why don't we | christmas oneshots ✓

MY ONLY WISH | donah

the room felt so small. hospital bed neatly placed in the center. a wide array of machines hooked up to the walls, the ceiling, daniel's body. the sight was nothing short of terrifying. jonah knew he was terrified when he first saw.

he wished there was something he could do as he hid his stray tears into his shirt, wishing he could be brave for his boy for however long he had left. but it was so hard. it was hard putting up a front when all he wanted to do was break down.

he couldn't imagine a life without daniel. there wasn't one without him. 

days would turn into weeks in what felt like seconds. sullen cheeks and showcased ribs would consume his being and turned him into a hollowed expectation of grieving loved one. 

he didn't want to be a label. a statistic.

he wanted to be daniel's boyfriend. 

and he wanted daniel to stay alive.

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sometimes jonah wished he'd taken advantage of the small time he had left with daniel. he wished he'd sung for the boy, produced a gentle melody to wash away the blonde's worries while he still could. he wished he made sure daniel knew he loved him. he loved him so much and instead of telling him, he cried. and he begged him not to go.

did daniel even know?

did daniel even fathom how much jonah loved him.

how dependent jonah's happiness was on daniel?

daniel was his entire world. and jonah doesn't think the boy even knew.

and now he'd never get to.

somewhere along the way he started crying. thick, wet tears sliding down his face. along that same road he also started to figure out where he was going. where his subconscious guided him to hang onto that lingering piece of comfort.

where daniel and him had met.

they'd met at this beautiful beach. the sand feeling as fluffy and soft as snow as both boys mutually agreed that winter was their favorite time and year and hosted their favorite holiday. the waves were so calm yet so wild. the water so clean, mesmerizing the blonde couldn't help but the drag the brunette into the tantalizing ocean.

the laughs they shared rung throughout jonah's head like a siren. and it hurt, so much. probably the worst pain he'd ever felt. 

wasn't it supposed to be comforting?

he came here to be close to daniel. not have the universe hurt him again. 

he only wanted one thing. if he could have one single wish, it would be to have daniel back, even if it's just for a christmas day. 

༄  

"will you do something for me?"

jonah moved to sit up, casting hazel eyes to connect with weak, sickly blue ones.

"yeah, of course. anything."

"not-not now. when i.."

"daniel, don't talk like that."

"we can't pretend like it's not gonna happen."

"it won't! it won't happen it can't."

"jonah, the doctors don't even know what's wrong with me! they just know i'm going to fucking die, and before i do i want to make sure you do something for me!"

the outburst beckoned a fit of coughing. the harsh, wheezing hacks shaking the boy's entire body as he leaned forward to regain his grip on reality.