storms

128 4 6
                                    

Word count: 1442
Warnings: small mentions of abuse and trauma
Prompt: Remus is scared during a storm, Sirius comforts him
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The loud pitter patter of the heavy rain was the only sound heard in the Gryffindor dormitories that night. To some, like James and Peter, the sound could be overlooked, or even be soothing, but not to Sirius and Remus. Sirius was a very light sleeper, even the lightest of noises woke him up, courtesy of living in an abusive household where it was common occurrence for his parents to wake him in the middle of the night, and when they did, Sirius had better be up and ready on the spot. He learned that the hard way.

On the other hand, Remus wasn't so much bothered by the sound, but scared of it. Remus knew it was an irrational fear, he had been teased by many about his fear of thunderstorms, but they didn't really know why he was so terrified of them. The truth was, many years ago, ten years ago actually, the night Remus had been bitten by none other than Fenrir Greyback, the night that had changed his life forever, had been a stormy night. Now everytime he heard the sound of thunder, Remus was brought back to that night, that night when scared, helpless, fragile, four year old him had been frozen in fear as the werewolf had taken his freedom from him.

A bright flash of lightning lit up the room, and Remus snuggled deeper into his comforter in anticipation of the loud boom of thunder that would inevitably follow. When the loud sound echoed through their room, Remus flinched and squeezed his eyes shut, trying with all his might to focus on any thought other than ones about that fateful night but to no avail. Remus tried willing his tears away, he tried to stay strong and not let the past define him but he couldn't, as another boom of thunder sounded and struck down all the resolve Remus had slowly been building up.

Sirius had been trying to tune out the noise from the storm for around ten minutes now, but he couldn't manage to fall asleep. Eventually, he just resorted to staring up at nothing. He knew he wouldn't get any sleep with all this noise. He considered going down to the common room to work on some essays, because yes, contrary to popular belief Sirius did care about his academic performance, but he couldn't really afford another detention on top of the ones he already had for various pranks he had pulled. Though now that he thought of it, he doubted Lily or Moony would give him detention for doing homework in the middle of the night. Maybe Moony would take some points simply because Sirius had woken him up, and tiredly grumble something along the lines of "its three in the fucking morning pads honestly" and head back to sleep.

Sirius smiled at the thought, but it quickly dropped when he heard a quiet, scared, almost pained whimper sound from the closed curtains of Remus' bed. He turned a curious glance towards the werewolf's bed, though he heard nothing else. Sirius figured it was probably just his mind playing tricks on him and went back to his thoughts. However, when another boom of thunder sounded, Sirius knew he wasn't imagining the quiet sobs coming from Remus's direction. Cautiously, Sirius got up and quietly approached Remus's bed. As the sobs grew louder the closer he got, Sirius felt a crack in his heart get deeper and deeper with every sob. He hated it when Remus was hurt or sad, especially when all he wanted to do was help but he couldn't. Not wanting to wait any longer, Sirius tore the curtains open.

"Remmy?" He whispered in a concerned tone.

Startled, Remus yelped and flinched away from Sirius. In the dim moon loght being filtered through the small window of their dormitory, Sirius could see the still running tears on Remus's face, making his heart ache.

"Oh it's you," breathed out Remus once he realized it was only Sirius.

"You scared me," he mumbled out.

"I'm sorry," answered Sirius, sounding like a wounded puppy.

Remus looked up at Sirius and felt his heartbeat accelerate. He didn't know why, but this happened anytime he would find himself alone with Sirius. Almost as if he were excited for something to happen, but he didn't know what. Concern swirled in the silver pools that were Sirius' eyes, which were fixed on Remus' cheeks, which he now realized were probably tear streaked. Remus hastily wiped away at his tears though he doubted that would change much, Sirius had already seen them, and Remus was willing to bet their sound was what had drawn Sirius to his bed in the first place.

"So, are you okay?" Asked Remus trying and failing at an unbothered expression.

"Am I okay? Are you okay?!? What's wrong?!" Exclaimed Sirius incredulously. Here was Remus, crying with this terrified look on his face, and he was asking Sirius if he was okay?!

"I'm fine, no need to worry about me," said Remus dismissively.

"You're crying," stated Sirius dumbly.

"I'm fine Sirius, really, you can go back to sleep," said Remus whilst turning his back to Sirius, assuming that he would go back to his bed. Sirius did no such thing, actually, he did the exact opposite.

"No," he stated decisively, as he sat down on Remus' bed making the latter turn back towards his raven haired friend.

"Pads?" Said Remus, confused by the intense look Sirius was giving him. Like he was mad but sad at the same time, yet understanding and heart broken, and it made goosebumps erupt on his arms which were left bare by the t-shirt he wore to sleep.

"I said no. You're always doing that, shutting yourself off and pretending everything is okay when it clearly isn't. I just wanna help you Remus, it breaks my heart to see you hurt, and helpless when you won't let me help, like I'm clawing at a brick wall trying to get to you and I can't bring it down. Please just let me help you."

By the end of Sirius' speech, tears were streaming down his face, and Remus' cheeks were close to being submerged again.

Remus silently held up his shaky hand to Sirius' cheek and started gently stroking away the tears, though this affectionate gesture seemed to only make more tears spill out of Sirius' beautiful shining eyes.

"I'm just so scared of hurting you Padfoot, I don't wanna drag you into my insignificant problems," finally admitted Remus.

"The only way you could hurt me is by pushing me away. Please Remus," said Sirius brokenly, tightly clutching Remus' retreating hand in his.

"It's stupid," finally breathed out Remus after a torturous minute of Remus looking into Sirius' eyes with an unreadable expression.

"If it's bothering you it's not stupid," said Sirius reassuredly.

"I'm afraid of storms," admitted Remus so quietly that the noise of the rain almost drowned it out.

"Oh," simply said Sirius, not knowing what to reply.

Hesitantly, Sirius moved closer to Remus and tantively wrapped his arms around the taller boy's torso. Remus tensed at the unexpected contact, something Sirius took as a sign to retreat, though when he made to unwrap his arms, Remus held them in place.

So they laid there, Sirius' arms around Remus who would jump or snuggle in closer to Sirius anytime they heard thunder rumble, both boys lost in their own thoughts.

"There was a storm that night," said Remus out of the blue.

"The night that," Remus trued continuing before choking on the fresh tears that had started falling.

"Shhh, it's okay Moony, take your time," said Sirius, soothingly stroking Remus' hair.

"The night when," started Remus again after a moment.

"When I was four, when, when Greyback attacked me," finally blurted out Remus before bursting back into tears that Sirius wiped away in the same way Remus had done for him earlier.

"I know they aren't related," said Remus after his tears had quietened down.

"But everytime I hear thunder, all I can think of is how terrified I was that night," finished Remus with a shiver that came from recalling that moment.

"Then i'll just help you think of something else," stated Sirius simply, and Remus didn't know if he had imagined it, but he felt Sirius' lips brush gently over the top of his head.

And so they laid there, quietly talking about random, silly things until they both fell asleep, and for the first time in years, both peacefully slept through a storm, not bothered about the noises or the memories that they brought.

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