A Court of Stars and Shadow

Chapter 44

The camp had disappeared by the time I came out of my tent. It would have seemed like no one had even been on the field if it wasn't for the trampled grass or the smell of unwashed men.

Carnel was standing at the far edge of the field, three large Illyrians In front of him, all of them looking much, much older than him but there was no mistake in who was in charge, I smiled.

They disappeared in a wisp of black smoke and I approached him carefully, Carnel turning to face me when he heard my footsteps on the grass behind him. He studied me warily, eyes roaming over my body and my face, trying to see the answers he wanted without me saying them. I opened my mouth, to apologize, to explain why I had lied to him, but he cut me off.

"Rhys jut left with the army a little while ago, we'll meet him at the second field, but we need to go now"

My shoulders sagged; I don't know why I expected him to not be mad at me anymore.

"Carnel"

He opened up his arms and I walked between them, letting him pick me up in one smooth motion. I could have sworn his thumb went in a small circle at my hip before he stopped himself. He took off, the lurch in my stomach faint as I was too focused on us, on him.

"Carnel please"

He didn't take his eyes off the sky to look at me, his wings beating steadily as the field behind us grew further and further away. I hoped other things would stay in that camp, but I knew I was being too hopeful.

"Please stop ignoring me. Can we just talk about this like grown adults please?"

He scoffed. "Is that what we're pretending to be, because we both know none of us are close to mature."

The hint of a smile played on his lips and I bit my cheek to keep from doing the same.

"I'm sorry Carnel. I-"

My words were lodged in my throat and he squeezed me tighter softly, comforting me.

"You don't need to explain."

"No, no I do. It's the least you deserve."

"remember when I told you that I had fainted weeks ago, and they had to put me in the forest for me to awaken again?"

Carnel made a grumble noise in his throat and I continued.

"Well you were right; I am a liar-"

"Luna, I'm sorry I was too harsh-"

"No Carnel, you were right. I lied to you because when I fainted, I had a dream, except somehow, I know it's not just a dream, it was a vision. It showed me the final battle, it was what showed me the armor, but it also showed me what I have to do." I swallowed deeply before continuing.

"There is a prophecy Elain saw when I first landed here. 'A day will come where all is lost but vines and leaves save us all. Another world, a new gift, queen of rocks and life to stop the strife.'" The words left my lips easily seeing as I had played with them countless times in my head when I first heard it.

"I am the only one who can finish this war Carnel, it's why I was put here. So that's why I always will put myself first, because I saw how many people died in my vision alone, and I realized then that I would do everything in my power to stop it from happening, from letting the people I love be killed because what I saw-"

Small tears had formed on the rim of my eyes and I blinked furiously to keep them from spilling. I was done with crying for today, for a long while.

"I understand. I could never, never blame you for fighting for others. As much as it kills me, to fight against every thought and instinct in my body I want you to know Luna, that I will be right next to you every step of the way, and I want you to know that you do not have to do this alone. The prophecy may say that you save us, but it doesn't say you have to do it by yourself. Together Luna." His eyes flicked to mine for the quickest second before rising back to scan the landscape, but it was enough for me to see the emotion in his eyes, the promise.