Hibernation

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Summary; Bucky had always wondered what his life would have been if things had been different If it hadn't been him.

I own nothing but the story itself. The characters mentioned and used are not my property.

Through his P.O.V



Back then, I was sure that the heart I left behind Still lay somewhere hidden within me. I was sure that it stayed somewhere buried deep within the debts of my being, frozen. Because despite as lost as I was, I knew it had to still be in there somewhere.

I had hope, no matter how slim it may have been...

Before, I was certain the man I was in the past somehow was there too, wanting to feel the world for himself instead of just watching through tired, glass eyes.

In the past, I could have only wondered how life would have been if it hadn't been me... If I had been a normal man instead and I was certain I would be happier.

But then I found you...

And I realized something...

We've lived our lives so much more different from one another, many years apart from each other, and yet here we are.

And we've only come to this point because of everything that happened in our pasts, because of everything that happened to us back then as individuals. Now when I wonder about how life would have been if it hadn't been me, I still think I would have been a normal man, but now I can see I would have never met you...

We would have never crossed paths, and that would mean never being changed by you...

I would have never had that luck, and what's much more, My misfortune would fall on another too. In my place, someone else would have taken in the torture, and I could never wish that on anyone else.

So then instead of mindless pondering, I forget about that ridiculous thought

- that selfish idea.

I always forget about that possibility the second I think of you.

Before You, I thought that was the only way to be happy, to somehow reverse time.

To wish endlessly to go back to that man of the past...

But I've learned that as we live on, we become just a little different than the person we were the day before. And then I'd have this crazy idea, another meaningless one, imagining you coming to my time instead.

Could you ever imagine?

Because I have...

If I had been the same idiot from before, the Bucky before I became the winter soldier, I wouldn't have appreciated you. The man from before would have been careless because he didn't know what it meant to live so emptily.

Since being trapped in darkness for so long, finding my flicker of light in you made me want to keep you. It made me do everything possible to ensure you wouldn't doubt me.

As we live on, We lose a little bit more of our past selves, yes... But together we will grow.

Together we will change, influenced by one another.

We live our lives, wandering to the ends of the earth without knowing what's ahead of the road and I'm fine not knowing where the road will lead, but only if the trip can be with you... As I look at you now, you look even more beautiful than the day I met you. The second your mouth opens to speak, I close my eyes, letting the last second of reminiscence wash over me because I don't have to think of the past anymore.

I only have to think of the future: our future.

With a smile to your softly painted lips, you answer for the world to hear, you say the last two words left to utter,

" I do..."

I don't need to be told twice before I lean into you, and take the first kiss of many in what will be our awaiting future together.

Your lips taste like sweetness, always leaving me craving more, but for the sake of our guests, I tear away from you. Looking down the small stage we stand at, and trailing my eyes to each and every face attending, I notice it's only a few people, but they're everyone we've come to hold dear.

I see Steve as he gives the widest grin I've ever seen the little punk muster, he's at my side, holding a hand to my shoulder, almost crushing it with how happy he is.

The entire time he's been there, right beside me since the beginning. And on this day, I didn't want it to be any different. There wouldn't be any other way to do this than to have him as my best man.

Sam's there right in front of the crowd, Standing up immediately, his hands enthusiastically clapping, giving me a smug little look because long ago, I'd run to him to help me win you over.

He'd been the one to give me pointers on a game I'd long retire from, just to impress you.

I see Stark and Pepper Potts, and they are of course sitting with one another.

She's slapping his arm with a halfhearted glare being thrown at him, but a small smile twitching at the corners of her lips. He tries to look like this is the most cliche thing he's ever come across, a slow eye roll acted out when he sees your watching him.

He makes it seem like he's gonna throw up, and it makes you giggle, the sound being music to my ears.

He's acting and it's noticeable because he can't hide the obvious grin etching itself onto his face.

I shake my head, knowing he's only teasing you.

He's a good friend of yours, possibly your best besides ( best friend's name ), going as far as to offer to pay for the entire ceremony, which wouldn't have been much of a big deal to him, but even then you just couldn't accept.

This reminds me of how you're so humble, and it's another reason I love you.

Tasha looks at you with so much joy, it's astonishing to see so much written on her usually impassive face, I'm actually impressed. Only the love she has for you could make her beam so much and break her mask because she cherishes you just that much.

Something about you has always made her feel tenderness for you, though she never spoke of it...

It was clear when she spoke of you to me. It was obvious when she threatened to personally castrate me if I ever thought of harming you. I had never planned to, but even then I felt a shiver coarse through me.

She sits next to both Clint and Bruce, her hand just barely grazing the dark-haired man, going unnoticed by everyone else around them, and it seems that's how they like things.

They have their own way of loving...

From their venture, my eyes shift back to you as you wave the bouquet in the air, signaling the ladies to take a step forward for the little game.

You can't wait to see who catches it, jumping with excitement before swinging it up.

I look at you...I look at just you alone and I can't be any happier to have taken the long road here. Before, I was sure that the heart I left behind Still lied hidden within me somewhere, and I was right.

It just took meeting you to awaken it from its hibernation...

' (f/n)... Doll...'

I wouldn't trade my life for another, I wouldn't hope for a different past, because we can always make a better future together.






Fuck...this was kinda corny, I'm so sorry. ┐(°⊱,°)┌


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