The Decision

Chapter 17

As the world around her seemed to spin, Lexa began to feel slightly dizzy as her brain tried to wrap itself around the words that she had just heard. They did it. They did it! They got in and actually found something and judging by the sound of Raven's voice, it had to be something pretty massive.

"Lexa," Clarke's voice suddenly filled her ears. "Lex?"
Lexa looked up to find Clarke staring at her with a suddenly softened expression.
"Are you okay?" Clarke questioned her carefully.
"I'm..." Lexa paused and shook her head, quickly schooling her features. "I'm sorry. I have to go," she said before turning and starting to walk away.
"Oh, so you do know how to use that word," Clarke's instantly clipped voice followed.
Lexa stopped and turned back to face her with a realization taking shape in her mind – Clarke didn't believe that she was sorry for what had happened. "Clarke," she shook her head. "I told you that I was sorry the night that I left."
"Yeah," Clarke scoffed lightly. "It probably would have been a little more convincing if you had actually meant it," she lightly spat before turning and walking away on her own.
Lexa didn't respond, instead choosing to simply just watch her walk away.

Breaking up with Clarke had been the most painful thing that she had ever done and nothing – nothing about it had been easy and what followed as the news of it spread wasn't any better either.

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Lexa sat defeated at her piano with the fingers of one hand dancing over the ivory keys and a bottle on gin gripped tightly in the other. She had ended things with Clarke and it had been the most devastating thing that she had ever experienced. Clarke was so heartbroken. She had fought and pleaded with tears streaming from her beautiful blue eyes and the only thing Lexa could do was repeat her position over and over, not showing the slightest bit of emotion. Twenty four hours ago she was warm and filled with love, now there was nothing, she was empty and cold.

Taking a long sip of the bottle, she watched blankly as her phone continued to flood with missed messages and calls.

It had been going off for hours.

O: What the actual fuck?
Raven: What the hell is going on??
Raven: Really, what the fuck is wrong with you?
O: Seriously?? Omg! What's the matter with you!?
Lincoln: What's going on? O is freaking out! What happened?
Bellamy: You said you wouldn't hurt her.
Lincoln: Bangkok? Lexa, what the hell are you doing?!

Missed Calls:
Bellamy (1)
Clarke (5)
Lincoln (3)
Octavia (4)
Raven (17)

Lincoln: Call me back!
Clarke: I don't understand. Please, talk to me.
Clarke: Why won't u take my calls??
Monty: That is just so messed up.
Clarke: Please, don't do this.
Raven: ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE, ASSHOLE! God! I'm going to kick your fucking ass!
Jasper: You're such an ass!
O: I swear to God, Lexa!!! Answer the phone!!
Clarke: Lexa, please...
O: I can't believe that after everything you would do this to her. I know how much she means to you! Everyone knows how much you two love each other. You need Clarke, as much as she needs you. Why are you doing this??? Come on, Lexa!

Bang! Bang! Bang! "Lexa!" Bang! Bang! "Open the door!!" Bang! Bang!!

As the sudden sound echoed through the apartment, Lexa jumped and slipped off the piano bench, falling to the floor and shattering the bottle in her hand. She sat for a moment, watching her blood pool on the shiny, cold marble before she heard Anya's voice boom. "Enough!"
"Where is she?" Lincoln questioned harshly.
"You need to stop," Anya stated firmly, with touch of annoyance in her voice. "There are things you don't understand."
"Then help me," Lincoln pleaded. "What the hell happened?"
"I made a decision," Lexa said as she stepped into the room. "That's what happened."
"Lexa, what the..." Lincoln began as he stepped forward.
Anya grabbed his arm and gave him a cautioning look. "Lexa," she said gently and redirected her glance, "you're bleeding."
"I fell. There was glass," Lexa explained as she rubbed the back of her head and grabbed her shirt off of the arm of the couch, quickly wrapping it around her hand. "But, I'm fine – it's fine," she shook her head.
Lincoln sighed. "Just tell me what's going on?"
"I just did." Lexa replied simply.
"You just up and decided to move to fucking Bangkok?" Lincoln asked, his voice heavy with annoyance.
"Yes," Lexa nodded.
"Why?" Lincoln shrugged in utter bewilderment.
"That's not your concern." Lexa answered blankly.
Lincoln's eyes widened instantly. "Not my concern? You're like my sister! Of course it's my fucking concern!"
Lexa just stared at him.