The backup Bride

Episode 30

I walked in behind her.

The room had white coloured walls, it also had a huge French window facing a balcony. She had a row of succulents and cactus near the window.

Aparna walked to the window and opened it. The balcony had a small seating area and it was covered with plants.

" Wow! Your room is so lit! " I said.

" Thank you! " She said and closed the window.

As I took a step back, I heard glass creaking from underneath my feet.I had stepped on some photo.

I bent down and picked up the frame. It was a photo of Aparna with a boy, must be in her school days. They both were laughing at something. They both were wearing geeky spectacles. The boy had greyish tint on his eyes.

Aparna quickly snatched the photo from my hands and tore it into pieces. She picked up the frame and threw it into the dustbin at one corner.

She cursed and then threw away the pieces of the photo.

" I thought they had cleaned it, I should have burnt it" She said and paused midway.

I caught her hand and pulled her.

" Who was that? " I asked confused.

" Someone you need not know about. " She said.

" Was that your crush that you talked about, the boy in your school ? " I asked incidentally.

She blinked at me and nodded her head.

" So,You don't like him now? " I asked smiling.

She smiled at me shaking her head,and dragged me out of her room.

The guest room was also as big as her room. As soon as Aparna left, I fell on the bed and slept like dead log.

It was a bad dream again. I was at my native village and I am walking towards my grandpa's house. The streets are empty. It was close to dusk.

As I walked closer to the house, I heard wailing sound of a woman.

I rushed inside the house, to find my athai( aunt ) and my amma crying over someone. I slowly took a step closer and the person laying down was Anjali, she looked like she was dead.

Suddenly, my Uncle from no where pounced on me and caught my shirt.

" You killed her! " He shouted at me crying.

" No! I didn't " I shouted back.

He pushed to me the wall and started punching my face.

I felt someone shaking me and woke up startled. I was completely covered in sweat.

Aparna was looking at me shocked. All the lights were turned on. It took few minutes for me to come back to my consciousness.

" Heard you shouting, bad dream huh?" Aparna asked after handing me a glass of water.

I nodded and gulped the entire glass of water.

She waited for my reply but I wasn't ready to talk about that again.

" Let's eat something, come " She said and walked out of the room.

I followed her downstairs silently.

She reheated the food and served it in the dining table. I was still shaking from the dream.

We ate silently and Aparna understood that I need some space.

After eating, I finally asked her.

" Can someone ever suicide because they couldn't marry the person they liked? " I asked her as she sat back on her chair.

She looked at me confused for a moment and then finally she got what I was talking about.

"Yes, they can. For two reasons " She said.

" What are they? " I asked.

" Either they really loved the person true to their heart that they can't bear letting go of their love. Or, they really don't feel like living in the life they are living now and see the other person as their only hope into a life that they want. "She said.

" But if you love someone true to your heart, won't their happiness be your priority? " I asked.

" Love can be selfish too Shiva. Sometimes,I think it is not wrong to be selfish in love. " She said.

" Maybe, but if love is selfish, then is it really true? , if your love is based on that person being with you or if it is based on their decisions , then don't you think, love looses it's meaning itself ?. " I said.

Aparna looked at me with wide eyes.

" Love should be loving the person the way they are. If you want them to be under your control, what is it really?,if you want them trapped in your cage,is it love?" I asked.

" Look Shiva, we don't know what Anjali is going through or went through. Her past which might have made her do certain things, her fears or anything. We don't know. " Aparna said.

" No, I wasn't talking about Anjali. I was talking about me. What if I suicide? " I asked.