When our story first began...

~3~

Years passed, and we never went back to that village ever again. Actually, we never went on a family vacation since those days.

Well of course we can't... After months of suffering from cancer, mom passed away. She became the brightest star in the sky that keeps watching me, and being proud of me. "I hope". However, she'll always be inside my heart, her words will always be my best melody, her hugs are my comforting moments that are now only a memory...

Mom was the only human on earth that encourages me to follow my dreams. How beautiful she was! With her smile that is still engraved in my mind. She was the only human on earth who actually believed in my dream, who believed in me. I loved her the most. Losing her was a tragedy for all of us. Dad could never have the same old life. When he used to tease her so much, and when they argue about some random TV shows, or whether the zebras are black or white. He misses her every morning nagging when she tries to wake up my brother, when my father forgets to turn off the lights, when I burn the food that everybody was waiting. My elder brother became a grown up after that, he was no longer the weirdo teenager that loves sports but hates parties. I still remember on his last year of high school, I was a little kid back then. On his prom night, he literally left his prom date waiting for him for the whole night while was suddenly decided to go take a run instead of picking her up. Mom really got mad that day, dad too. He said : "I don't even know her, she just stuck onto me and I didn't even want to go there, it's just so weird when everybody starts pretending to be in love while in reality, they aren't".

I think that what he did was somehow cool, it was true that mostly high school kids don't love, they just think they like a person so they rush and get into a relationship that may lead to horrible consciousness that no one would ever want. My brother went to military when he turned 28 years old, in the name of defending the country and helping civilians.

In conclusion, our family got separated after losing one member.

Death... Isn't it just so cruel for the living people? Maybe it's a release from sorrow for the deceased, but not for its family, friends, lovers...

I chose after mother's death to live where she passed her teens, where she met dad; in a small city called "Yellow Springs". It wasn't so famous back then, not many people used to live here, but she loved it, enjoyed her days, and had many memories in her streets. But today, it somehow became a little bit bigger than it used to be. You can find many schools, markets, small businesses, parks; anything that any other city would have.

Mom was occupying a tiny apartment, where she has been before marrying my father, where I installed my paintings and brushes to chase my dream.

It was actually in the second floor, with a balcony. At the entrance, a mirror you so you could check yourself before going out, but I rarely use because of my uncomfortableness when seeing myself or other people on glasses. With a black leather sofa at your left and an old TV putted on a kind of library; that barely works sometimes. The kitchen was opened to the living room. With only one room and a miniscule bathroom. Since I moved there, I frankly changed the whole house decoration *that's only if it was actually decorated*. The library under the Television finally had books and CDs in it. I liked to add too many pillows on the couch for more comfortability. Some plants here and there, that I never forgot watering because technically my life is pretty empty, other than going to work, or looking for other work applications, I had nothing to do with my life. So I take care of my plants, I draw from time to time. I repaint the walls if I'm extremely bored. I try cooking; thing that I'm still working on, my food tastes amazingly bad. In my room where you can find my clothes hanging on a clothes stand, a large single bed with ancient pink sheet; and of course, too many pillows and two teddy bears; a giant light brown one, and a tiny panda bear.

I've decided to move to mom's old house in order to achieve my dream. I've always wanted to become a famous painter that would be recognized for many ages. Same as the famous deceased ones, like the legendary Vincent Van Gogh, Frida Kahlo, Mary Cassatt, Salvador Dali, Claude Monet and many others... But when I reached my seventeens, I knew it can't really become true because I simply didn't know many people and didn't have much of interaction with the world. In other words, I was an introvert. So I just quitted my dream and turned it into hoping to become an art teacher, or anything that is related to arts.

I believe that many people have billions of dreams while some others are still lost in the middle of nowhere, with no path to walk in; letting the routine take the power over them. How hard is it to find your own objective in life, or to be more specific; you own "GOAL". Life is full of mysteries, full of surprises; same as us. It may need too much time to know what your dream is, but it will always come one day. Just like how we think we already know ourselves so well while each minute, we discover our real identity.

But mostly Miss. Society kills every new light that comes out. She smashs and destroys us with her words that feels like knifes stabbing deep inside our bodies and minds... in order to keep on living in peace, you have to let her comes onto you and rule your whole life. But does that mean that you'll have you happiness? Well, you won't. Maybe fighting is hard, maybe it's tiring. But if you don't try, you'd never reach. I know it's really hard to keep your hopes up when no one is standing by your side. But sometimes, all you need is to believe in yourself. I believe in you.

For me, living in a whole new city at your early adultness was never easy, especially for a lost person like me with no stable job. However, at the end, it doesn't matter as long as I keep on breathing and keep on living at my own. And somehow, I'm frankly happy with my simple life that "I" rule, by my own...

𝓓𝓸𝓷'𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓴 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓾𝓬𝓴 𝓲𝓼 𝓼𝓾𝓹𝓮𝓻 𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓮🤩𝓘 𝓳𝓾𝓼𝓽 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓭 𝓲𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓬𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮 𝓲𝓽 𝓪𝓼 𝓪 𝓹𝓲𝓬 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻😂

𝓐𝓷𝔂𝔀𝓪𝔂𝓼, 𝓗𝓸𝓹𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓭𝓸𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝔀𝓮𝓵𝓵💜 𝓓𝓸𝓷'𝓽 𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓰𝓮𝓽 𝓽𝓸 𝓴𝓮𝓮𝓹 𝓸𝓷 𝓼𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰✨

*𝓦𝓱𝓪𝓽'𝓼 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓬𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓭𝓱𝓸𝓸𝓭 𝓭𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓶? 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓲𝓼 𝓲𝓽 𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓪𝓶𝓮 𝓾𝓹 𝓽𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓷𝓸𝔀?*🌸