Just Ellie ⌁ Draco Malfoy (ON HOLD)

44

Your father's in Azkaban, what worse could happen to him while he's in there? Ellie wanted to say.

There were so many thoughts and emotions swirling through Ellie's mind and body that it was hard for her to even concentrate... hard for a simple clear thought, a simple clear decision. A simple sentence, even. She stammered for a moment, sighed, and stood from the steps, followed by Draco, who still watched her with fear and concern. 

"I understand what you're saying but, come on," Ellie scoffed softly, her disappointment causing her heartbeat to pick up. "Please don't tell me this was all for nothing. It's got to be unheard of for a Hogwarts student to have a Dark Mark, Draco, what if he's got it now? Dumbledore so wouldn't allow Nikolai to attend here anymore if he has the mark. Look at the date it was written. Look -- that's before we even started sixth-year -- August -- 'I'll get that tattoo inked into my arm as soon as I--"

"I know what it says!" Draco grunted, turning his back to her and walking a couple steps forward, his hand raised to his mouth. 

Ellie suddenly grew agitated and stalked up to him, even so as he had his back to her.  

"I understand this might be scary for you, Malfoy, but I have to marry him!" she snapped at him. He turned around and watched her with narrowed eyes. "Me! I'll have to be alone with him, behind closed doors...it frightens me to think of what could happen in those moments, so excuse me if I want--"

"If you want to do things like tell Dumbledore?" Draco poked at her mockingly. Ellie could feel her shoulders sag with hopelessness. "He can't help! Use your brain, what can he do? Send the journal to the Ministry, have them scan over it... oh, it's just a little boys journal he'll grow out of whatever he's going on about. No evidence here. He can have his journal back, Dumbledore, that was pointless."

"You make me feel so hopeless, Draco..." Ellie whispered.

"Well, you have no idea how hopeless you make me feel," replied Draco, in a simple voice. He dropped the sour look on his face and sighed. "You're wrong and you know it."

"What?"

"You don't have to marry him. You don't have to be alone with him. Your parents have probably just been trying to scare you into thinking you've got no choice but to go through with it, but you'll be of age at that point and free to do as you like. This is all stupid, Ellie. And for the last year, maybe you've just been overthinking all of this and scaring yourself as well."

Ellie shook her head and looked down, doing exactly what Draco said she was probably doing for the last year: overthink. "And what if you're wrong? I'm not gonna just sit back and do nothing if there's a chance that it is real and I do have to."

"Tell me, what's everyone gonna do when you say no? Drag you out of bed, shove you in your pretty white dress and somehow force you to say I do?" 

Ellie vividly remembered Silas saying something similar to this. 

"Please stop..." Ellie said quietly. "This is giving me a headache."

Draco seemed to realise that all of what he was saying was making the redhead feel lost with no direction to go thereafter. He sighed and, though clearly reluctantly, said, "I'm sorry."

It was clear he had a ton more to say about the matter. 

Ellie's mind began to feel numb yet fuzzy at the same time and she could feel her hands begin to shake. The beating of her heart had picked up so much by now that it felt abnormal, like her heart would soon beat so hard that it would poke out of her chest... Her chest, oh it hurt so, so bad. Were these palpitations? And was it normal to sweat this much just by standing still in a cool evening?

Ellie felt Draco's hand swipe at hers before it grabbed it and tugged, and he was saying her name questioningly, but she couldn't even focus on that. She had never experienced any feeling like this before... never had to breathe so loud and hard because she feared she wouldn't be able to soon. 

"Come on, Ellie, let's take a short walk around the tower," Draco said softly, gently pulling on her hand. He lingered it over hers for a moment after pulling it, and Ellie gripped it, which made him grip her hand back. "And keep taking deep breaths maybe..."

Even through Ellie's intense fear, and intense emotions, and intense everything, she could tell that Draco had no idea what he was doing, but obviously hoped that he was doing something right... or did he know? 

Ellie's shortness of breath kept her feeling as though she was struggling to intake air the more she exhaled. "I think I'm having a panic attack... Please take me back to my dorm."

"I realise that," Draco responded, his voice shaky. "Is it okay to --"

Draco cut himself off for a moment and gestured with his free arm, silently asking her if it was alright to hug her. Ellie didn't say anything, just stood there breathing in deep and slow, feeling her heart slow a little, before walking into Draco's embrace and feeling his arms wrap around her, rubbing her back. 

Ellie didn't think it would help at all. A hug seemed like it would've made her feel trapped with no way to breathe. But her fear disappeared in the span of a couple seconds.

"Tell you what," Draco started, his arms still wrapped around Ellie, and hers wrapped around him. "We'll think on what to do... alright?"

Ellie nodded, feeling herself tremble slightly. 

"In the meantime, this journal needs to go back where it was before."

Ellie nodded again.

"I can't just protect you forever, you know?" Draco whispered into Ellie's hair.

"Don't worry about that. It's Nikolai who needs protecting."