Published on 25.03.2021
● A A R O H I ●
I envy men. I really do. They have so many things easier for them that we don't. They don't have to spend time making themselves look presentable while we girls have to be so cautious. There are so many things that needs to be taken care of. Well one may argue that it comes with the advantage of looking pretty and beautiful, to adorn yourself in so many fancy items but that doesn't make me feel any better. I was never the one who liked dressing up, investing your time in doing your hair and makeup and I hated shopping. Sometimes I feel that I was meant to be a boy but due to an error by God, I ended up being born as a girl.
Not to forget the most painful things that we've to endure; periods and pregnancy. It's unfair, terribly unfair. At least there should've been a division of work here between men and women. One could bear periods while other could've been pregnant. But nope, these two are also interrelated. And then people have the audacity to say women are weak and can't bear pain.
Right now, everything sucks for me. I'm on my dates and if that wasn't enough now I've to go for the wedding shopping with our families when I just want to lie down on my bed with a hot water bag over my abdomen. Period cramps suck like a bitch!
I put on an olive green jumpsuit which was sleeveless and had a round neck. Pulling my hair up in a pony tail and applying some lip gloss and eyeliner I was done. I grabbed my purse and phone and left the apartment.
Armaan was already waiting for me outside the gate in his car, so I quickly sat on the passenger seat when he opened the door. We had two cars, one belonged to our father and the other one to my brother. Papa had offered to get a car for me after I got my driving license but I refused since I want to have my own car with my own money.
"Didi," Armaan called out poking his finger on my arm. I didn't turn.
"You still mad at me?" I didn't answer.
"Come on Didi. Forget what happened. Move on now." He cribbed.
"You lied to me." I stated.
"I didn't." He whined. "I just didn't tell you the truth."
"Means the same. Let's get moving now."
"No! We won't leave until you forgive me. You haven't even seen my messages where I've apologized. I'm sorry. Please." He made a puppy face and held his ears.
"Don't make that face!" I grimaced. "You look creepy."
"Hey don't say that," he said being offended. "Riya says I look cute and she couldn't resist me whenever I made that face." He said coyly.
I scrunched my nose. "I always knew that the girl lacked taste. Otherwise who in the right sense would go for a nuisance like you. And now it's officially proved."
"That's mean Di."
I shrugged. "Now. Drive."
"I won't." He crossed his arms over his chest.
Drama queen.
"So stay here. You know I anyways hate shopping." I folded my legs on my lap and started the FM radio.
"Arey yaar," he said tiredly rubbing his forehead. "Please please pleaseeee forgive me. I'll never ever do anything of this sort again. I promise." He even folded his hands begging me to forgive him. Oh my my! This is too much fun.
"I won't." I shook my head in a no.
"So what should I do? KFC?" He asked hopefully.
I shook my head.
"McDonalds?"
I again shook my head.
He sighed. "Domino's?"
I looked at him with the corner of my eyes. "With your money?"
He nodded slowly.
I turned to face him. "Anything that I want even if it's the most expensive?"
He nodded hesitantly.
"And you'll sit with me and watch me while I gobble down the delicious pizza and you don't even get a slice?" I asked excitedly.
He glared at me pursing his lips before nodding in a yes.
"Lovely! Then we're sorted." I clapped my hands happily. "What are you waiting for? Let's go driver."
We reached the boutique in about 20 minutes. The only part of visiting that I liked was I'll be in an air conditioned room the whole time. I looked around only to find that everyone was already present there. Vihaan and my parents and there were two other girls as well. Vihaan was wearing a faded shirt with black jeans. The casual look made him look younger. His hair wasn't perfectly set and I kinda liked it more that way.
Armaan and I made our way towards them. Honestly, I was feeling a little guilty that because of me acting too pricey for forgiving Armaan, everyone had to wait. But that didn't change the fact that I would prefer to be alone in my bed rather than being here.
My mother, Mrs Rachna Sharma was looking at me dangerously. She was honestly done with my attitude of always disobeying her. "Sorry everyone. There was a lot of traffic due to which we got late." Armaan said guiltily and everyone bought the excuse but I could see my mother looking at me suspiciously.
I greeted Vihaan's family and his mom introduced me to the two girls who had accompanied them. Apparently, they were Vihaan's cousins. Daughters of Vihaan's uncle, Smriti and Amrit. Nice names. I said a polite 'hi' to them and then was pulled into an embrace by Smriti. I was startled at first but then hugged her back.
"OMG! You're so beautiful," Smriti said gleefully.
She seemed to be an outgoing person. "Thank you." I smiled.
"Hello. It's nice to meet you." Amrit smiled and folded her hands doing a namaste gesture.
Aww cute! I returned the gesture with a smile. Amrit was the younger one while Smriti was the elder one but Vihaan was the eldest among the three. Though they were sisters, the difference between them was stark. Smriti looked like the fun, extrovert person while Amrit was the polite, shy kind of yet both were warm and welcoming.
Vihaan was standing at some distance away from me at the far side. From the corner of my eyes, I could feel his stare on me. I just couldn't bring myself to look at him. It was difficult considering how nervous I felt and how my heartbeats rose whenever I looked into his eyes. Damn his eyes!
We went inside and the cool ambience greeted me. This was exactly what I was waiting for! It was rude that I still hadn't greeted Vihaan when I'd greeted everyone else but nevermind. We, females made our way to the women's section. I felt guilty of not even sparing a glance at Vihaan when he still had his eyes hooked on me. Why was I running away from him?
To be honest, I was least interested in selecting the dresses. When the wedding didn't mean anything to me why would it matter what I wear on each function? My mother and Sandhya Aunty got busy in choosing dresses for themselves leaving the two sisters to my rescue. They kept bickering and discussing what colour would suit me, if the lehanga is being too loud or too heavy, if it looks old fashioned or not and I simply nodded to everything they said. I tried on the dresses. It was tiring and after getting an approval from everyone, we were done with one aspect.
It took us a complete two hours to get done with it. I was frustrated and the cramps and mood swings didn't help it. The men were already waiting for us and it was at that moment when our eyes connected. He looked incensed for some reason. He had his arms folded across his chest and he raised his brows at me. What did he expect from me? A smile? I forced a smile tiredly which I was sure was as fake as my enthusiasm while shopping for all those designer clothes and looked away.
Next was the engagement ring. I wondered how everyone was so excited when I would've ran away at any moment I got. I was busy sulking that I didn't notice my father, Mr Rakesh Sharma come near me.
"Choose the best one. Don't compromise because of the price." He whispered gently. I nodded in agreement and gave him a small smile.
We belonged to a middle class family but we were well off. My father, brother as well as me used to earn. Also, like most indian families even mine had been saving money obviously for my wedding. The thought that my parents wanted to get me married only because they wanted those money to be put to some use had also crossed my mind once.
My mother pulled me to a corner when everyone was busy chatting with each other. "What's wrong with you? Atleast put some effort. It's your wedding Aarohi, not your neighbour's!" She chided.
I frowned. "What did I do?"
"You've been looking so bored since the time you've come here. Look at Smriti and Amrit, they're being so kind and helpful to you. The least you could do is stop acting nonchalant and look interested." She chastised.
"Mumma, you asked me to come so I did. I'm agreeing to whatever you people are saying so what's the issue? It doesn't matter if my mood is bad or bored because still the shopping has been fine. So don't bother please." I said grimly.
"Aarohi, be involved." Saying this, she left where everyone else was standing.
I went and stood beside Vihaan. My mood already sour.
"Di, you're going to make the prettiest bride ever." Smriti chirped excitedly.
"I agree! I just can't wait to witness all the functions." Amrit added in.
"You both are really sweet." I said sincerely. "And you don't have to call me Di. Aarohi is fine."
"I can already sense that you're going to be my favorite bhabhi."
"She's going to be your only bhabhi, Amu." Vihaan deadpanned from behind.
"Oh shush! Firstly she'll be my bhabs and later everything." Smriti said possessively coming near me and interlinking my arms with her making me chuckle.
"She seems a lot like me. Less talkative and introvert kind of. On top of that, she's so polite and well mannered." Amrit spoke thoughtfully.
Armaan snickered garnering everyone's attention towards him but instantly covered it up by coughing when I glared at him.
"Y'all will get lot of time to chitchat but for now let's go back to selecting rings." Sandhya Aunty suggested.
There were trays of rings, basically diamond rings displayed in front of us. They were so elegant and beautiful but the prices did bother me although it wasn't my place to think about it.
"Hello." I whispered to Vihaan feeling guilty for avoiding him like a plague.
"Oh so the Queen finally noticed me." He replied back sarcastically.
That stung a little. Not knowing what to say back, I kept my mouth shut. Sandhya Aunty was examing the rings carefully, asking everyone what did they think about it. I nodded in positive for all the rings she showed us which was because I wanted it to get over soon but they'd mistaken it as my courteous nature. Vihaan, unlike me involved himself by denying what he didn't like much and also gave his input in the form of words. I could feel two people throwing daggers at me through their eyes. One was unsurprisingly my mother and other was Vihaan. But did I care? Obviously No.
The ring selection was done. My eyes fell on the other corner of the shop where they displayed silver jewellery. Silver oxidized earings were something that interested me and I even liked them. But that wasn't the reason that had got me excited.
"Excuse me. I'll be right back."
"Aarohi but we aren't done. We need to buy some more items." My mother said trying to sound as gentle as possible.
"I trust your choices. I know you'll get me the best." I countered back sweetly and made my way to that section.
I purchased a simple kada (bracelet for men) and made the payment through my debit card. I almost bumped into Vihaan when I turned back who was standing with a frown on his forehead.
"You scared me." I breathed out placing my hand over my heart.
"What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing. What could be possibly wrong with me? After all, we're shopping for such a noble cause, my wedding." I retorted sarcastically.
"It's ours Aarohi." He gritted out. "I know you aren't interested in this wedding but don't make it so obvious. It won't hurt to pretend that you're enjoying and adjust a little." His jaw was clenched and he looked vexed.
"It's true that I'm least interested in all this. But it doesn't matter. My unconcerned behavior doesn't affect all this. Everything that had to be done for today is done without any difficulty. So me not pretending and adjusting doesn't make any difference. " I reasoned out.
He looked around before facing me trying to control his anger. "You're getting on my nerves Aarohi. Stop acting so mean."
"Oh really!" I feigned surprise. "Glad to know this. Hope you're enjoying yourself." I smiled and walked past him.
I know I was at fault and Vihaan wasn't wrong. On top of that, I even showed him attitude making everything even worse for me. But it just happened in the moment. I had been irritated since the time I'd woken up and after coming here, it has just kept on increasing with every passing minute. I know I've to apologise to him sooner or later. I sighed.
We all were seated in a restaurant as everyone felt hungry after spending so much time shopping. I settled on a sandwich and everyone placed their respective order. It was evening time.
"I can't believe Vihaan is getting married. He had always been so engrossed in work and expanding the business." Smriti exclaimed.
"Me too," Armaan joined in. "I never thought that my sister will ever get married. I was already expecting her to be a spinster." I kicked him on his shin from below the table as he was sitting beside me. He flinched a little before looking at me accusingly.
"Anyways, I'm just happy that Bhai has finally found someone and look at you aren't you the sweetest." Amrit cooed.
"Oh no no," Armaan barged in. "She's anything but sweet." He said horrified.
"Armaan," my mother called but he ignored the warning. Guess he felt too comfortable with everyone although it had only been a few hours with them.
"When Didi was in 7th grade, she had stolen my pocket money and brought herself a box of Ferrero Rocher and the rest of the money she'd donated to the old age home near the temple. I lost my 1000 rupees that were my savings for three months." He sounded sad as if he was remembering the dreadful incident that took place years back.
"All this only because he had eaten her favorite pizza all alone and didn't even save a slice for her because she wasn't at home at that time." My mother said dejectedly shaking her head.
"She didn't even share the chocolates with me!" Armaan cried out.
Everyone was laughing hysterically except me. Even Vihaan looked entertained. "I knew I made the right decision when I chose you. You're a perfect match to Vihaan." Sandhya Aunty beamed. I smiled to it tiredly and then focussed my attention back on the sandwich munching on it taking small bites.
Armaan nudged me. "You okay?" I nodded.
"You seem a little off. Even when I told about the stunt you'd pulled, you didn't react like I expected you to."
"Armaan. I'm fine. Now lemme eat."
If it was some other day, I would've scolded Armaan right then and there for embarrassing me but not today. I felt exhausted physically and mentally. Everything felt right and wrong at the same time. People around me where laughing, giggling, bonding and enjoying themselves. Looking at others being happy usually makes me happy but right now, I only felt one thing and that was melancholy. The reason for their happiness was this wedding but I don't feel happy about my own wedding. It was suffocating. I had even been cold towards Vihaan the whole day and it affected me honestly considering that we had spent a good time during last meet. The physical pain was complementary and I almost gave in to the urge to cry.
Why was I being so difficult and complicated? What was it that I was doing wrong? I wish I could talk to my parents, tell them about my inner turmoils but then again what will they do? They'll strictly tell me to follow what they say. They won't understand me and I can't complain since I haven't given them any good reason to be soft towards me by being rude and stubborn towards them.
We left after saying goodbyes and the elders shared some more sweet words regarding how they were looking forward to the engagement tomorrow. Sandhya Aunty hugged me lovingly and blessed me. Smriti and Amrit promised me that they'll take care of all the things from makeup to hair and I can just chill. I hugged my parents and sat in the car since Armaan was going to drop me off. Maybe it was the guilt or the overpowering sadness that I was feeling suddenly or maybe both but I couldn't bring myself to look at Vihaan and part ways. He didn't deserve this, he didn't deserve me. He didn't deserve the ignorance, he didn't deserve the tantrums I was throwing. I was messed up in my head and it wasn't doing any good to me or anyone else.
Armaan took the driver's seat. I peeped out of the window just in case Vihaan was still looking out for me but he had his back towards me. I sighed and leaned back into the seat and closed my eyes.
When you keep pushing people away from you continuously, you can't expect them to stick to you always and not give up.
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