Breakout Rooms (#4)

w i f i

"Remember when the Titanic was sinking and the band continued to play? Well, we're the band." – The Pantiles

Dedication: IamSongforsomeone for being an amazingly supportive reader! Thank you so much for interacting with my comments :)

■ □ ■ □ ■ □ ■ □

"Well, fancy seeing you again, Pomegranate."

"Oh geez, you again?"

"Wow, you look beautiful today! The black rectangle brings out your eyes."

"How did we end up in the same breakout room again?"

"One may call it fate, another may call it destiny, but I call it a coincidence."

"Well, I call it misfortune, Space Jam."

"Wow, you're really going all out with the hostility today. I thought we were getting along well last time, no?"

"Look, I was under the impression that it was a one-off thing. I was hoping to mysteriously vanish so you'd be left behind, staring longingly at my silhouette."

"You sure you're a philosophy major? You could take up creative writing with that kind of linguistic prowess."

"I'm a classics major, so both are wrong. I'm giving you an F for this, tut tut."

"Press F to pay respects to my GPA. That 3.8 was nice while it lasted."

"Damn, 3.8? Color me impressed."

"I'm not as much of a dumbass as you seem to think I am, you know."

"Oi, I never said that! You're academically talented and witty to boot. You've earned my grudging respect, Space Jam."

"Oho, it seems that you've finally warmed up to me. Where's the ring? Should we save the date?"

"Not so fast, dude. I'm learning to tolerate you, not wed and bed you."

"Well, as long as you don't behead me, I'm going to assume that we're cool."

"Guillotines are off the table. For now."

"Aw, you are warming up! Dearest Persephone, are you ready to leave winter behind and enter spring?

"Nice try. I'm lukewarm at best."

"Well, it's March now, so it's spring. There's no escaping your fate!"

"Ah, but you forget one glaring detail. I'm Australian. It's autumn there."

"Yeah, but you're in the US, right?"

"...It's autumn in my heart."

"Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night. Also, do you sleep upside down like a bat? You know, down under?"

"I'm so tempted to reach through this screen and strangle you."

"Ooh, kinky!"

"If you find that sexy, you'll love my guillotine and the way it separates your head from your body. It's back on the table, Space Jam."

"Well, consider me scared and horny."

"Ah, yes, my constant state of being."

"I'm choosing to ignore that, but I do have a genuine question about you being Australian."

"If you're going to ask whether I've met Hugh Jackman, the answer is no, but god, I wish."

"That's not my question, but honestly, that's a mood. Anyway, I was going to ask if you're an exchange student."

"Yep, I'm only here for one semester. I was planning on making the most of New York, but then the pandemic started and–"

"Oh, hold on, breakout rooms are closing in 30 seconds. Crap, I want to hear the rest of your story!"

"Wait, you have a phone, right?"

"Yeah, of course I have one! What, you think I'm still living in the 1950s?"

"There, I've sent you my phone number through the chat. Take it or leave it."

"..."

"Whoa, you already added my number and sent me a text? It's been ten seconds!"

"I'm a speedy typer, baby. Not the only thing these fingers are useful for, by the way. If you get my drift."

"Alright, you've taken horny to a whole other level. Chill out, horndog."

"Hey, sue me for making the most of my time before being forced back into the main Zoom session."

"Well, adiós, partner! It's been a displeasure."

"Same to you, partner."