Pokemon Ranger: Savior

Chapter Thirteen: Reflections

     "Oh, yeah probably not. Did he do anything noteworthy?" I really like how every expression or question this man asks me is genuine and he's not just pulling my leg for laughs. 

     "My dad couldn't tell me any stories really from his time there. He died when I was around five."

     "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. I'm sure he was an admirable Ranger." He put down his fork here in honor. I nodded so he could keep eating.

     "Thanks. My mother told me a few of the things he told her, but it wasn't like superhero quality. And before you ask, I didn't feel a calling or anything to be a Ranger because of him."

     "I wasn't going to ask, but now I want to. You can't interest me about something and then not tell me." Chuckling, he stares at me expectantly. "Why did you want to become a Ranger so bad? Those letters were amazing and filled with passion." I forgot he memorized some of my lines. I really inspired him and I felt pride again.

     "It was more like inspiration from watching you and Joel on TV, among others. I've done more than one thing in my life so far, and I like to pursue as many passions as I can and conquer them all! My journeys as a Trainer are far from over..." I pause here and suppress the negative feelings. "But I've also done Coordinating and was awesome at that. I was reigning Champ when I left Sinnoh."

     "That's impressive. What is Coordinating exactly?" My famous look of incredulity has made its epic return. He splutters when he sees it, like he was afraid of me for a second. "Seriously, I've never really heard of it."

     "Haha! Well, it's like a set of Contests with Pokemon. The judges gauge your ability to showcase your Pokemon's talents in different categories. Your bond with your Pokemon is the key to winning. I won ribbons in all categories and difficulties in Sinnoh, and I only need two more in Hoenn."

     "I am genuinely impressed. What kept you from those last two ribbons?" 

     "Well, a certain problem presented itself and I was distracted. By the time I was finished I had more important matters to attend to. I'll go back and secure my wins one day." Good save. The adventures I went through are amazing stories, but not for a casual dinner.

     "I'm pretty sure you will, and it will be easy. You seem to excel at everything you try." I don't know why but I actually blush at this. He's definitely right. I achieve all of my goals, except one. My facial expression must've changed as I thought that, for Spenser changed his too. "Serena? What's wrong?"

     "I just keep thinking about negatives and doubts. I came here for multiple reasons, one of which, an underlying and hard truth, is recuperation." It hasn't been very long, but I think I'm about to open up and bare my soul to this person. Maybe.

     "Recuperation? From what? Did something happen to you? Are you hurt?" He looked alarmed, and I shook my head.

     "No, no. I wasn't hurt and I'm fine." He relaxed thankfully, but he was still expecting elaboration. I took a deep breath, steeled my nerves, and mentally prepared for this torture of remembering. "I am a Champion. In Sinnoh, in Hoenn, and in Kanto. I traveled to many places, saw many things, and tackled many grandiose adventures and challenges. I got very cocky, and that was my mistake."

     I paused, unsure if I should continue or of how much I should reveal. There's a lot of shame here, and I'm not privy to show certain things. I looked up at Spenser and he was sitting patiently, no longer eating, calm resolve and kind eyes on me. "It's ok, Serena. Whatever it is, you can trust me with it." And I believed him.

     Looking back down at the table I continued. "I got all my Gym Badges in Johto. I rose through the ranks very fast over there too. I breezed through the Elite Four. However, the Champion, Lance, was too strong, and I was unprepared. Losing wasn't something I was used to, but I resolved to keep trying and never give up. But I kept losing. I got frustrated, and I got angry at my own team, and I pushed my Pokemon really hard. In retrospect, I know that my frustration nurtured the defeats, but at the time it really hurt.