𝐔𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 | 𝐊𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐬 𝐁𝐚𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐗 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐎𝐂

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟐 - Poor Aunt Josephine

"Violet, Klaus, Veronica and Sunny. By the time you read this note, my life will be at it's end. My heart is as cold as Ike, and I find my life inbearable. I know your children may not understand the sad life of a dowadger, or what would have lead...leadled me to this desperate akt...but please know that I am much happier this way. As my last will and testament, I leave you three in the care of Captain Sham, a kind and honorable men. Please think of me kindly, even though I'd done this terrible thing. Josephine Anwhistle." Klaus read out loud. "It can't be..." Veronica whispered. "Why would she do this?" She continued.

~~~~~~~

Violet had rang Mr. Poe and read the letter to him over the phone. "As my last will and testament, I leave you three in the care of Captain Sham, a kind and honorable men. Please think of me kindly even though I'd done this terrible thing." She read aloud to him on the phone. "Yes, yes, I understand. I'll tell them. Of course, I'll tell them. I promise I'll tell them. Goodbye." She said in a fake joy tone before hanging up. Violet looked at them in disappointment. "Mr. Poe says we can always rely on Mulctuary Money Management." She stated with a dismayed look. "Great, with him, we aren't going to get anywhere." Veronica huffed, raising her arms in arrogance. "Come on, Vera. We can't give up now." Violet responded. "It's not about giving up, it's that when he comes around, we can barely do anything. Don't you remember with Uncle Monty?! He caught on the last second!" The brunette exclaimed. The Baudelaires went silent, they knew she was right but they couldn't do anything about it. Aunt Josephine was gone and Mr Poe was already on his way. Veronica then sighed and said, "I know we can't do anything about it now. Let's just wait for him to get here and see if we can convince him to believe us...this time." 

"I just can't believe it." Klaus said, taking the note from Violet. "It's all there in ink and shaky handwriting, Klaus. Aunt Josephine is dead and left us in the care of Count Olaf, or Captain Sham as she put it." Veronica explained. Klaus didn't listen to what she said and only kept re-reading the note. "It's not right. There's something funny about this note." The three girls stared at Klaus in disbelief. Did he seriously think this whole thing was funny? "There's nothing funny about a woman throwing herself out a window." Violet said in reply with eyes of arrogance. "Not funny as in funny joke. Funny as in a funny...smell." Klaus told her, justifying what he meant. "What are you talking about, Klaus?" Veronica said with an eyebrow raise. "Here, look, in the very first sentence, she says 'My life will be at it's end.'" Veronica read the note from Klaus' hands and saw what he meant. "And now it is!" Violet responded. "No, I see what he means. She says 'it's,' I-T-apostrophe-S, meaning 'it is.' She means I-T-S. That's a sizeable grammatical error."

"Who cares about grammatical errors when she jumped out a window?" Violet questioned. "Aunt Josephine would've cared." Veronica replied. "She told us that grammar was the greatest joy in life." Violet shook her head towards the brunette. "That's not enough. No matter how much she liked grammar, she says found her life unbearable." She explained to her. "That's another error! She didn't say she found her life unbearable, with a U. She said she found her life inbearable, with an I. It's not even a word." Klaus said, backing up his brunette friend. "Our situation isn't inbearable. It's unbearable. Aunt Josephine left us in the care of Captain Sham and I don't know what we can do about it." Violet sighed. "I wish we'd never read Mr Poe that note. Then we could've torn it up and forged a new one in her handwriting that didn't mention...Captain Sham." Klaus said to the girls. "Wouldn't it be difficult to imitate her handwriting?" Violet asked. "Maybe it's not her handwriting at all." Veronica suggested. Her eyes widened, that's when she realised...

"Olaf." Sunny babbled.

~~~~~~~

Mr Poe arrived a while later. Veronica and the Baudelaires explained the entire thing to him, starting off with Captain Sham's arrival and to Josephine's deadly jump out her window. But of course, before Mr Poe could even say a reply, he coughed in his handkerchief.  "Forgery? That's a serious charge." Mr Poe said. "Not as serious as murder." Violet then stated. "Which is what that slimy Count Olaf did." Veronica sneered. "He murdered Aunt Josephine and forged a note." Klaus added. "Again with Count Olaf. I must say, other than a gaping, middle-aged woman shaped-hole in the window, I can see no sign of struggle or a break-in." Veronica sucked in her lips, full of anger. She was fed up with Mr Poe not being able to believe them, a youngster's words should matter more than what adults should think children are to believe. "We told you. Count Olaf didn't have to break in Aunt Josephine's house." Violet explained to Mr Poe. "He was in disguise and Aunt Josephine fell for it, hook, line and sinker." Klaus added, Veronica quietly giggled. "Please, Klaus, there's no time for fishing jokes." Mr Poe said to the glassed-eye boy. "Anyways, there's a very simple way to tell who wrote this note. We simply have to compare it to Aunt Josephine's handwriting." He then suggested to the children. "That's...that's actually an excellent idea." Veronica stammered in reply. "You are very intelligent children but the most intelligent people sometimes need the help of a banker."