground you and bring you back to reality,"
"You're a really good friend," I stated earnestly.
"Once again, I know," he winked, making me chuckle through my tears as I let go of his arm and he turned back around.
"Thank you for not taking me back," I said as he pulled out on the road again, and though I couldn't see him anymore, I could hear the smile in his voice.
"You're welcome,"
...
The door swung open and before I got a chance to make any kind of sound, a pair of strong arms pulled me into a tight hug. And without giving it a second thought, mine wrapped around her neck, pulling her impossibly closer and inhaling her scent.
"I'm sorry,"
"Shh,"
"I'm so sorry, Lisa," I choked out.
"It's okay. You're here now," her hand moved to the back of my head, pulling me into her and I didn't even attempt to stop myself from kissing the side of her neck softly.
We could've been standing there for a few minutes or a few hours, or maybe time went still, letting us enjoy the moment to its full extent. Maybe the cars outside stopped moving, airplanes went still mid air, water stopped flowing, and the earth stopped spinning. Maybe, just maybe, this moment was ours entirely.
Her arms around me felt safe, warm, calming. Like a sunny meadow in the middle of a scary forest casting intimidating shadows where the light didn't shine. A beautiful lily flower in a thicket, hidden away but protruding strongly. My peace of heaven in what felt like the deepest, darkest depths of hell. My silence in a loud room. My Lisa.
"I will not turn away again, I promise," and this time I was positive I made a promise I would not break. Because this time, I was sure I'd rather break me, break him, break the world, than her heart.
Pulling back, her palms cupped my cheeks and her head tipped forward, capturing my lips in between hers, softly caressing them with her touch, spreading sparks through my body. I was like a sparkler, better yet; a firework, on the fourth of July, whenever our skin touched and I could feel her under my fingertips.
Nails scraping the sides of her neck, arms wrapping around her neck, chest pressed closer as I kissed her. My lips seeking hers in desperate need of assurance, needing her to speak the words I so wretchedly needed to hear, conveyed through the lip lock. I wanted to tell her then, wanted her to know the secret I've been carrying within my heart for so long, but couldn't. I was still too scared, and so instead of speaking them verbally, I made sure she could feel them as I kissed her to the best of my abilities, hoping she heard the silent three words.
So when she pulled away, I didn't let her, crashing my lips against hers again. My fingers tangled in her hair as I pulled her head closer, tilting mine to the side as I probed her lips with my tongue, seeking entrance. Without meeting any resistance, she gave me access, and I slipped my tongue inside, meeting hers in a heated kiss.
One of her hands slid back down to my waist as she pushed me into the door and without giving it a second thought, I jumped up, wrapping my legs around her waist. Her hands moved down instantly, holding me under my thighs and keeping me up as she kissed me hungrily.
She sucked on my tongue suddenly, making me moan into her mouth, and I felt her grin at the sound as she pushed herself further into me, our bodies almost becoming one. Her lips detached themselves from mine and I was about to protests, but then they connected with my jaw, and the complaint died in my throat.
Tugging on her hair, I tilted my head to the side to give the raven better access as she moved her kisses down my neck, nibbling on the skin, sucking and biting, only to soothe it with her tongue afterward. And I couldn't stop another moan when she sucked on my sweet spot at the base of my neck.
"Lisa," her hands squeezed my thighs and lips sucked on the skin below my ear simultaneously, before moving up and taking my earlobe between her lips, making me shudder, "Take me to your bed,"
"Are you sure?" she pulled away, with concern etched in her face.
Leaning down, I captured her lips again, softer this time, as I mumbled against the pink flesh, "I'm sure," and it was true. I was never more sure about anything. I wanted this. Wanted her. Needed her.
My lips attached themselves to her neck, making her groan as she steered us in the direction of the bedroom, almost stumbling a few times. And though I was acutely aware, I was making the task harder; I haven't stopped my assault on her neck and her jaw. However, it was when I nibbled on her earlobe that we nearly tumbled to the ground, making me chuckle and pecking her neck, letting her navigate us to the bed safely.
Upon reaching the desired destination, she gently laid me down, and I wasted no time scooting to the headboard, pulling on the collar of her shirt to move her with me. When we were both comfortable, Lisa propped herself on her hands between my legs and I brought our mouths together again, pulling her impossibly closer, twisting my fingers in her hair.
Moving my lips to the corner of her mouth, I kissed a line down her neck, placing a few kisses on her collarbones before I no longer could, skin hidden by the black shirt, "Take it off," I pleaded and Lisa sat back on her heels, pulling the shirt over her head. And I couldn't help myself but admire the way her muscles flexed as she moved and lick my lips subconsciously because she just looked so damn good.
"Take a picture, it'll last longer," she smirked, and I shook my head in amusement before pulling her down on top of me again, capturing her lips that I have already begun to miss.
Lisa's free hand moved to the hem of my shirt, slowly slipping under the fabric. The contact was electric, and I shuddered as she dragged her nails along the skin, leaving gooseflesh wherever she made contact.
One of my hands pulled at the roots of her hair, while the other moved down her back, tracing the tattoo between her shoulder blades, and scraping her skin, not hard enough to leave a mark though. Not yet, at least. And though I felt her hand tentatively moving higher, I made no move to stop her. Lisa did though, as she pulled her mouth away from mine to look at me as she reached the bottom of my bra.
"It's okay," I smiled assuringly and kissed her again because she didn't look too convinced, "I promise,"
Her hand moved carefully until she cupped my breast in her palm through my bra and I groaned at the contact because, despite the fabric being in the way, it still felt so good to be touched gently. Though I wished it wasn't there to act as a barricade between the skin on skin contact I so desperately wanted.
Seeing as Lisa was hesitant, I pushed on her shoulders, getting her off me and earning a look of both concern and confusion. Before she could say anything though, I pulled off my own shirt, throwing it somewhere to the side carelessly and pulling her back on top of me again, lips enveloping hers, tongue entwining with her own.
After a few careful touches, Lisa's lips detached themselves from my own, moving down the column of my neck and to my collarbones. Her hands kept caressing my sides, nails scraping the skin occasionally, successfully making me tremble each time, which she clearly enjoyed by the sly smile I felt against my skin.
Her kisses moved lower to the top of my breasts, exposed by my bra and kissing every inch of skin available. And I wished she would remove it already, "Please," I breathed, my chest already heaving and breathing becoming heavier with lust, "Take it off,"
With a curt nod, she reached under my already arched back, undoing the clasp with ease and looking into my eyes for confirmation before pulling the undergarment off, the straps sliding down my arms, before she tossed it to the ground, somewhere joining my shirt. For a minute she just stared and truthfully, I was becoming more than a little self-conscious. However, when I moved my arms to cover my exposed breasts, her hands stopped me, "You're beautiful," she confessed breathlessly, her eyes almost shining with honesty and admiration as if she didn't even believe I was real.
"So are you," I whispered, causing her to meet my eyes with that same tender look in her eyes that never failed to make my heart race and fill my stomach with butterflies.
She lowered herself down, lips meeting mine in a much softer and gentler kiss than the ones before, as if she was scared I'd break under pressure. And as we continued kissing, speaking the words we were too afraid to voice, her fingers trailed up my ribcage, finally palming my bare breast in her warm hand.
Whining at the contact, I arched my back into her, pressing my chest into her hand as she kneaded it softly, fingers purposefully avoiding my nipple. Her lips left mine once more, as she made her way down to my chest, and I didn't even attempt to stop a moan from tearing through my throat as she kissed around the stiff peak before sucking it between her luscious lips.
The contact felt heavenly and my hands pushed her head against my chest forcefully, needing to feel more of her mouth on my skin, teasing me, kissing me, licking, and biting. And Lisa complied. Her other hand massaging the other mound, circling the sensitive nub with her thumb, while she sucked on the other gently, before biting down, making me moan her name.
Pleasure mixed with pain every time her teeth grazed my sensitive flesh. But I loved it. Especially when she soothed the skin with her tongue afterward. I didn't have to look to know there were several red marks forming all across my chest, as if she was marking me as hers. Although I knew that wasn't what was going on, I let myself be immersed in the feeling and fantasies. Perhaps she wanted me to be hers. That perhaps, she was marking me so I could never forget her again.
It was only when her chest brushed against my skin as she moved did I realize Lisa still had her bra on. And though her ministrations felt incredible, I needed to feel her. I needed to feel her skin against mine, with nothing standing between us. Needed to remind myself of what it felt like before everything went to shit and all I felt was rough skin brushing against mine as he'd touch me. And as soon as I remembered the older man, I knew it wasn't just a need, but an urge to feel her. Something to remind me I was safe, that it was truly her who was holding me close. Not his strong hands pinning me down so I wouldn't squirm out of his hold.
"Lisa," I whimpered as she sucked on my nipple harshly, and tugged on her head so she'd come up, needing to see her gentle eyes; needing the reassurance.
And as if she could tell what was going on in my mind, she leaned down, brushing her nose against mine, causing my eyes to flutter close as I exhaled heavily, "I'm right here," her lips hovered over mine, her breath hitting my skin as she whispered the words of reassurance before she kissed me softly once again. And naturally, I let her.
As we started kissing again, my hands slid up her ribcage, slipping under the bust band of her bra, hoping she would understand. Her lips parted from mine for a brief moment as she reached for the bust band herself, tugging the undergarment off, and lowering herself back on top of me. As she kissed me again, I felt her nipples brush against mine. Finally, I could feel her on me and I released the breath I didn't realize I was even holding.
Though kissing her like this, feeling up her back, her sides and every inch of her exposed body felt amazing, I couldn't wait anymore. Sliding my hands down her front, I fiddled with the button of her jeans, but Lisa stopped me by placing her hands on top of my own before I could pop it open. Her eyes searched mine, clearly unsure of the direction this was going, and I smiled, nodding my head slightly, hoping she would know how I felt. Hoping she would understand just how much I needed this.
She seemed to as she let me unbutton her pants as she kissed me again, and once I popped the button she leaned back again, taking her pants off completely, leaving her only in her panties. As if she sensed the urgency in my touch, she kissed down my body, letting her lips graze every spot on my imperfect body; kissing every fresh and fading bruise, every scar. And I felt myself tear up as I watched her moving down, the same tender look in her eyes as if I was the most precious thing she's ever seen.
When her lips reached my waist, my jeans in the way of her mapping of my body, she popped the button the same way I did hers mere minutes ago. Slowly, she peeled them off my legs, her lips returning to my skin and kissing every inch of newly exposed skin until she tugged them off over my ankles and tossed them somewhere behind her.
Her nails scraped the sides of my legs until her hands arrived at my underwear, making me shudder in anticipation but also mild anxiety that started building up as soon as her face was out of view. She leaned down, kissing my thighs, and all around the waistband of the last piece of fabric I had on before looking back up with a gentle look in her eyes, "Are you sure about this?" she whispered, her warm breath hitting my most intimate part through the soaked fabric of my underwear.
"I'm sure," I nodded, my heart hammering in my chest furiously.
Lisa's fingers hooked themselves under the waistband as she slowly began peeling it off, her eyes not leaving mine for even the briefest moment. And I was beyond grateful for that, seeing as I needed the constant assurance it was her I was completely surrendering myself to.
Once she pulled it over my ankles, discarding it somewhere on the ground, she moved back up, her lips once again kissing my thighs, making me squirm. I was sure if she continued this for any longer I would come on the spot merely from the teasing, even though I was sure she wouldn't consider it that.
But then I felt her breath on my mound as her head dipped lower, placing a soft kiss just above my clit, and I panicked. I felt my eyes bulge as unwanted memories filled my mind, "No," I whispered weakly, tears filling my eyes as I shook my head against her soft pillows, "Please, don't," I cried softly.
Immediately, I felt her pull away and before I knew it, her face was in front of mine, her hand cupping my cheek softly, "I'm right here, Rosie. It's just me," she leaned her forehead on mine, her thumb stroking my cheek, catching my tears in their track, "I'm not going to hurt you. I promise,"
"C-can you," I sniffled, my mind and body relaxing at the close proximity and gentle, loving almost, touch. She could've fooled me.
"Yeah?" she prompted.
"Can you stay up here?" I begged, my eyes opening to meet hers, twinkling in the faint light, shining in concern and what seemed like regret.
Nodding her head against mine, she brushed her nose against mine, "Of course," and kissed me gently, her lips barely making contact with mine.
Once I calmed completely after a few minutes of us just kissing, her hand snaked between our bodies, slowly trailing down to my mound. And though panic started rising within me again, I let her because this time I could see her, and I was sure it was her. I was sure I was safe, and I knew I needed this. Needed to remind myself what it felt like to be made feel loved, to give myself up to the one I loved unconditionally. Needed to remind myself what it felt like when you were touched with tenderness instead of roughness.
Her fingers drew circles around the sensitive bundle of nerves, gathering wetness on their way and spreading it all around, making me whine softly into her mouth that hasn't left mine once. But once she flicked my clit, my lips detached from hers as I threw my head back with a moan tearing through. Using this opportunity to her advantage, Lisa dipped her head lower, kissing and nibbling my neck softly as her fingers kept playing with my most intimate part.
But when I felt a single-digit press against my entrance, my hand shot down to hers, fingers clasping around her wrist and stopping her before she could slip inside. Her confused eyes met mine, and I shook my head, "Don't... can you..."
I struggled to speak but before I could get the words out, she nodded with a small smile, clearly understanding what I needed and withdrawing her finger and returning to the outside of my mound, "I won't," she kissed me again, her fingers caressing my lower lips, my clit, my slit, but not once slipping inside.
My fingers dug into her flesh as I arched off the bed, moaning her name repeatedly, whimpering, and mewling as she worked me up, her lips either on mine or on my neck, kissing wherever she could reach. And as much as I enjoyed this, as I felt myself teetering over the edge, I realized I didn't want this. Not like this.
"Wait," I breathed, her hand retreating immediately, "Stop,"
"Okay," she kissed me and made a move to get off me, clearly misunderstanding.
"Wait, no," I reached for her, keeping her in place, her brows furrowing in confusion as she met my eyes, "Can you... take these off?" I slipped my hand lower, tugging on the waistband of her underwear, "I want to feel you,"
"Okay," she conceded, taking off her underwear rather eagerly, making me smile at the knowledge she wanted this as much as I did.
Spreading my legs further, she positioned herself so that we were lined up, and before she moved, her eyes sought mine again. This time I pulled her head down, kissing her fervently, urgently, hungrily, and desperately. That seemed to be all the confirmation she needed as she pressed herself against me, the pressure making me tip my head back with a loud moan. And so did Lisas as she groaned in pleasure.
My nails dug into her back as she thrusted her body against mine, the delicious friction sending a bolt of pleasure through my entire body, making it tingle. And as she kept moving, I felt complete. Absolutely complete, filled to the brim with love and adoration for the woman who was heaving on top of me, her breath hitting my face, forehead pressed against mine.
I felt her, all of her. Our bodies became one, and I couldn't be happier. It was illegal how good this felt, having her like this, so close yet not close enough. I realized now that no matter how pressed up we would be against each other, it would never be enough. I could never get enough of her, of her warmth, of everything she was. But I let myself enjoy it, let myself pull on her back, tugging her impossibly closer than her heavy breaths mingled with moans and groans filled my ears.
Our clits brushed against each other, perfectly aligned and I screamed her name because fuck, it felt too good. If that happened a few more times, I was sure I'd climax in no time. And Lisa seemed to feel the same as her eyebrows furrowed in a mix of concentration and pleasure. One of my hands moved lower, cupping her buttocks and pushing her against me as I kept moaning loudly, nearing my orgasm, as her clit kept pressing against mine repeatedly.
"Don't stop," I pleaded, "Oh God! Please don't stop,"
"I won't. I'm so close," she moaned, picking up her pace and going even faster than I thought was possible.
"Me too," I arched my back, pressing my pelvis into her, seeking more pressure as I was just on edge of coming undone beneath her.
And after a few more thrusts and loud moans, my back arched in a perfect bow shape, a loud scream tearing through my throat as I came, Lisa following only seconds after with a loud moan of my name. We panted against each other's lips, hips not stilling as we rode out our orgasms, whimpering still.
As soon as we caught our breaths, though, our lips came crashing together, hands caressing each other's bodies slick with sweat. Suddenly Lisa pulled away and before I could pull her back, her thumb swiped against my cheek, wiping the tear I didn't even notice escaped, "Why are you crying?" she asked, concern etched in her face.
Shaking my head, I chuckled through my tears, averting my eyes from hers, and looking to the side instead. But Lisa didn't let me and placed her index finger under my chin, making me look at her, "Rosie? Are you okay? Did I do something wrong? Is-"
Before she could worry any more, I pushed myself off the bed, lips colliding with hers, hands moving to her hair. I was overjoyed; I was happy, and I was utterly in love with the woman above me. They weren't tears of sadness, but tears of happiness, of relief.
She didn't know just how much I needed to feel like this; appreciated and loved. How much I needed to be touched gently, like my life was actually worth something. No, Lisa had no idea just how much I needed for her to look at me like that, with the same look in her eyes I kept seeing over and over in my nightmares. She didn't know just how incredibly happy she made me.
So when she pulled away again, the same concern in her eyes as she wiped my tears, I smiled, my lips trembling, and spoke without thinking, "I love you,"
And before I could regret my words, her lips pressed against mine, and I felt her smile, "I love you too, Rosie,"
Maybe I was wrong. Tainted love, twin flames, soulmates, whatever we were. Maybe it was meant to be like this. Perhaps we were meant to be. Perhaps Lisa wasn't just my past, but my present, and my future.
But when she pulled away moments later, speaking the words I didn't even realize I so badly needed to hear, more tears sprung into my eyes. I was no longer guessing. I was sure. This wasn't a perhaps or a maybe. I was hers and she was mine, and that's how it would always be.
"Welcome home,"