The Odds | ✓

7

the stars in neo's eyes

-

Okay, now Aden is convinced that he's being stared at.

Also, it turns out he was wrong about two things.

First of them being, Neo has obviously not forgotten about his existence after greeting him once and then going on with his evening. Quite the opposite, actually.

Aden has no idea how they ended up like this, but Neo is sitting beside Aden by the bonfire — Aden who has his knees almost pulled to his chest, his eyes glazed, expression lost, and lips parted slightly in permanent stupefaction — with his head on Aden's shoulder.

Aden doesn't remember the last time he inhaled a proper amount of air, but that's the least of his worries right now.

All he can think about are incomplete, incoherent thoughts that are fleeting butterflies fluttering inside his head; much like the tickle in his chest every time Neo mutters something under his breath that doesn't make a lot of sense. Can he feel how still I am? Am I beginning to sweat? Do I smell weird? What if I breathe too hard and end up making him pull away?

The entire left side of his body is beginning to cramp up with lack of movement and a part of Neo's weight resting on it, but again, not a worry that Aden thinks he's going to prioritize, really.

Second thing Aden was wrong about, by the way, was him believing that he would suddenly grow completely oblivious to the eyes around him — them. On them.

Because right now, all he can feel on his skin are stares. They somehow poke him harder than the cold does, so he pointedly avoids them all so he won't feel the possible frost from them in his own eyes.

"Aden..."

He blinks at the mention of his name, eyes getting watery upon coming back into focus because Aden was clearly not blinking this whole time.

Turning too quick to realize that it's a big mistake, Aden finds his face way, way closer to Neo's than he was ready for. His breath hitches in his throat when he sees Neo's clear blue eyes already looking up at him, the orange of the fire shining in them like lava in the ocean.

Aden quickly looks away and awkwardly clears his throat.

He's not as flustered as he usually would be, though. It's probably because unlike the usual smart, confident Neo from school, or the happy, at-ease Neo from the café, this Neo is vulnerable. And Aden doesn't want both of them to be vulnerable at the same time.

"I'm not drunk," Neo adds after a beat of silence, and Aden wants to laugh. He really does. Because Neo is drunk. Maybe not enough to be completely out of it, but enough to not realize the consequences, or the effects of his actions. Especially on Aden. But Neo's soft hair is tickling the side of his neck and it's more distracting than Aden would ever admit out loud.

Forcing himself out of his stupor, he stares straight ahead as he says, "Are you sure?"

Neo hums softly, and Aden doesn't know why he hears a smile in his voice. There's silence between them again, this time a little longer before Neo lets out a tiny chuckle and says, "Not really."

Aden doesn't know what to say. So he doesn't.

"Hey, Aden."

Ignoring the flutter in his chest and the tingle that runs down his spine at the way his name sounds when Neo says it, Aden whispers, "Yeah?"

"Wanna know a secret?"

And because Aden knows what it's like to be staggeringly embarrassed about your own words after they've already left your mouth, courtesy of his anxiety and years of overthinking, he replies with a simple, "Depends."

Neo's voice is a little smaller when he asks, "On what?"

"Is it embarrassing?"

It takes Neo a few seconds to answer. "... kinda?"

Feeling his heart grow a little heavy at what he's about to reply with, Aden sighs. "Then no."

Neo grows silent again, and Aden is left to wonder if his heart is beating louder than the noise around them. It probably is. Because he can't find another way to explain why he can't hear anyone else over the weird sound in his ears.

"What if this is the only time I can say it?"

Neo's voice is uncharacteristically small, and Aden feels his chest ache. But there's no way he's going to sit there and pretend like he's okay with knowing any of this boy's secrets when he's possibly already going to be embarrassed about tonight in the morning.

Yeah, Aden wouldn't love anything more than getting to know Neo more.

But this isn't the way he wants it to happen.

Even if it's the only way, he isn't going to take it.

"More reason for me to stop you, don't you think so?" Aden replies.

Another pause. Then, "Those are a lot of words."

Aden can't help but laugh. Now he's definitely sure that Neo is drunk enough to make a mistake.

"You wanna make a deal?" he asks, turning his head again, and this time when Neo looks at him, and even though Aden can feel his breath on his chin, he focuses on looking the boy straight in the eye.

Neo nods.

"If you still remember this by tomorrow," Aden starts, speaking slowly so Neo doesn't miss anything, "And still want to talk to me about your little secret..." His voice takes on a teasing lilt when he realizes that Neo looks like a little child with his eyes wide and focused on Aden's face, "...then come by the café. Like you always do."

Aden wants to tell himself that he knows what this is about. With how Neo has been behaving all night — he really does want to tell himself that he knows.

But at the same time, he doesn't want to get his hopes high.

So just like he's been waiting and suffering for months over his little crush on the boy currently looking at him with stars in his eyes, Aden tells himself that he can wait — and suffer, of course — a little more.

-

a/n

classes starting tomorrow >:(

i miss talking to y'all so please tell me how your day was, what you have been up to, how you're doing. ily. thank you so much for reading <3