Silence Deep as the Snow » Sihtric || The Last Kingdom

Curiosity

"Were you born in Daneland?"

I needed to do something to break the silence as we walked.

"No," Sihtric scoffed, peeling an apple with his knife.

I wondered how many knives the man kept on his person, but was reluctant to ask such a question. "Well?"

"Well what, princess?" He chewed on a bite then offered me a piece.

I took the bite of apple from him. I didn't dare turn him down. The bittersweet flesh tickled the back of my throat as I struggled to keep up with his long gait. He subtly slowed a step.

"Where were you born then?"

"Here."

"Here... where here?"

Sihtric scoffed. "So curious. Were you like this as a child?"

"My mother wanted me to ask her questions. She raised me to seek knowledge."

"It sounds like she was a wise woman."

I nodded and bit my lip, unwilling to discuss my mother. "So where were you born?"

"Northumbria."

"... and your parents? Are they still living?" I asked as casually as possible.

Sihtric pulled his arm back and threw the apple core across the water. "I'm certain Tola and Ivar have already told you my tale. Neither of them know when to be still."

My face warmed, but I pressed on. "It's only because of what you said last night. About how I was right to leave a place where I was not wanted."

Sihtric stopped and glared up at the sky. It was a beautiful day. His gaze trailed across the river beside us, the banks still heavily pregnant from the days of rain. I waited for him to speak, digging into the decomposing leaves with the toe of my shoe. 

"This one will do."

I blinked up at him. "What?"

He was already striding towards a large oak with heavy branches. With a grunt, he hefted himself up onto the lower limbs. He climbed like a squirrel along the trunk, shaking loose the first golden leaves of fall over my head. He swiftly reached the canopy of the forest. 

"I see smoke to the west. Perhaps it is them!" He shouted from above.

I shielded my eyes as he made his way down. He didn't even get to the lowest branches before he leaped into the air. He landed in front of me and rose with the impish grin that seemed to define him. 

"You are more beast than man," I chuckled.

He lifted a hand towards me. I held my breath as he took a leaf from the crown of my head.

"I was known for it as a child in my father's house. He was a jarl, his fortress was well defended with towers and walls. I spent more of my childhood above solid ground than on it."

It was the most personal thing that he had said since I had met him. He shrugged at my surprised silence and strode down the riverside. I skipped a couple steps to catch up, holding my skirts to match my speed. 

"Jarl. That is like a Lord?"

"Something like that."

"Does that mean you might become a jarl someday?"

He sighed. "It doesn't work that way among Danes. Positions of power and authority are based more in fame and merit in battle than in birthright. Though an impressive lineage doesn't hurt."

"Sometimes, I think that is a better way to do things."

He gave me a critical look and I tried not to turn away. "That's a fine thing considering how comfortably you were raised."

"You were the son of a jarl."

"The bastard son of a Jarl. The rejected bastard of a Jarl. Very different."

"Perhaps. But you are also male. It's different for girls. Even when my father was at his best, the only thing I could bring him would be a treaty or gold through marriage." I hitched my skirts up higher to climb a mound of stone after him. "I was useless otherwise."

"One thing I have learned in the years since I abandoned my father's house; you should stop speaking of yourself in how you believe they saw you." Sihtric reached the other side of a sharp boulder and held his hand up towards me. "The woman I've known over just a short period of time is far from useless. You must stop seeing yourself as such if you are ever going to be free."

I took his hand and met his eyes. "Perhaps you are right."

"I know I am right."

"You are confident."

"I am that as well." The grin made another appearance.

I reached the other side of the rock with a soft laugh. As I walked ahead of him, I could feel his eyes on me. I wasn't sure how I felt about it, but I knew I didn't mind it.  

As the sun was fading behind the trees, casting a harsh shadow over the misting river, we stopped at a curve. He motioned towards the west where he had seen the smoke earlier.

"That is where the fire was earlier today. I am willing to leave the river to try and see if there is any sign of our party. Are you willing to follow?"

I was taken aback that he would ask my opinion. I gave a mute nod, pressing my lips together.

"Very well. If we do not find them, we will camp in the wood tonight. I do now know this area well, but we are almost to the place where the ferry used to be. I can get us to the main roads from there."

A sick dread settled in my stomach. I didn't want to think of Tola without her twin brother. We still didn't know if Ivar had survived the deluge or not. I followed behind Sihtric into the twilight and tried not to feel overwhelmed by what we might or might not find. 

No other campfires glowed through the gloom and it soon became too dark to see. Sihtric heaved a breath and silently collected an armful of dry wood. There was nothing to eat. I tried to ignore my empty stomach as he showed me how to light a campfire. 

Neither of us said anything as we settled in for the night much as we had the previous evening. I sensed that he felt as heartsick as me. I pressed my back to his and let the rhythmic lull of his breathing draw me to sleep.