Lunacy and Other Fairytales ; tk | ym

10.

A few moments pass, then an elderly woman appears, hectically turning around the corner. She spots Taehyung, then looks back at the man, clearly confused.

"He's looking for a job," the man tells her, voice rough. Taehyung's cheeks hurt from smiling.

"A job?" the lady asks, then her face lights up, "Oh, how wonderful!"

She urges Taehyung to sit down at one of the tables, then she follows him with two papers in her hand. Turns out that they've been looking for staff for a while now — she and her husband are both old already — but no one who isn't a regular ever really passes the pub. She isn't bothered by Taehyung's lack of experience when it comes to gastronomy; it's easy, she promises him, and he will learn fast. The pay is not too bad, either; neither is it perfect, but it's something.

Hopefully, Jeongguk will be proud.

When he entered the pub, he did not expect to immediately be offered a job, but when Taehyung leaves and makes his way back home, he is holding a registration in his hands. Now, the smile on his lips feels more genuine than ever.

Once he is home again, he puts the registration on the table. His eyes fall on his laptop; for a while, he forgot about the email he wrote this morning, but now it comes back to him. He moves the mouse and the laptop lights up.

There is a new email. He sent his to both Hoseok's and Namjoon's email addresses, but this one was just sent by Namjoon. He opens it.

Taehyung-ssi, it says,

We're willing to answer any questions you have. Would you like to meet up tomorrow around 4pm at Hangang Park? Text me if it's alright with you: xxx-xxxx-xxx.

Kim Namjoon

Taehyung quickly grabs his phone, saves the number. He thinks for a moment before he actually texts Namjoon; he still hasn't talked to Jeongguk about this. How was he supposed to? But still, it feels wrong.

He has to talk to him, tonight. Not only about the meeting; about everything. God, he misses him already.

Hello Namjoon-ssi, this is Taehyung. Tomorrow sounds good. See you at Hangang Park.

It's only early in the afternoon and Taehyung has more time to kill. Perhaps taking care of the household will busy him for a while. He has nothing else to do, anyway.

The only good thing about Taehyung being home all the time is that the apartment is usually quite clean and tidy. He vacuums although he doesn't have to, cleans the kitchen and the bathroom. When the afternoon shifts into evening, he sits on the bedroom floor and does the laundry. His thoughts are with Jeongguk as they always are; he knows the younger must be home any minute, and it's making him more nervous than he expected. He prepared what he wants to say a million times now, over and over again, but nothing seems right.

Hey, Jeongguk. I'm sorry for lying about seeing Jimin. He told me he wanted to apologize and I wanted to hear him out. I didn't tell you because I was scared you were going to get mad at me and try to stop me. My plan was to tell Jimin that I won't write the book but that didn't work out. I just couldn't tell him. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

It's the truth, but it doesn't feel like enough. Taehyung sits still for a moment, one of Jeongguk's shirts in his hands, and presses it against his chest with a sigh. The familiar, comforting scent of cologne and sweat and Jeongguk fills his nostrils.

He loves him, he loves him so much, and he is scared of losing him. Even more than that, though, he doesn't want to keep hurting Jeongguk. He knows that fights are inevitable, has never been naive enough to believe that they are, but recently the two of them don't seem to be able to get along for more than a couple of days at a time. And it's all Taehyung's fault — at least it feels like that.