"Today, Pranpriya," the man snarled, his fingers curled into a fist around the front of her shirt. "It happens today, or else. Do you hear me?"
Lisa nodded frantically, subtly trying to wiggle out of her uncle's grip. When he let her go, she stumbled a few steps backwards and reached up to smooth out her shirt.
"I will," she nodded quickly, clearing her throat and looking shyly at the man in front of her.
"I know you will," he said, his voice low in the back of his throat. "Get out."
"Yes sir," Lisa whispered. The Thai girl fixed her backpack on her shoulders before practically sprinting out of her house. Today. Today was the day.
Okay, so practically any interaction with Chaeyoung already made her nervous. But now... this was different.
She remembered it clearly. Her uncle had come home the night before, slurring his words and waving his empty bottle around at her. "I am not working with that son of a bitch Park," he had yelled, sending Lisa into a panic. What had he meant?
And then she had seen something change in him. As if he has appeared calmer. That's when he turned to Lisa, presenting her his perfect plan.
"You're going to make them hate us," he had laughed bitterly. "You're going to get that daughter of his to despise us."
Lisa had been confused at first, and somewhat panicked. Her fear only grew as he demanded that she do something... ANYTHING, to make Chaeyoung hate her. Enough that she would go home and tell her father.
And then he would brag about his perfect little Pranpriya. Enough that Victor Park just couldn't take it anymore. And then, her uncle would have the job all to himself.
Lisa thought it was ridiculous of him to use his own niece as a weapon. But of course, she'd learned not to underestimate him.
So now, a few hours after leaving for school, Lisa stood nervously in the front of the cafeteria. She'd planned this out as best as she could. All she would do is take Chaeyoung's phone and mess around for a few moments. That wouldn't do much harm, right?
But she had to make this believable. She couldn't mess up. If she didn't do this right, Lisa knew things wouldn't end well for her.
But hell, look at her. She was Park Chaeyoung. And she was beautiful. And Lisa wouldn't deny herself of that fact, even if she was supposed to be in love with Cody. Which she wasn't.
After debating what to do for way to long, Lisa took in a deep breath and swiftly made her way across the cafeteria. Suck it up, Manoban. She'd been in theatre classes. She could play a character.
"I'm not into guys like that."
Lisa paused when she heard those words escape Chaeyoung's mouth. None of the girls at the table had caught onto her presence yet.
"Or maybe you're not into guys at all," Lisa blurted out.
She'd heard the rumors. Hell, everyone had. She wasn't sure if they were true, but she was playing a character. She had to make Chaeyoung hate her. She couldn't risk it.
Lisa's eyes landed on Chaeyoung's phone and she quickly grabbed it, just as the girl looked up. Their eyes met briefly, and Lisa felt her stomach drop into her chest. She couldn't look at Chaeyoung, so she quickly diverted her eyes down to the girl's unlocked phone.
It was open to Chaeyoung's messages, and Lisa immediately raised an eyebrow when she saw someone had been sending Chaeyoung pictures of female models. Clothed, of course. But still. She had to be in character.
"That's interesting," Lisa laughed, trying to rid herself of all empathy for the girl. She forced herself to focus on what would happen to her if she didn't do this. "I knew you were gay, but I didn't know you were this gay."
Okay. So that was low. But she was in character. And the adrenaline coursing through her had basically taken over at this point.
"Don't you dare, Manoban."
Lisa flinched when one of the other girls at the table - Jisoo - jumped out of her seat and glared at her. When she looked away, she caught a glimpse of Chaeyoung once more. Her eyes were on her, pleading for her to stop. Lisa felt sick to her stomach.
"You know, too?" Lisa raised an eyebrow, holding up the phone and addressing Jisoo. She might as well make them all believe that she was about to reveal Chaeyoung's deepest darkest secret. The whole point of this was just the scare.
It became clear to Lisa that everyone's attention was on her. She could see the other students turned around in her seats, watching the events unfold. With a deep breath, she scrolled up a bit more in the messages.
Now the easy part. Just read a few, harmless messages. Give her a scare. That's all it was. Lisa took a deep breath and brought her phone up to her face.
"I don't know, Sophie," she read, picking a handful of random messages further up in the conversation. "I told him I was gay, and he seemed like he was okay with it. I don't know how I'm going to tell my mother, though."
It was only when Lisa looked up from the phone that she realized the messages hadn't exactly been harmless. She saw the look of sheer terror on Chaeyoung's face, and the look of shock spreading across her friend's faces.
She quickly looked down at the phone and re-read the messages, realizing what she said. Her heart dropped in her chest and the phone nearly fell out of her hands.
She had to finish this. She had to. Stay in character, Lisa.
"I knew it," was all she could manage to stutter out before she practically dropped Chaeyoung's phone and swiftly walked back towards her lunch table, feeling tears forming in her eyes.
All her friends were cheering her on, but the moment Lisa passed her table, she broke into a sprint, hearing Jisoo yelling from behind her. She flew through the gym doors and into the bathroom, practically tripping into one of the stalls just in time to lose her breakfast.
She'd just ruined someone's life.
And not just someone. That someone was Chaeyoung. Park Chaeyoung. The girl she really, really liked.
Lisa wiped the back of her mouth on her hand a few minutes later and slumped backwards against the side of the stall, burying her head inbetween her knees. Chaeyoung was going to hate her. Any possibility of forming any sort of friendship with the girl was completely destroyed.
Lisa didn't even feel bad for herself, though. She just hoped with everything in her that Chaeyoung was okay. This was her fault.
But hey, her uncle would be proud of her.
The moment the thought crossed Lisa's mind, she kicked the other side of the stall, jumping when the entire wall rattled.
A few minutes later, Lisa nearly screamed when the door to the bathroom burst open.
"Lisa?"
The Thai girl tensed, peeking under the stalls and relaxing slightly when she realized it was only the cheer team. She had been terrified that one of Chaeyoung's friends would come after her and make sure she never lived to see another day.
"Y-yeah?" she half-whispered, pulling herself up to her feet and quickly smoothing out her shirt.
"Are you okay?" Skylar's voice appeared from in front of her stall. Lisa slowly stepped out, wiping her eyes and nodding. Her friend immediately knew something was wrong, though, and raised a questioning eyebrow at her.
"I don't feel too good," Lisa mumbled. It technically wasn't a lie. "I think I'm gonna go to the nurse."
Luckily, her friend was understanding. Lisa denied her offer to walk with her. She needed to be alone. No, she deserved to be alone.
Hell, she was alone.
It wasn't just about playing a character anymore. Lisa had been playing different characters her entire life. She didn't even know who she really was. The real Lisa was hidden behind layers and layers of fear and insecurity. The real Lisa never would have done something like that to Chaeyoung.
But maybe the real Lisa was gone.
Lisa inhaled sharply the moment she met Chaeyoung's eyes once more.
"No," Lisa whispered, bringing her hands up to her face and pulling out of Chaeyoung's grip. She took a few rushed steps backwards and continued shaking her head.
"Lili," Chaeyoung bit her lip and moved forwards, attempting to place her hands back on Lisa's shoulders. The Thai girl flinched away, looking Chaeyoung up and down.
"No," Lisa repeated herself, feeling tears stinging her eyes as they began to spill over her cheeks. Chaeyoung reached out for her but the Thai girl panicked and swatted her hands away.
"Lisa, Lisa, it's me," Chaeyoung said quietly, trying to get the Thai girl to focus on her.
"I know," Lisa mumbled, holding out her hands to prevent Chaeyoung from getting any closer to. "You..." she shook her head. "You are supposed to hate me."
"What?" Chaeyoung whispered, running a hand through her hair and trying not to panic.
"You do not deserve me," Lisa shook her head, her hair falling in front of her face. "I hurt you. I... I hurt you," she continued, her voice cracking and becoming merely a whisper.
Chaeyoung felt her heart drop into her chest and she shook her head quickly. She reached out to grab Lisa's hand but the younger girl flinched and stumbled backwards, as if she was scared of the girl. In reality, Lisa was only scared of herself.
"Lili..." Chaeyoung whispered, unsure of what to do. She let her hands fall to her side and she looked around the cafeteria. This place held such bitter memories for her, and yet the fact that she had Lisa there with her made all the difference.
"Stupid," Lisa mumbled, shaking her head and bringing her hands up to her face. She weaved her fingers into her hair and bunched it into handfuls, continuing to walk backwards until she was met with the brick wall of the cafeteria. The Thai girl slid down to the floor, burying her head in her knees.
Lisa struggled to breathe between sobs. When she heard footsteps leaving, she bit down on her bottom lip to keep herself quiet. This is what she deserved.
"I'm gay."
Lisa lifted her head slowly when Chaeyoung's voice filled the empty air. She watched as the blonde girl jogged over to one of the tables, glancing back at her before hopping on top of it.
"I'm gay," she said louder, shrugging her shoulders and meeting Lisa's eyes. She threw her hands in the air, yelling this time. "I'm gay!"
"See? It doesn't matter, Lisa," Chaeyoung shook her head and hopped off of the table, sending her girlfriend a pleading look. "I don't blame you for doing what you did."
"Hell, Lisa, I would've fucking... fucking screamed it from the rooftop if it meant keeping your asshole of an uncle from putting his hands on you!" She threw her hands down at her sides, taking a careful step towards her girlfriend.
"For the longest time I thought that all I wanted an apology from you," Chaeyoung sighed, walking over to the wall and sitting down a few yards away from Lisa. She wanted to give the Thai girl her space.
"But then I realized it wasn't you I wanted an apology from," Chaeyoung bit her lip. "I mean, in the grand scheme of things, you basically just confirmed something that was already true. Yeah, I was gay. Still am."
Lisa wiped her eyes, blinking a few times and letting Chaeyoung's face slowly fade into her vision. She held her breath when she saw that Chaeyoung had tears in her eyes, as well.
"I think what I really wanted was an apology from myself... because of who I was," Chaeyoung continued. "I thought an apology would somehow change who I was and make things easier for me.”
"But I've realized that's not how it works," the blonde girl shook her head and glanced down at her hands in her lap. "I don't need to apologize for who I am. I don't need to apologize for taking up space... for existing."
"And hell, why does everyone seem to want things to be easy?" Chaeyoung let her hands fall to her side. "I want challenge. I want a struggle. I want all of that because I want the relief that comes when you realize that you've made it. I just... I like knowing I've done something. Or conquered something."
"And I'm sorry, Lisa," Chaeyoung wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry for telling everyone I hated you and taking out all my anger on you and I'm sorry for not being there for you when I could have. I'm sorry I didn't notice you were struggling. And I know... I was a bitch to you for the rest of high school, and I said things about you that I shouldn't have. I should have been there. I'm sorry. I'm so s-,"
Chaeyoung was cut off by a pair of arms being thrown around her neck, nearly knocking her over. Lisa crawled into her lap, burying her head into Chaeyoung's neck and holding tightly to her, making sure she was real. Making sure that she couldn't be taken away.
Chaeyoung's breath caught in her throat. Lisa looked up at her, tears streaming down her face. "I forgive you," Lisa managed to whisper. She cupped her girlfriend's face, pressing kisses all over her tear-stained face and pulling away to wipe her eyes.
Lisa knew that trying to stop Chaeyoung from apologizing was worthless. Lisa didn't need an apology, nor did she want one, but she had realized that it was Chaeyoung's way of apologizing to herself.
"I am sorry t-too," Lisa whispered, letting her hands rest on Chaeyoung's shoulders and combing her fingers through the older girl's hair. Somehow, in her own apology, Lisa felt a weight lifted off her own shoulders.
Chaeyoung just nodded softly, knowing that was enough. She brought her hand up to cup the back of Lisa's head, gently guiding her to rest her head back on her shoulder. Chaeyoung laid her head against Lisa's, feeling some sort of silent agreement pass between them. They had apologized. Both to themselves and each other. And for them, that was enough.