Despite the unshakable attraction between them, Maeve and Lucian are uninterested in love and marriage; especially since they hate one another and couldn't think of a worse match.
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London, 1815
Maeve Langston's aversion to the opposite sex has...
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Maeve was hopping up and down with impatience. Today, her brothers were coming back from their board school, and it would be the first time she would see them since Christmas. Cameron was tall and broad with too much black hair on his head, and a smile that was already breaking hearts, while Manning was a lanky boy with blond hair and a charming shyness.
She hadn't realized how much she had missed them until now, and she was excited about their upcoming visit. Having her brothers here would surely compensate for her lack of relations with her sister. She was sitting in her room, a book in hand, but had been stuck on the same page for over half an hour now. She kept looking at her clock, wishing time would pass faster.
It was clear her sudden involvement with her brother's arrival was a semi-conscious way to avoid thinking too much about Lucian. It annoyed her to notice that the more she tried to not think of him, the more often he popped into her mind.
The other night, at the Schwarzes', she had experienced the most satisfying, the most delicious sensations she'd ever felt. Against that wall, he had pleased her to a point she would have never thought possible, bringing more pleasure than her brain could have ever fathomed. Afterward, she had been in a cloudy state of satisfaction, feeling relaxed and content.
Back at the Schwarz house, he had almost robbed her of her decision to let go. She had been a puppet in his hands, manipulated by the pleasure he had given her. However, she couldn't help but think he could have taken her right there in the study and she wouldn't have complained, but he had held back. He'd given her what she wanted, without taking what she had offered so shamelessly. She was grateful he hadn't, but she couldn't help but wonder what it meant. To the best of her knowledge, men made it a sport to debauch women, but Lucian hadn't seemed to be looking forward to that.
At the moment, when she had accepted his request and told him she would wait for him to come back, she hadn't cared about the consequences. That was because she hadn't been able to think back then, and now that she wasn't near him, far from his influence and his mesmerizing green eyes, she saw dozens of reasons not to let this happen. Such as, protecting her virtue, avoiding scandal, not getting her heartbroken, not getting pregnant, not getting thrown out of society...
It was clear her brain didn't function properly when he was around, and her body was attracted to him like a bee was to sugar. She didn't doubt that, as soon as she would be reunited with him, all of her resolutions would fade away in an instant, and she would end up begging him to take her, as she had in Mr. Schwarz's study. She didn't know how to deal with the fact that she turned into a wanton harlot with him, but she could console herself with the knowledge he didn't seem to mind. On the contrary.
She was aware that what was happening between them had nothing to do with Delawney anymore. It was about them, and about this thing they shared. Poor John Delawney was just a casualty, here at the wrong place and the wrong time.
Maeve tried not to think of the fact that Lucian was leaving in four days, and she doubted she would see him until then. Anyhow, wondering about all this was useless for now. She didn't even know for how long she would have to wait for him to come back. A year seemed like a lot, and she wondered if all those desires would still be there then. Maybe it would be for the better. He would come back, not wanting her, she wouldn't want him either, and life would go on.
