Freak » Narry [ON HOLD!]

Chapter 20

★ Niall's P.O.V

"Talk again, and I'll kill you." Simon whispered into my ear, smiling widely as he wrapped his cold hands around my throat.

With a scream I woke up, in a split second my whole body starts to tremble and the tears quickly makes their way down my cheeks. Slowly I crawl up like a ball, hugging myself to find some kind of comfort, but it doens't work, not at all.

I keep having nightmares, horrible nightmares about Simon...

I honestly thought that once in my life, I would be happy, that everything would be fine. But how stupid can I be? My life is always going to be a hell, always. 

When I saw Simon at school, I didn't want to believe it, I still don't. But he's really here, and he clearly remembers me. The look on his face when he laid eyes on me, was disgusting. He smirked, he looked pleased. I don't get how he fucking could stand there, knowing what he has done to me, and act like nothing.

Why is he even here? Why would he come back?

"Niall?" a worried voice filled the room and I jumped in surprise before I let my eyes fall upon my boyfriend, whom just had opened the door to his room, "are you okay?"

For days, I have pushed him away, I won't let him touch me, I won't barely even look at him. Heck, I won't even let him sleep on his own fucking bed. He's been sleeping on the couch for many nights, still he cares so much, he treats me like an angel. 

How can he love me?

I'm so worthless... 

The only thing I'm good at, is to hurt people, and that's not good at all. 

Harry should hate me, because thanks to me, his life is becoming a mess. A big part of me, wishes that he and I, never should of made the descision to become friends. But without him, I wouldn't be able to see the few good things in life, without him I would be lost. 

"Niall?" his concerned voice made me let out a sob, I miss him so much, still I push him away. Because I'm scared, of hurting him even more than I already do, but also because... Simon is back, and I know that he will hurt us both, in some kind of way.

Quickly I got up from the bed and ran over to Harry, I wrapped my arms around his neck and held onto him for dear life, "I'm s-so sorry," I cried out, I'm so damn selfish, but I need him, even though I keep on hurting him.

Harry got a bit startled by the sudden attack from me, but it doesn't take long until he wraps his arms around me, "you have nothing to be sorry about, okay?" he whispers as he plays with my hair.

Nothing to be sorry about? There's a lot of things that I have done wrong, I've pushed him away, I've let him think that it's his fault that I'm acting like this, I've made him feel lonely, I've just done everything wrong.

"Harry, I'm... s-sorry." I pull away a little, so our eyes can meet. He has done nothing wrong, I'm the one that have. I hate myself for being so weak, it's maybe not fair of me to blame everything on Simon, but thanks to him, I don't know what it's like to be strong. 

"I forgive you, Ni," 

Those words was enough for me to carefully embrace his lips with mine, and it just hits me how much I've missed to kiss him, hug him and talk to him...

I guess Harry has missed me too, because he held me closer to him and wouldn't dare to pull away from the kiss, not that I minded.

"Hey... does this mean I can sleep here, with you?" he suddenly asks, ruining the emotional moment between us, but maybe that's for the best, now days it only seems like we go through too much emotional things.

"Yeah," I mumble and smile, "it's your bed, so.. I should of been the one to sleep on the couch," I do feel bad, very bad, for making him sleep on the couch, but he did it for me...

"Our," 

I look at him, a bit dumbfounded.

"It's our bed," he said as he laid down on it, pulling me down with him. 

A minute ago or something, I was crying, I was scared, but now I'm all happy and smiling, and it's all thanks to this beautiful boy. 

Seriously, I wouldn't be able to live without Harry..

"Niall?" he almost whispers, after a moment of silence between us.

"Mhm?"

"Did... uh," he sounded nervous, and that made me slightly nervous too, "did Mr. Cowell, or whatever his name is, do something to you?"

His question made me sit up in surprise and I think I forgot how to breath for a second or two. 

"The thing is... you've been acting like this ever since he turned up, and I know that someone hurt you very badly in the past, and... god, I don't know," he sat up and grabbed my hands, "Niall, I don't know what to think anymore. Because I've been thinking so much these last few days, that my head hurts, and I've been trying so hard to try and understand why you would act like that... and, all I could come up with, is that everything got bad, when that man stepped into that classroom." he sighed, "I even think I sound crazy, but that doesn't stop me from having these thoughts... so, please, just tell me the truth. Did he do something to you?"

"Harry, I've never met that man in my life before, never."

Uhm... well, first of all, I'm so sorry for not updating in such a long time. But... I haven't had the time to write.

And second of all, sorry for this messy and short chapter. Once again, it was kind of like a fill in chapter thingyyy yess... I just wanted to write so badly, but my brain is kind of half dead, so........... yeah.

Oh, and yeah, I've been getting a few hate mails and shiz. People saying that this story sucks, that  I can't write and blahblahblah.

It's okay to have your own opinion, but honestly, if some of you don't like this story, then don't read it - to later message me saying how much you hate it? It's just a waste of time. AND sorry if there's a lot of errors, but I haven't edited a single chapter, and I don't know when I'm going to. Also, I'm not English, so I can't simply write every single word exactly the way it should be written, so just.... s t o p. 

but, toooo all that read this story and actually like it, thank you so much for all the amazing supppoorrt<3 I'm so happy that I will cry myself to sleeep tonight with my overweight dog. 

thanks for reading & hope you liked it <3

xx bellaaaa