Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got

Chapter 07

a.n:

I made a conscious decision in regards to Waverly in this chapter. I realised that whilst she would be struggling when coming back from the garden, she is still Waverly Earp. I didn't want to make her weak or passive in the final resolution of the garden, realistically Waverly is smart and driven and brave and she would want to help and not just sit by.

I hope that somewhat explains the direction this chapter is taken in. Obviously she's not 'back to normal' whatever that even means, but she also isn't entirely useless or weak either. It's a journey and the struggles will still be addressed.

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in this chapter...

Waverly has an important conversation with her sister.
Nicole and Waverly go to see Valdez.
Jeremy and Robin make a scary and cruel realisation.

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A week had passed since they had opened the garden and gotten Waverly back, but little had changed. That first evening Nicole had found Waverly with very minimal difficulty; the small girl hadn't gone any further than the barn and Nicole had heard the soft crying almost instantly. They hadn't spoken at all that night; Nicole had just taken her upstairs and put her to bed, staying when Waverly hadn't let go of her arm.

Since then, Nicole had been sleeping on the couch in the homestead. They had tried sleeping in the same bed that first night, but Waverly had woken up in the middle of the night, freaking out and Nicole had ended up in a bundle on the floor. Ever since then, Waverly had been even more protective about intimacy. It felt like they'd taken ten steps back and Waverly would only kiss her cheek now.

Nightmares were haunting Waverly, but she hid them from Nicole. All of them had been about loosing Nicole or Wynonna and it had always been her fault. The garden had ripped open the scars which jolene had burned into her skin when she had whispered with her sharp tongue and cutting words into her ear. Everyday she had cursed herself for not sharing them with Nicole, her other half, because that's what she was, the other half keeping her balanced, grounded, strong and safe. But Nicole's balance and grounding had been slipping recently, and Waverly was scared to push her further, to send her toppling over. She had so much going on at the moment and Waverly was selfless, everyone else came before her in the hierarchy of her own mind. She felt an uncomfortable guilt, a feeling of selfishness for hiding it her feelings, even if it was for the best. She knew Nicole had shared everything with her, but she was only hiding it to protect her, right? She felt even more guilty that a part of the reason she didn't want to tell Nicole is because she couldn't handle it if Nicole lost her balance, it would uproot the security Waverly needed, so she was selfish in needing Nicole to be strong now, for her.

This morning was no different, as Waverly rounded the corner from the stairs, her entire body covered by a huge fluffy dressing gown, she could already hear Wynonna stomping around the kitchen, angrily making breakfast. To her right she could see the redhead with her head in her hands, clearly having been woken up by the noise.

"Wynonna?" The smell of burnt toast caused her to wrinkle up her nose, but she smiled softly anyway. Only her sister could burn toast every single time.

"Huh? Oh hey babygirl - there's more bread over there, I've gotta jet to the station. I asked Jeremy to run some tests on the soil under the stairs and they've come back! I'll be back this evening! See ya." A piece of unbuttered, plain toast hung from her mouth as she pulled her jacket on and hurried out of the door before Waverly even had a chance to reply.

Waverly watched with wide eyes and her jaw dropped and she doesn't hear Nicole shuffle into the kitchen behind her.

"Waves?"