Sunset Lovers

Intro

I want a break in life.

Sa loob ng apat na taon mula nang makapagtapos ako ng kolehiyo, puro trabaho lang ang inatupag ko. Rest days at holidays lang talaga ang pahinga. Never ko ginamit ang vacation leave ko kasi mas gusto kong i-monetized na lang kaysa gamitin. Marami kasi akong pinag-iipunan.

Though sa unang dalawang taon naman nang pagtatrabaho ko ay may masaya akong dating life. I had a boyfriend for two years until I declined his marriage proposal to me which lead us to growing apart from each other to him breaking up with me. We broke up two years ago and it's still kinda taking its toll on me. Hindi dahil sa hindi pa ako nakaka-move on, pero dahil sa pamilya at mga kaibigan ko. Hindi nila gets 'yong side ko. Or should I say na hindi talaga nila inintindi kasi 'di naman nila ako pinakinggan.

Tulad nila, I also believed sa 'timeline' na pinaniniwalaan nila. Magtatapos sa kolehiyo, magtatrabaho, mag-aasawa at bubuo ng pamilya. Ganyan din ang nasa isip ko noong bata pa ako. Pero as I grow older, I realize that there's more to this life that I haven't explored yet and I'm not yet ready to settle with marriage. Marami pa akong gustong gawin. Sabi nila, p'wede ko pa rin naman daw gawin 'yong mga gusto kong gawin while being married, but I doubt it.

I was only 23 years old when my ex-boyfriend proposed to me at ang hindi alam ng pamilya ko at ng mga kaibigan ko, noong taon din na 'yon balak magpakasal ni Lance. I wasn't ready that time and not yet ready until now that I'm already 25. At ayaw kong pumasok sa isang bagay na alam kong hindi pa ako handa. Sure, I also thought of Lance as my lifetime partner, pero it's too soon for marriage. It might fail since I'm not ready.

Hindi ko pinagsisihan 'yong naging desisyon ko kahit na nasaktan ako sa pag-iwan sa akin ni Lance. Kahit na nagalit ang pamilya ko sa akin pati ang mga kaibigan ko na mga kaibigan din ni Lance since we have the same circle of friends.

Mula nang mag-break kami, wala pa akong nagiging boyfriend ulit, though I tried dating, but nothing worked out. So, I really focused myself in doing the things I really want for me to be finally ready for the next chapter of my life.

Kaya heto ako ngayon, I filed for a one-month vacation which the HR approved since I've been a good employee.

Isa sa gusto kong gawin ito: ang magkaroon ng mahabang bakasyon at gawin 'yong mga simpleng bagay na gusto kong gawin. Road trip, watching sunset, hearing the waves of the sea... Just things that will give me peace of mind and calmness. I feel exhausted for the last four years of my life with relationship issues and work and I feel the need of healing of nature.

Kaya heto ako, nasa kahabaan ng daan at tinatahak ang daan papunta sa una kong destinasyon nang mag-isa. Busy 'yong dalawang friends ko from work kaya mag-isa lang ako. Wala namang problema since I also enjoy being alone.

I don't know how my one-month vacation will turn out since I don't have a concrete plan, but I hope, it will be a good one.