Be My Baby Boy

Dead and Deader

Peter pinked. "Will you now let me put Kevlar on your arms and legs, too?"

Wade groaned. "They had a bazooka. I'm not sure Kevlar would help. Look! It even ripped my mask when one of the shots grazed it and you did put Kevlar there!"

Peter couldn't argue that. "But how often do criminals have bazookas, honestly?"

"So, what have you been doing?" Wade asked, basking in Peter's care.

"You know, working, dishes."

Wade cocked his head. "Working? Like a paying job? Have I heard this before?"

"Uh, yeah, Wade. Freelance photographer? Ring any bells? Photos of Spider-Man in action, plus artsy photos of the city from angles others can't get. Only me with my webs and sticky hands and feet can get there."

"Oh, the photos? That's a job?" Wade asked and wiggled his tiny toes.

"What did you think I did for a living?" Peter asked, watching the translucent digits wiggle almost fondly. Wade's limbs kept getting severed. You sort of had to get used to it.

"Avenging?"

Peter sputtered. "That... that doesn't pay!"

"It doesn't? You mean you're saving the world on a regular basis and you don't get paid??!" Wade looked outraged.

"Welcome to being a hero, Wade."

"That's just not right..." Wade muttered.

"Let it go, Wade," Peter sighed. He started to help Wade out of his wrecked suit and took off the the teleportation belt first and put it on the sofa table. It lay there gently smoking. "Huh. It's never done that before." The belt crackled and a few small sparkles flew out.

"It's fine," Wade said. "Are you going to wash me?"

Just then Peter's phone rang. "It's Cap." He answered the phone. "What's up mr Rogers, Steve, sir?" He listened intently. "Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can." He hung up. "Gotta go, murderbots in Brooklyn."

Peter suited up quickly and opened the window to swing to the rescue.

"Wait!" he heard. Wade scuttled across the floor lopsidedly on his knee on one side and on the tiny translucent foot still growing on the other side.

"What?"

"Just wanted to kiss you goodbye, baby boy," Wade said, standing awkwardly on his mismatched legs.

Peter hurriedly bent down and kissed Wade's mask where his mouth would be, then turned around to the open window again only to freeze. "Ack! Wade!"

"Just wanted to kiss my precious goodbye, too. Love ya! Miss ya!" Wade cooed and patted the spandex covered butt gently.

Peter's face burned under his mask.

"I thought you were in a hurry," Wade said smugly. "Go, go! I'll come and help when I finish growing my leg."

Peter groaned and leapt out the window.

No one knew where the bots came from. Suddenly they were just there, attacking early afternoon shoppers with what looked like some sort of ray guns. The Avengers were already hard at battle when Peter showed up. He swung into action valiantly, but the webs were little hindrance to the metal bots and their lasers just cut right through them. The others were making better work with their weapons, but more bots just kept on coming.

"You know we could use your boyfriend right about now," Sam panted to Peter, ducking behind their meagre shelter. Tony scowled. "What? He helped me out earlier. Did his leg grow back yet?" Sam asked Peter.