SING ME HOME ✰ l. patterson [jatp]

𝐢𝐢. #𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝...𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞?

THE REST OF CLASS sped by the moment Flynn and I finally got settled back into our seats. Julie never came back to class, but a few minutes after Flynn and I returned to the classroom, Mrs. Harrison had received a phone call from the classroom phone. She hung up at the end, thanking our school Nurse, Mrs. Emerson for letting her know. Which brought Flynn and me to the conclusion that Julie had walked to the Nurse's office when she left us by the stairwell. We were hoping to catch up to her at our lockers once music ended, signaling the end of the school day, but before we could even step out of the classroom doors, Mrs. Harrison told me to stay back. Flynn had a bus to catch, plus she wasn't asked to stay behind, so I told her to go ahead and that if she ran into Julie, then to just text me.

I didn't even need to think about what Mrs. Harrison wanted to talk about, it had been clear from the moment I failed to perform the piece I'd prepared. Again, she told me how she wanted to let me stay in the program, but if I wouldn't at least play a piece on the guitar, then she couldn't allow me to. She lectured about how being in the music program was a way of growing your artistry, embracing new knowledge, and branching out in your music. And that she had been excited when she saw that I had added two instruments onto my form for the year, but has since only been slightly disappointed that every chance we were asked to perform something, I had chosen the piano.

So, like she did Julie, she gave me a last chance grab at keeping my seat for the semester. The next time we would be doing an assignment of arranging our own music and showing our progress with our instruments, it was either I perform a piece on a guitar, or I lose my spot. Thankfully, to her at least, this next test/big assignment, would be just a little over a week from now– 12 days, almost two weeks.

I couldn't let her know then and there that she was most likely going to be giving up my seat. If I did, she'd probably remove me from the program then and there. At least now, if I played it off as if I was going to try and get myself to suck up the grief and actually string together a chord or two– I'd have 12 more days in the program with my best friends.

And even if both ways ended up with me losing my seat, at least I still had those 12 days.

By the time my meeting was done, Flynn had texted me saying she had missed Julie at her locker and had to rush to get to her bus. Julie barely missing Flynn also meant that she had gotten a big headstart on our walk home. Which also meant, I had to walk home alone. Which I didn't mind all that much, because I knew that it meant Julie just wanted some space and I was more than willing to let her have that. So on the walk home, it was just my headphones, my music, and me.

When I got home, Dean's car was in the driveway, but when I got home he wasn't downstairs in the living room or in the library where I'd normally find him. I didn't feel like doing homework, so I took advantage of the silence before Olivia would get home from school and laid out on the couch, put on Netflix, selected Grey's Anatomy, and swiftly fell asleep. It felt like a quick power nap, maybe no longer than 30 minutes. At least it felt like it did until I woke up to Olivia standing in front of me, chewing on tangerine slices and nudging me with her knee.