Beyond the Walls || L. Ackerman

Chapter 1: Convincing

          It's true what they say... That time heals all wounds. Unfortunately, many wounds leave a permanent scar. I just wished that time was capable of erasing the scars as well, or perhaps even giving me a warning in advance of becoming the causing of my own pain.

          "Father, please!" I begged with every ounce of convincing I could muster up within me. My eyes were wide with pleading. I was on the brink of desperation with my father even though I knew it was a long shot. When I heard that the Militia was running short on designated medical staff and in search of volunteers, I saw it as an opportunity. Not just to help people which was what I sought to do most, but to leave this castle that I saw as that of a prison. Of course, there were multiple branches of military, but the one that interested me the most was the Scout Regiment. They put their lives on the line selflessly to help the progression of society and it was something I could only dream of doing one day. Being a noble though, it's very unlikely that those dreams would come true. While I could not be a brave soldier, I could still possibly help the brave soldiers. Maybe not by putting my own life on the line, but in another way. I was desperate to find any other way.

          "It's far too dangerous, Mariam! I won't send my only daughter to get killed along the front lines" My father baffled. He was paranoid and cautious, not necessarily for no reason though. I was merely a baby when more than half of my family was murdered. The details of which were indistinct to me as it was never spoken of much but my father did tell me this, "We're royals, Mariam. That means we have constant targets on our backs." Still, even with most of my family being wiped out, including my siblings, we all knew I wasn't Rod Reiss's only daughter. However, we all knew better than to mention it. While my father was married to my mother, Regina Reiss, he had impregnated another, unknown woman. I don't know how my mother went on knowing her spouse had been unfaithful, for I had not the strength nor patience to ever experience that. The child he had with the woman, Historia Reiss, was my half-sister, illegitimate, but I never really saw why it mattered that we had different mothers if we shared a father. But I suppose I am "naïve" in that way, despite being 16 years of age.

          "I think you know quite well that there's very little chance I'll get hurt while simply volunteering as a medical aid to the Survey Corps!" I challenged. Even if I could get hurt, it wouldn't have mattered to me as long as I was doing something useful with my life instead of sitting in a castle all day. My father sighed, exhausted from repeating this same conversation that had no avail.

          "We can discuss this later, now please go get ready and prepare yourself for the party later this evening. We're celebrating the Scout Regiment coming back from their Expedition Outside the Walls." He dismissed me. I screamed internally and exited my father's study without further protest. As a royal, I had many eyes on me, even more so due to the fact that I was a girl thrust into society's attention. I had so many other redeeming qualities that were all reduced to me being a young socialite who hadn't a single care in the world. Want to know what I think? Personally, I think it's all just a load of shit.

          I was pinning my hair into a half up-half down style, letting the bottom half of my hair cascade in neat, loose curls down my back as I heard a knock on my door. I rushed past my four poster canopy bed on the center wall of my incredibly spacious room, trying not to trip over my floor length gown to open the door. My mother poked her head through the entrance as I allowed her in. She admired me up and down with pride dancing in her eyes.

          "My, have you grown! Time sure does fly, I swear just yesterday you were running through the castle halls while I chased you around!" She gushed. Her hand flew to my face to brush a strand curl away from my eyes. My mother. I felt unworthy of being her daughter, she was everything I wanted to be and more. She grew up wealthy, but was still so humble and empathetic due to her own mother not being as fortunate. Her beauty was beyond unmatched so when people told me I resembled her, I took it as the greatest compliment.

          "Have you spoken with father about me going to volunteer with the Survey Corps?" I asked ever so eagerly. Her face dropped and the light reminiscing in her eyes vanished suddenly. I felt guilty to be asking this, but I couldn't contain my desperation. Her hand recoiled and she started fiddling with her sleeves.

          "I know how badly you wish to help the scouts defeat the titans but there are dangers out there that we'll never understand and I couldn't bare it if something unspeakable happened! The world is vicious, my child. Don't we already have everything we could possibly need or want right here?" She tried convincing me. To her misfortune, I could not be convinced by anything or anyone.

          "It's not just about that, Mom" I pleaded. "I feel so useless sitting here in the comfort of this castle while our soldiers risk their lives daily to try to bring peace and order to our civilization." She gave me a look of understanding, she knew how I felt and she wanted me to be happy but at what cost? I continued, "Needless to remind you how I feel about being cooped up in this castle, behind walls that I still have yet to venture beyond." My mother closed her eyes and sighed softly, realizing I would not stop until I got what I wanted.

          "Okay." She stated plainly. I raised my eyebrows at her, questioning what she meant but I already had a good idea of what she was going to say. "If this is what you really want to do, then I'll do whatever I can to make sure it happens for you." She said, giving a tight-lipped but sincere smile.

          "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" I jumped up and down as I went to gather my mother in a tight hug. "I love you so much, you won't regret this and I promise to make you proud!" I exclaimed with glee.

          "Yes, yes. Now finish getting ready and come downstairs to greet the guests." Mother instructed me with a wide smile and she made her way out my bedroom door.

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EEEEEE OK. I've literally never written any stories for entertainment before so this might be really bad but idk so PLEASE feel free to leave any questions, comments, concerns, advice or anything. Try not to be mean tho pls, I'm only 15 so I'm still learning A LOT about writing and what people like reading!!
Also, the first few chapters are quite short but I promise they get longer!

As always, thanks for reading! and ily all <3