●~Not All There Anymore~● |BEING REWRITTEN|

|8| Didn't Expect You To Love Me Anyways

"Kacchan... Kacchan, she's so mad. I messed up so bad!" Katsuki knew the boy was crying and racked his brain for ways to calm him down.

"Hey, hey, calm down Izuku. Hey, where are you, 'Zuku? You're not hurt, are you?" Katsuki tugged at his hair, trying to ground himself. Izuku wasn't going to calm down if Katsuki was panicking.

"I- I'm in my closet. It's dark, Kacchan. She won't stop yelling. Kacchan, I feel like I'm suffocating! The air is so thick, and all I can hear is explosions! Kacchan, there's writing on the walls. It's the same words on my desk. Kacchan, the walls are laughing at me! They're all laughing at me, they're all blaming me!" Izuku continued to sob as Katsuki's heart felt like it stopped. He knew Izuku was talking about middle school, the way kids had laughed and wrote horrible comments on his desk. He knew Izuku felt that he was being blamed because of Siomachi.

"Are you hurt?" Katsuki asked again. "Did she hit you or anything? Or is she just yelling?" Katsuki knew there was no way Siomachi was just yelling. Izuku wouldn't be crying nearly as hard if that were true. Hell, there wouldn't be a panic attack in the first place!

"She- she threw a vase at me. It shattered against my arm, and now there's so much blood. Kacchan, I keep thinking I'm back at the store. I don't wanna be a criminal! I didn't wanna steal anything, I swear! Kacchan, there's so much blood! So, so much blood. I'm still picking out the pieces! Kacchan, she's so mad..." Katsuki saw only red as his mind filled with rage.

"Hey, hey. It's okay, you locked the door, right? She can't hurt you if you locked the doors." Katsuki held onto the one thread of hope as panic slowly filled him up inside. Not him. Anyone but him. Please don't let him be hurt. He doesn't deserve a single damn thing that's happened to him. Not a single damn thing!

"Y- yeah, the doors are locked. But she keeps coming up here. She keeps pounding on the door, and throwing bottles at it. Kacchan, I pissed her off when she was drunk! She's gonna kill me!" The sobs just wouldn't stop, filling up Katsuki's ears until he couldn't hear anything else either.

"Hey, hey, you're gonna be fine, okay? It's gonna be okay, I swear. You're gonna be just fine." Katsuki cursed himself for his horrible tactics, but he had zero idea as to how to make this better. He had always been right there during a panic attack, holding him and warming his hands up just enough to keep Izuku grounded. Never on a phone call.

"Kacchan- Kacchan! The voices are back, they want me to hurt again! I don't know what to do! What did I do wrong, Kacchan?! I swear, I didn't mean to be a bad person! Please Kacchan, help me! Please..." Izuku sobbed again and again, repeating the same words as if it were a mantra. Katsuki took in a deep breath before letting it out, making sure it was loud enough for Izuku to hear.

"Hear that, Izuku? That's my breathing. I'm calm, and my breathing is even. It's easier to breathe when you're calm. So try and match it, okay? You're not a bad person, okay? You're amazing, and things have happened that aren't fair. But it's not your fault. Okay? You've gotta listen to me, Izuku." Katsuki slightly relaxed when he heard Izuku try to match Katsuki's loud but even breath.

"Okay. I don't know if this works, but I read it somewhere. It might help you calm down, okay?" Hearing no response, Katsuki proceeded. "Okay... what are three things you see?" Katsuki hoped and prayed Izuku wouldn't think he saw things that weren't really there.