part 2!! i'm upset that dream chose us then rejected us for george on karl's stream the other night. dhmu, going dark, only the real ones know
warnings: cussing and yelling
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clay's pov:
~before the break up~
lately, i've been feeling overly stressed. my fans are demanding more videos and streams, people are attacking me on different subjects, and just so much more that i can't put into words. the stress is also affecting my relationship with y/n too. she wants to spend time with me but i can't, i have too much to work on. i hate this so much.
i need to take a break from y/n...
it would be the best thing for now. we both could work on our jobs and maybe relieve some stress. i know it's hard to work two jobs for her so maybe a little break will be good for us.
~back to now~
"have a nice life, clayton." y/n says, closing the front door behind her.
there she goes. i didn't mean for her to leave. i just wanted to tell her that i needed a little break. i- i just didn't know how to tell her but she pushed me to yell. it's not her fault though, none of it was. it was all my fault. and now, now she's gone, maybe for good.
patches comes up to me and rubs against me. i push her away lightly, "not right now, patches. i need some alone time."
i get up and slam my bedroom door shut behind me. what have i done? i just lost the only person that cared for me.
"WHAT DID I DO!?" i yelled, punching my desk.
tears fall down my face but i don't care. i just lost
y/n and i don't know what to do now. i obviously have to give her space because that's the smart thing to do.
"fuck.."
——three weeks late——
these past weeks have been hell. i told george and nick about everything and they of course called me an idiot, anyone would if they found out what i did. george and nick didn't really know what to do. they told me to talk to her but i told them i would give her some space. they both agreed that was probably best.
i wonder how y/n is doing. is she doing okay? she's probably not... i caused her too much pain. i saw it in her eyes.
i need to call her...
*ring*
*ring*
*ring*
"hello?" i hear from the other line.
she sounds so heart broken. holy shit, what have i done?
"hi.." i whisper back.
"what- what do you what?"
"i need to talk to you about everything." i say, picking at my fingers.
"well i don't really want to." you can hear the anger flowing from each word that she says.
"i know i know. but at least listen, please."
she stays silent until, "fine."
i take a deep breath and let it out, "i am so very fucking sorry for what i said. i didn't mean to yell at you like that. i just meant to tell you that i wanted a little break so i could focus on work. none of this was you're fault, it was all my fault and i take all the responsibility for this. but i want you to know, i love you so so much even if you decide to actually break up with me. while you were gone, all i thought about what i fucked up. my stupid self thought it was a good idea to think about the fans more than my girlfriend. that was such a shitty idea and i promise not to do it ever again. i'm so sorry, y/n."
"i- i love you too. i did push you too much to tell me what was going on so i will take responsibility for that. but, i forgive you, clay. while i was gone, i thought about everything too and i decided it was a stupid idea to even leave. i should've stayed to figure things out than to run away from the problem. i'll be over in a bit."
"thank you so fucking much, babe. i love you so much. i'll see you in a bit."
"i love you too. see ya." she says.
we both hang up. i fall onto my back and stare at the ceiling. holy shit, that went better than i thought it would.
—skip to y/n getting there—
*knock knock*
i rush to my feet and swing the front door open. standing there, is y/n with her bags. oh how i missed her and her stuff. i engulf her in a tight hug, picking her up off the ground in the process. she holds me just as tight, wrapping her legs around me.
"thank god you're back." i say, placing my hand on the back of her head, gently rubbing her hair.
she doesn't say anything but leans back and stares into my eyes, "i'm glad that i'm back."
i lean in and smash my lips against hers. we both just stay there, enjoying the moment. after everything, this gorgeous woman decided to come back after i did that. what did i do to deserve her? we both pull back and stare at each other.
"i love you so fucking much." i say, sliding my hand down to her waist with my other hand.
"i love you too." she smiles, playing with my hair.
"what the fuck did i do to deserve you."
i place my head in her neck, kissing her neck lightly. we both stay silent as we stand there a bit more.
"let me bring your stuff in and we can go sleep." i say, setting her back down.
she nods and brings me in for another kiss, "only for good measures."
i chuckle and shake my head. y/n walks up the stairs as i grab her stuff, setting it by the door as i shut it with my foot. i run up the stairs and close the bedroom door once i get in the room. y/n is already there waiting for me with her arms out to me. i jump on the bed and wrap my arms around her, laying her on top of me.
"thank you for forgiving me." i mumble.
"anything for you." she mumbles back.
"i love you."
"i love you too."
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holy shit. this was.. amazing. i- no words for it.
i hope you all have an amazing day! love you all!! <3
