Love Or Sin ✅

Part: 21 I hate you

A shocking update ahead

"You love me too, right?" He widened his eyes in utter shock as she asked after holding his hand. He was not expecting this question from her. How did she come to know?

Her beautiful smile was making him weak. He had always wished to see her this smile and now after finally seeing that smile, he didn't want to snatch away her beautiful smile by saying no. He didn't want to break her heart.

"Think about Shivansh. You can't say yes." He just opened his mouth to say yes but closed his mouth back jerking away her hand listening to his mind. He suddenly brayed with laughter. She narrowed her brows in confusion and her smile faded.

"Are you living in a dream world? Like seriously you think that I love you." He laughed louder.

Shehnaaz was utterly shocked because she was not expecting this kind of reaction from him. She was really happy thinking that he loved her too. Even after seeing this reaction, her heart was still not ready to believe that Sidharth didn't love her.

"Yes, I seriously think that you love me. Shivansh has told me everything that you love a girl but she is married. I am sure that girl is me because I can see that in your eyes that you love me too." Shehnaaz said every word confidently, looking into his eyes. She shut his mouth with her confidence. She couldn't fall weak at this moment. She knew that he was lying. Her heart knew that he loved her too. She was just listening to her heart at that moment.

"It's just the coincidence, Shehnaaz. You are just Shivansh's wife for me and nothing else. I am just bearing you from the last night for Shivansh. I was quiet until now because of Shivansh. But today you crossed all the limits. How can you even think that I love you?" Her lips drew down. His words were heartbreaking for her. Tears automatically streamed down her cheeks.

He immediately turned around because he couldn't control his tears from falling down his cheeks after seeing tears in her eyes. He turned around to compose himself and wipe the tears. He closed his eyes and pursed his lips to control himself from crying. He was breaking her heart and his heart was breaking more than her. He couldn't see her in pain but he was giving her pain. He was feeling so helpless at that moment and his heart was constantly apologising to her. He was feeling so wretched.

"I can never love you, Shehnaaz." He spoke, having tears in his eyes and still facing his back to her. Shehnaaz cried badly listening to this, looking at him. After all this, her heart was still not ready to believe that he didn't love her.

Sidharth was about to walk away but Shehnaaz jumping out of bed rushed to him. She stopped him by grasping his hand and said, "look into my eyes and say that you don't love me." She still had hope that he loved her.

"Don't make me do this, Shehnaaz, please. I can't break your heart more. I just can't..." he murmured to himself squeezing his eyes shut. Shehnaaz was making things more difficult for him. It was already getting difficult for him to face her and now she wanted him to say no, looking into her eyes.

"You have to do this for Shivansh, Sidharth. You have to make her believe that you don't love him or else she will never be able to move on from you and she will never be able to fall in love with Shivansh again." Sidharth's mind again encouraged him to break the heart of the poor soul more. Like every time Sidharth listened to his mind and made himself ready to make her believe that he didn't love her.

He turned around after wiping his tears. He pulled her toward himself holding her arms. After making his heart of stone, he lied, looking into her eyes directly. "I don't love you, Shehnaaz." Shehnaaz was utterly shocked. She was staring at him incredulously with her eyes wide open. He broke her all hope with those words.

"I don't know why I just still can't believe that you don't love me. My heart is not letting me believe that you don't love me. My heart is still saying to me that you are lying, Sidharth." Shehnaaz was sniffing and hiccuping while telling him whatever was going on in her heart at that time. At that moment Sidharth just wanted to hug her tightly and wanted to tell her that she is right and how much he love her. But he was so helpless because he wanted to protect his friendship and for that, he would have to make her believe that he didn't love her at any cost. He would have to break her already broken heart. It would be difficult but he could do anything for his friendship. He had made his mind that he would always choose his friendship over love.

He knew, he was doing wrong with her but he had no other option. He knew, if he fall weak and confess his love now then in the future Shehnaaz would never be able to move on from him after knowing that he also loved her. It was hard but he had accepted that she could only be in his heart, not in his life.

"Shehnaaz stop this drama. It's your mistake to fall in love with me after having a husband like Shivansh." He shouted, pushing her away from himself. Shehnaaz was looking at him unbelievably.

"You think if you do this drama and I will accept that I love you. Never, I can never love the girl like you who can stoop so low. Oh now I understand, last night whatever happened, it was planned by you, you wanted to come close to me. How can you stoop so low, Shehnaaz? I am pity of Shivansh that he fell in love with a girl like you." Sidharth was out of his mind. He just wanted to make her believe in his words. He was saying anything without even thinking about her feelings and what she would be feeling at that moment. He was crushing her heart.

Shehnaaz became completely numb listening to his words. The person whom she loved, was accusing her of something which she could never do. At that time she was hating herself for loving a person like him. She was utterly shattered.

"Thank you, Sidharth for showing me the truth of you. Now I am pity myself for falling in love with a person like you who thinks so low about me. I am hating myself for loving you. You just finished everything today. I hate you, Sidharth Shukla." Shehnaaz rushed out of his room after shouting at him. She was angry, hurt and completely broken at that moment. She was angry with herself for falling in love with him. She was hating herself more than him.

Sidharth burst into tears, slumping down on the floor as she left the room after slamming the door. He would never forgive himself for doing this with Shehnaaz. It was hurting him. He was feeling like he killed a part of him by breaking her heart. He was crying loudly in agony and apologising to Shehnaaz. He had no intention to hurt her, but he hurt her for making her believe that he never loved her. He accused her of something which she had never done. He made fun of her pure love and called her love a mistake. He was feeling like killing himself for doing all this with the innocent soul.

"Oh shit, What I did? Shehnaaz is not well. Where she will go ?" He freaked out when he realised that Shehnaaz was not in a condition to even walk.

"She couldn't be mine but still I will always protect her and love her. I will do anything to bring her back and take care of her. She needed me and I just can't leave her alone in that condition." He left the room after opening the door and slamming it back.

Sidharth was going crazy. He was not understanding what he was doing. He was hurting Shehnaaz badly choosing Shivansh's friendship. After what he did with her, he wanted to bring her back but he was not thinking that why would Shehnaaz come with him. He never wanted to see her face and wanted to move but destiny was having some other plans.

What do you think, Sidharth is right?

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Love Mehak

Stay Blessed