chocolate milkshakes | rodrick heffley

chapter six: breakdown

an arm wraps around me, pulling me out of my thoughts and back into reality. i look over and see rodrick crouched down next to me, his eyebrows knit together, worried.

"hi." i squeak, trying to hold back the tears.

he sits crossed legged next to me. "tate, what's going on?"

i breathe deeply, trying to calm myself so i can get the words out.

"kat ended things." i manage to get out before my eyes release the tears. he pulls me into his arms as i sniffle.

"im so sorry, love." he whispers, rubbing my back comfortingly.

we stay like this for a while. i cry into his chest, while we sit on the sidewalk. although this is probably slightly embarrassing for him, he stays. he lets me cry it all out. why is he so nice to me? what did i ever do to deserve a friend this loyal and compassionate? i've never been there for him like this. how is it fair that i get to come to him for anything and not vice versa?

when my sobbing finally dies down, he whispers to me. "do you wanna go get milkshakes?"

i can't help but chuckle at his suggestion. "yeah, i do." i pull away, making eye contact with him, but breaking it immediately as i feel a pang of shame for dumping all my problems on him.

"hey, tate?" rodrick asks as we walk to his van.

i inhale. "yeah?"

"why do you do that?" he questions, his eyebrows furrowed.

"do what?" i ask, stepping into the van, although i know exactly what he's referring to.

"look away when im looking at you, like-" he struggles to find the right words. "-like you're embarrassed?"

well, that's one way of wording it.

"i just.." i sigh. "..i feel guilty, making you take care of me like this."

he turns to look at me from the driver's seat.  "what are you talking about? you're not making me do anything. i want to make you feel better. there's nothing wrong with that."

he seems almost annoyed with me. why can't i just shut up? i sink into the seat, my eyes brimming with tears. i stay silent for the rest of the ride, hoping my tears will stop by the time we get there.  rodrick blares heavy metal, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel rhythmically. when we get to the cafe, rodrick shuts the music off and turns to look at me.

"did i hurt your feelings?" he bites his lip nervously, anticipating my answer.

i take a shaky breath. "you didn't mean to. i'm just really sensitive right now."

"of course you are, i shouldn't have been so rough with you," he takes my hand, his eyes searching mine. "im sorry. can you forgive me?"

my heart skips a beat. he's so damn charming all the time.

"yes." i breathe. he smiles crookedly, and his face slowly starts to lean in to reach mine. my heart pounds and my eyes flutter shut as i wait for our lips to touch. i hear him snicker and open my eyes, glaring at him. he pecks me on the cheek and opens his door. although he didn't ever actually kiss me, my heart is beating out of my chest.

he comes around to open my door for me. just like the first time we went to get milkshakes.

"you okay?" he smirks. "you look a little red."