Home Is Where The Heart Is

Longings

She sighed in relief when she was sure that Kairav has finally fallen asleep . It wasn't easy to keep on listening to his plans of how he wanted to spent his time together with both her and him. She rested her head on the bedrest and sighed again , earlier she thought it would be difficult to ask Kairav to leave the Goenka villa but turns out he can do anything she asks him to, she smiled at that thought ! Wasn't Kartik the same back then? Would do anything in his power to make her happy.

But look at her destiny , if only he wouldn't have ask that question, today they both would have been together, celebrating each and every festival as a complete family. But no he had to spoil it by asking that question, sometimes she wonders who is at more fault him for asking that question or her , who ran away and in the attempt of punishing him , punished each and every member of their family and not only the family even her Kairav !

She wanted to scream and shout at him and then finally hug him and forget about the pain, and just move on with life , but life can never be that easy, or can it? It's complicated and unreasonable and unfair . And what both of them have done in the past can never be undone nor can things go back to the way they were. Tears kept flowing and she kept longing for him !

Kartik's POV
He was staring at the stars sitting on the swing in the garden area. He sigh for the 100th time this evening, his heart felt the same pain it felt on the day everyone said that Naira was dead. He kept resisting everyone, trying his best to explain to them that his Naira can't leave him just like this. They have lot more in store. If she leaves his life will technically end. That night had been one of the longest he'd ever lived, he kept looking at the door all night, hoping and wishing and praying that she'll walk back home, punch him and beat  him for asking that question and then he'll beg her to forgive him and things will turn out okay, or maybe not so okay but he'll still fight and win her back. What he'd never thought was losing her forever . When it was her first death anniversary, he, though reluctantly agreed to what everyone else thought. And from that day onwards a new Kartik appeared, the one who could fake his happiness so good that even if Naira ever came back he was sure she wouldn't be able to help but to think that he was happy .
But one person did saw him breaking down once, it was his mom and he'd cried more falling week in front of her, cause the pain seemed to never end. Day after day time passed and he breathe but never lived!
He has no idea how to live through this new hell. He has no idea why life keeps throwing him in such nasty situations where nothing but chaos and heartbreaks are an inevitable choice. He wants to scream but is scared enough that no one will understand the pain he withholds. Did anyone ever think about him and his feelings? The love which he was so proud of would be the reason he had a knife stabbed to his back, who'd thought?! He very well knows that he brought this upon himself by asking that question, but for once can people look at him and wonder what he'd feel at that very moment that made him so vulnerable to loose his sanity and trust all at once. He deserved the distance he received from her, but what about their child? How did without even giving him a chance she decided he won't be a good father? Was he so bad? Or was his mistakes bigger than his love?

He concluded his mistake was bigger than his love and alone tear escaped his eye. He wiped it away before he starts breaking again , that's when she came in front of him

'You can't let this chance go away Kartik,  you are lucky life has given you a second chance. Do something, make this right!' Swarna said sitting besides him on the swing .

Kartik laughed a humorless laugh and looked at her, he was anything but lucky. Infact he's sure he was the favorite victim of luck, cause no matter how badly he prayed for things to work out for him, and for some time things did work out good for him, just for him to realise later that it was a break before a more miserable time. He stopped expecting happiness and then she came back. The soul that was the key to his happiness.

'There's nothing I can do anymore. She doesn't want me near her and Kairav and that was crystal clear by her actions. And what do I do of the girl that now practically lives in my house and calls herself my wife Maa?' kartik asked

'The complicated situation is the one where you'd continue living like this not the one where you try to make  everything right, Kartik"

'I would  do everything in my power to make things right only if she wants it too. But I doubt that now. I have spent five years mourning the death of my love, atleast now I'm free of that'

'You don't have questions for her? Why she left, where she went? And what kept her so strong, she was alone,  no one by her side ! How did she manage everything? I don't doubt the fact that she can be independent but if we think a bit more she wasn't only pregnant but heartbroken too, Kartik. '

'I don't even have a right anymore to ask that question Maa. But I did ask her and she walked away saying that somethings can't get back together the way they were before.'

'If she comes and ask you to make things right for her, will you Kartik?'

'In a heartbeat!' He said staring into nothingness!

A few minutes passed before Kartik sprang to his feets. Swarna stood up too, surprised by his sudden enthusiasm.

'I'll be back in a while' before Swarna could ask him about where he plans to go this late, he spoke "I might not be deserving of her love anymore but I sure as hell am deserving of the answers I want, and it's already way to late to wait.!"

Swarna looked upon as he started the engine of the car and made his way to Singhania Sadan.
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Editor- niyati23

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