His Woeful Stare | Sixth of Ace: Xeidrine ✓

Final Stare

Bago pa nila ako makita roon ay dali-dali akong tumakbo pabalik ng hotel. Kahit ilang buwan na ang lumipas, masakit pa rin.

Akala ko noong una ay natatanggap ko na sa sarili kong wala na kami. Wala nang pag-asang maging kami ngunit hindi pala.

Ang hirap palang tanggapin ng katotohanan...

Napahinto ako sa pagtakbo ng malapit na ako sa hotel. Mayroon akong nabanggang tao. Itinaas ko ang aking ulo at nakita ko ang pigura ni Sike.

"You're crying again," he said with a concern tone

"Sike..."

He hugged me and I let my tears fell down. Bumalik na naman ang sakit na dulot ni Nash makalipas ang pitong taon. 

Akala ko ay naka-move on na ako. Akala ko ay magaling na ang puso ko, hindi pa pala.

Hinayaan lamang niya akong umiyak sa kaniyang balikat na parang bata. Nanatili siyang walang imik.

Ngayong nasa bisig niya ako, para bang naiibsan ang pighating aking nararamdaman. Sa bawat haplos ng kami ni Sike sa aking likod, ako'y kumakalma.

Nanatili kami sa ganoong posisyon ng ilang minuto. Nang mapagod ang aking mga luha sa kakatutlo, tumingin ako ka Sike.

Mababakas mo sa kaniyang abong mga mata ang pag-aalala. At dahil din sa mga ito, naalala ko na naman si Nash. They have both gray eyes.

"S-Sike..." I called him once again.

"Do you know when the first time I saw you... You remind me of Nash..." I said out of the blue.

I reminisce about the moment when we're in our first year of college. How funny that time I was brokenhearted with Nash. Just like today...

"You have both the same outfit, loves wearing long sleeves, and of course, you have both the same gray eyes..."

I chuckled bitterly. I don't know why I'm saying this to him.

"But the difference between you and Nash, y-you didn't hurt my feelings..."

My tears fell down again. Taksil na mga luha. Akala ko ay pagod na sila ngunit hindi pa pala. Niyakap akong muli ni Sike.

"Just cry. I'm just here by your side," he sincerely said.

Yinakap niya ako nang mahigpit. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng init at kauntin kaginhawaan dahil sa kaniya. Ilang segundo ang lumipas, kumalas siya ng pagkakayakap at tumingin sa akin ng deretso.

"I'm sorry to say this Xei, but Nash is a jerk." He frankly uttered. "You don't deserve him... You deserve someone that will love you... Someone who's has an act of courage to fight for you. A man that is better with him," he added.

When I hear those words from Sike, I guess he's right. Nash was not the man that was for me.

Ang kailangan ko na lang gawin ay mag-move on at tanggapin itong lahat na hindi talaga kami itinadhana.

"Alam kong masakit pa rin sa iyo ang lahat ng ito pero..." he paused for a while and sincerely looked at me. "Xeidrine, I can be that man if you'll let me."

My heart trembles. I did not expect that he will be going to say that. Sike held my hand and waiting for my answer.

"S---Sike..."

I hear him took a deep sighed. "You don't have to answer for now. I can wait, but always remember I am always by your side. I won't leave you."

Hindi pa rin maproseso ng aking utak ang mga nangyayari. Pero nang marinig ko ang mga salitang ito kay Sike, nakaramdam ako ng kakaiba.

Should I let go of the past and think about my present and future?

But I cannot decide now. My brain is a mess. This confession of my friend, plus what I've witnessed earlier gives me exhaustion.

"Give me time Sike... I just need to heal my heart..."

He smiled at me and pat my head. "I respect your decision."

I took a deep sighed. Sana ay tama itong gagawin ko.

"But I hope I will do it with you..."

After I stated that, Sike's jaw dropped. I cannot blame if that's his reaction. Pati ako hindi makapaniwala sa sinabi ko. Marahil ay gusto ko na talagang kalimutan siya.

Hindi ko na hintay si Sike na makasagot. I give him a pecked kiss. At dito ko uumpisahan ang aking paghilom.

Balang araw ay matatanggap ko rin ang lahat ng ito...

Alam kong iisipin na iba na mali ang gagawin ko. Na gagawin kong panakip butas si Sike sa lahat ng sakit, ngunit nagkakamali sila.

Mayroon talagang mga taong dadating lamang sa ating buhay at bibigyan tayo ng aral. Pero sa bandang huli ay sasaktan at iiwan din nila tayo. 

Hindi porket nagmamahalan kayo, mananatili ang inyong relasyon habang buhay. Minsan, kailangan din nating pairalin ang ating utak, hindi lamang ang ating puso.

Nash and I were like in the game of chess. We are the king and queen when the game started, but unexpectedly, I've lost in his life. As a result, a pawn took over my position and became her new queen— that is Micaiah.

I thought Nash was destined for me, but I just turned his woeful stare into a wonderful one, temporarily...

I waited for him for seven years, then he came back— not to be with me, but just to have closure.

Love is really complicated...

It gaves me happiness, joy, and at the same time, sadness, and pain.

In the love story of Romeo and Juliet, I'm just Rosaline. I'm just the girl that Romeo loves for once.

And in the story of Titanic, I'm not the Rose of Jack.

These two love stories both end tragically Even if I didn't experience their story, but I also have a tragic one.

I gave Nash all my love and luck

Even though he did not give it back

My life turns into a woeful one

Nash made me feel like a hopeless human...

I'm Architect Alexeidrine Praise Monteasul and this is my woeful story...

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : - ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ - : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Somehow edited. There are still errors and incorrect words. Please bear with me.

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