Phan one shots

Folder File Named 'Phil'

Hey dudes!

I'm sorry I won't call you that anymore.

Anyways I've been a bit busy with my new story Cat and Dog (have you read it yet?) but here you go.

I was writing this at 4 in morning so I don't know if it's good or not. I didn't bother to edit it. Warnings~ self harm, cheating, mentions of sex (when don't my stories mention sex)

"You're the worst person in the world." He meant it jokingly, put it still stabbed at my heart.

We were playing Sims 4 for our gaming channel and I made our character, Dil, flirt with another person. I wanted Dil to find love life and Dan hated it. He yelled that and it hurt.

I was in love with Dan. Have been for so long. I understand why he doesn't like me. I mean, look at me.

I'm ugly.

After filming I tell Dan that I'm skipping dinner, telling him I'm not hungry. I go into my bedroom, making sure to lock it first and go to my mirror.

They say to look in the mirror everyday and say something you like about yourself. I do that, but I say a thing I hate about myself.

My skin is a horrible pale.

My body is awkwardly shaped. So is my head.

My eyes.

My mouth.

My stomach.

My hands.

My feet.

Everything.

I sigh. I'll never be good enough for anyone.

I go to sleep with stinging wrists and puffy eyes.

I've been getting back into my cutting habit. When I first 'recovered' I thought that I wouldn't need it anymore. Turns out I was wrong. I was really wrong. It's not like I want to die, I just deserve the pain.

Dan was having some of our friends over. Don't know why but he was forcing me to come out. I put on my 'Pugs not Drugs' jumper and went to the lounge. "Why are you wearing a jumper? It's warm in here." "I was cold." "Not getting sick, are you?" I shrugged.

It was awkward in the morning, which barely happen anymore. It hurt. The doorbell rang and Dan went to go get it. I heard voices, immediately recognizing a few. "Phil! It's so nice to see you!" I heard Zoe's voice yell.

I faked a smile and hugged her. "I miss that Phil hug." She said, laughing afterwards. I fake another smile. "I brought wine." PJ said. "I'll go grab glasses." I say quietly, sneaking my way pass and go into the kitchen.

I looked over, made sure nobody was looking and reached up to grab wine glasses. My sleeve slid up, revealing red slashes, that's why I checked to see if anyone was watching. "Phil!" I jumped and quickly lowered my arm.

It was PJ. He walked over to me and moved my sleeve down, revealing my pain. He gasped quietly. "P-Phil, what's been going on?" I bowed my head. "I don't want to talk about it."

"You need to get help." I pushed him away. "I don't want help." I whisper yelled. "Phil. You need help. Why are doing this?" "Because I hate myself and I'm in love with someone that would never love me." "Who?" He gently tucked my fringe behind my ear and I leaned into the tough. "Dan." I mumbled quietly.

He laughed. "I know. He'd never like me back." I said as my heart crumbled. "No. It's just, he loves you too. You both are so oblivious to the affection you have for each other." "H-he loves me?" PJ nodded.