FBI, CIA, NSA, EIEIO, DDS, PHD, BBC, NFL, ABC WARNING:This novel is COPYRIGHTED 2015, all characters, and plots are property of JOHNSON, violators will be persucuted (Inquistion style).
Copyright 2015-2040
Rated PG
TV-PG
E10+
Unrestricted
I
Vladimir's glassy green eyes rapidly darted across the gleaming iPad screen, his mind was calculatating new stratagies; 'Wow, this game is really fun, more fun than I thought! And it's not scary at all!'
"VLAD!!!"
Vladimir was so startled that he jumped and missed a jumpscare in the nick of time. He turned to see his older brother, Iyche, standing behind him. Vladimir could feel an embrassed, humourous smile grow across his face. His brother had only a grimace.
"Vladimir! I told you to stay out of my room, and NOT to play my iPad without asking! It's for school only!"
"Iyche, really, I meant no harm, I was just examining it, and if it were only for school, why to you have so many computer games?"
Iyche sighed, he could not stand being angry at his brother, three years his junior, he just took the iPad, which Vladimir was offering. Iyche inspected it and found that it was not hurt in anyway. He decided to speak to Vladimir, "how was school?"
"Bad"
"Why?"
"Ummm, the teacher asked if we had the homework, and I didn't do it, because I digging a hole in the yard."
Iyche looked confused. "What was the assignment?"
"Thesis paper for the year."
Iyche's jaw dropped.
"YOU DIDNT DO YO' THESIS PAPER!?!?"
"No"
Iyche threw his head back, and closed his eyes, then he shook his head.
"Mom and Dad are going to kill you."
"Good, then I won't have to tell them that I got suspended."
"WHAT!"
"The teacher said I was stupid, so I slapped him."
Iyche knew that his brother was probably going to get arrested someday, and then Vladimir would be fine with it, he'd meet a lot of people like him.
II
Vladimir was very excited, his mean nextdoor neighbor had gone away to Wal-Mart, so Vladimir could explore his backyard. He hopped over the fence, and started walking all over his beautiful flowers, they were so soft to walk on. He poked around in all the bushes and trees, he even broke off a branch he liked so he could play lightsabre with it later. But his joy increased when he found that he had left his crawl space door unlocked, and he went inside of it. There were all sorts of wonderful things down there, moldy couchs, a cracked TV, some old dusty books, even a mummified snake. At the center of the crawl space, Vladimir found a deep hole, big enough for a person. He happily jumped into it.
He fell into a cavern, about 3 metres down. He looked straight ahead, to his amazement, he found that there was a light at the end. He began walking, relizing that his neighbor had an underground tunnel under his house, he only walked for about 3 minutes before coming out of the tunnel.
He had come out of a mountain, and was now in a gorgous forest in the prime of spring, with birdsong all around him, and the scent of pears nearby.
'Cool! A magical world!' he thought.
He walked among the pansies and looked to the sky, there was a blue sun that adorned the morning-rose sky. There was a small stream running nearby, and a hare dashed by Vladimir's feet as he walked. Vladimir plucked a fresh pear from a tree and bit into, it was the best pear ever.
"THIS PLACE IS AWESOME!!" He said, with his mouth full.
===NEXT TIME===
Male V/O: Vladimir, this place is hell, if had one brain cell you would have run back as fast as you could have.
TWO ARMIES ARE FIGHTING, WE SEE CANNONS, SWORDS, HORSES, AND GUNS.
MALE VO: You cannot save us.
A PRINCESS IS KNEELING BEFORE A MONSTER WHO IS HOLDING A SWORD ABOVE HER NECK, WE SEE HIM SWING IT DOWNWARD.
A WHOLE TOWN CATCHES ON FIRE, AND PEOPLE ARE RUNNING AND SCREAMING.
VLADIMIR LOOKS SCARED AND WE SEE HIM BACK AWAY SLOWLY FROM A SCARY LOOKING SHADOW.
A SATANIC LOOKING MAN IN BLACK ROBES APPEARS, HE HAS A BRASS JAW, AND ONE STEAMPUNK EYE.
SPOOKY DUDE (IN SPOOKY VOICE): I am the lord of all evil, good will fall.
VLADIMIR (SPEAKING TO EVIL LORD): Woah man, you need some ProActive!
VLADIMIR AND A FOX ARE TIED TOGETHER, A BABY DOLL WITH A HOOK AND NO EYES IS FACING THEM
IT SPEAKS IN A DEMONIC VOICE: Who's next?
EXCITING ADVENTURE MUSIC PLAYS
Next Episode: THE WORLD OF SCARY-41 Days Before March 1st
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Hate Mountain
FantasyA serial novel featuring Vladimir Kutchuvuch, a 16-year old protagonist who can not mind his own business and discoveres a portal to LaLaLand, where a bloody civil war is underway. The war is between two factions; the Luvs, who want to kill every li...
