Ernie and the Officer

EPISODE 4:

Granny: ARE YOU SURE?!?!?
Ernie: Yes
Jack: my moms dead
Granny: IDK YOU SEEM LIKE A MURDERER
Ernie: I'm so sorry
*jack runs away crying*
Granny: This is what happens when you leave your family, now go apologize to the boy..
*Ernie runs after jack*
Ernie: WAIT
Ernie: I'm sowwwy
Granny: Dumbass
Audry: GRANNY
Granny: sorry Audry: GRANNNNNY SWEARSSSSS *she  runs to Ernie*
Ernie: *Is still chasing after Jack*
Granny: kids...
Holly* barks
Ernie: JACK WAIT UP
*Jack runs to a bedroom, to put some pants on*
Ernie: Uh- Ima- Ima wait outside the door- k-k-kiddo
'Jack's mom in the living room' : wha-
Jack: ok
GRANNY DO YOU HAVE ANY PANTS??!
Ernie: *Is that Martha?*
Granny: in the guest room
Jack: WHY DO YOU HAVE 2 GUEST BEDROOOMS
Alyssa: I question that boy-
Ernie: MARTHA
*Jack runs to the other bedroom*
MARTHA IS THAT YOU? Granny: ernie shush the adults are talking-
Granny and Alyssa continue talking
Ernie: NO, I WANT TO KNOW IF THATS MY SISTER
*Audry goes to find Jack some pants*
Alyssa: ....
Granny: ernie if you truly want to know then follow me to the back yard...
Ernie: *Stands up and walks with Granny*
*Holly follows them into the back yard*
Granny: *silently walks back in to go comfort Alyssa*
Ernie: *Stands up to see Jack standing in the doorway with tears in his eyes*
Jack: I just want some pants....
Audry: I'll find you some pants!
*Audry runs to the other bedroom*
*Audry runs to the other other bedroom...*
Audry: I FOUND SOME PANTS JACK!!!!

-- At Daves House--

Dave: *sees joe walking up to him*
Joe: hey dave!
Dave: hey..
Joe: what's wrong?
*he says as he sits next to dave with a concerned look*
Dave: I couldn't find a raccoon...
Joe: wait but you only look for raccoon when you're sad-
*joe then keeps his gaze locked on dave while embracing him in hug*
Dave: ...
Joe: do you want to talk about it?..
*dave quietly nods*

-- At Berts House--

Well..... we walked in with the camera
There was some nsfw stuff going on so uh
We're gonna move on

--@ grannys house--

Ernie: *Walks inside and sits next to Alyssa*
Ernie: So uh, how do you know Martha?
Alyssa: *still crying* I'm her wife...
Ernie: She was gay?
Granny: yea
Ernie: Ok uh, is there anything I could do for you
Ernie: Do you need anything
Alyssa: *sniff*  maybe you could go get my groceries for me?..
And mow the lawn?
Ernie: *Facepalms* Ok, where are the groceries
Jack: At the store idiot
*jack turns to Audry* your dads an idiot
Ernie: Uhm about that
*Audry nods*
Ernie: Im kindaaaa being chased down by the police so uh
Jack: AND HES ON THE RUN
Ernie: *Nods*
Alyssa: that's seems like a MINOR INCONVENIENCE
jack: Nevermind...
Jack: He's just stupid
*Alyssa and granny nod*
Ernie: Fine.... Can I borrow a hoodie and jeans.... ~~Dave~~ I mean, the police wouldnt recognize me in something so..... basic
Granny: fine...
Ernie: Oh uh.... and a car
Jack gets up and goes to Audry who's found a par of pants
Jack: thanks Audry!!!
Audry: *hands pants*
Jack puts on the pants
Audry hugs Jack
Granny: ugh fine but only this once, dont crash it
Ernie: Ive only crashed 5 cars this month
And Only 1 was a police car
Granny: >:(

Audry: Oh look the results came in!
Jack: What results?
Ernie: COME ON AUDRY
Audry: the ones that tell me if Ernies me dad
Ernie: WE'RE GOING TO THE STOREE
Audry: DaDdDdDdDd i dont wannnnna
Ernie: Im. Gonna. Count. To. 3.
Audry: I DONT WANNA DIE AGAIN!!!!!!
Audry: *hides behind Jack*
Random raccoon: AGAIN?!
*Suddenly, Sweet Home Alabama starts playing quietly in the distance*
Ernie: ONE!!!
Jack: *pulls out dna test*
Also jack: Uhhhhhhh
Alyssa: we just gonna ignore the coon-
*Audry runs away in fear of her dad...*
Ernie: TWO!!!!!!!
Jack: Uhgghhncdhjk
Ernie: IF I GET TO THREE
Granny & Alyssa: •.•
Ernie: THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jack: You guys aren't related...

------ End OF Episode 4 ------