Lie To Me (Frerard)

10: In Which Frank's Dog Causes Gerard To Become A Devout Catholic

"I'm gay." The words fell from his lips unintentionally and as a result, Frank threw his hand over his lips, almost jumping at what he never meant to confess. "Fuck..." He exhaled in response, pulling his gaze away from Mikey's and trying not to think about how his older brother had been sat just there, just the other day, and how things had just fucked themselves over from then on.

Because what Gerard had said had fucking fucked him over, and maybe he wanted just to admit how he felt and be a fucking faggot with Gerard Way, but he didn't quite have the guts to do it, and maybe he was quite happy to just postpone it a little longer.

"It feels so weird to say it aloud, and I didn't- I didn't mean to, and I didn't mean to be like this, and I- I just am... and everything makes so much fucking sense now, but just not in the way that I want it to be, because I don't want to be some fucking faggot, and I-.... but, I'm so fucking gay, Mikey. It's so fucking obvious now."

"Well, with what you said to me previously, I'd already gathered that." Mikey exhaled with a small, but somehow reassuring smile. "And Frank, you're not just a 'faggot', okay? You're my friend, and it doesn't matter who you're attracted to at all." But Frank couldn't help but reckon that 'even my brother' wasn't quite part of that.

"Yesterday was just me freaking out because I had some stupid crush and now this is me getting assfucked and loving it, and then me freaking out until I've cleared out everything that's stopped me admitting the truth and now it's just a matter of joining the dots, because I want a relationship and I want to be loved and shit, but just not by a girl, and I've never felt that way about girls, so it was just fucking, and I thought that was okay, and I thought that I was just an asshole. But now, this is me admitting everything, and this is me making sense of it all, and I kind of want to accept this, and I want to let this be who I am, but who I am is just who I can't be."

"Frank, what on earth's stopping you being you?" Mikey sighed out, getting up and checking the time. "I've got to go - will you be alright?"

"Nothing's stopping me but myself, but I'm doing so for a far too good reason- look, just leave it... I didn't mean to 'come out' like this, I need fuck another girl, and I need to fuck one I care about because maybe I'm just confused and maybe that's all this is-"

"Frank..." Mikey sighed out, shaking his head. "That is most certainly not going to work, Gerard-"

"I don't fucking care about what Gerard did and didn't do. I need to talk to someone, anyway, I'm going out too."

"What you mean by that is that you need to fuck some random girl, huh?" And Mikey knew that he wasn't fucking wrong here.

"No, Gee, is my friend - I trust her, she gets me. She's not just some random girl, okay?"

And with Mikey thrown back into a sickening silence, Frank made his way down to the skate park, on a beeline to ruin his life, basically.

-

"Lindsey, you know what? You were absolutely right - Frank Iero is the worse fucking idea I've ever had." Of course, Gerard only seemed to understand her point when it was far too late and he was sat on Lindsey's kitchen floor, wide eyed and with an empty beer can balanced dangerously on his head.

"Finally, you fucking get it." She sighed out, shaking her head at her tipsy mess of a best friend, who really did appear to be having some kind of mental breakdown right now. "Gerard, come on-" She took the beer can from where it was balanced on his head and threw it in the trash, only for the seventeen year to cut him off.

"When's Alicia coming over? I need to talk to someone who isn't being a bitch about this." Of course, tipsy Gerard didn't quite understand what kind of effect his words would have; fortunately, Lindsey was well accustomed to this, and only laughed it off, rolling her eyes and sitting down beside him.