She's pregnant and we are not even divorced yet. How did that happen? I mean I know how it happens, but how and when did that happen? He lied to me when he said he wasn't sleeping with her. BS. Everyone was telling me that the had a thing going when she was visiting up here.
I can't believe this I feel so hurt and betrayed by both of them. How do you leave your wife of 9 years and jump into bed with someone else. The worse part is how does effect the children, to grow up knowing that their sibling is also a cousin to them and to their mother and other sibling. What was she thinking, I guess she wasn't. I mean what is it to her anyway? She has no idea how much this hurt. It's fucked up that this is happening and I can't do anything about it.
How am I supposed to live with news in my life and yet still want him to come home and be a family? I do though I want him to come back and work things out between us, I am hurt but it does not change that I still love him so much.
Just sitting here listening to our song makes it worse, I have to get over this and I have to let him go, but I don't want to I want him back. I want to prove to him that I have changed and that I am getting better.
I am taking this news really hard, so much that I took my sleeping pills and decided to take a bath. Thank god for my oldest child (from my first marriage) waking me up or I would have been a goner.
Can't let go of all this hurt, even talking to my therapist about it is not helping. Not sure where to go from here.
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Thoughts Over The Years
Non-FictionReal emotions and thoughts as the author processes through their crumbling marriage and their 2nd divorce and losing their children, and all the feelings that come as an aftermath as the the author enters a new relationship and the next chapter. the...
