Free Spirit

Fumi 1: Dreams and Nightmares

***

"You gonna what now, sweetie?" Mom asked as she stared at me with pure and utter confusion. I smiled proudly at her with two missing teeth, "Yeah, I'm gonna beat the shiite out of them when they sthart yelling at ussh again. And... and... uhh- I'm gonna make them pay, argghhhh hnnngghhhhh!!!"

I said the last sounds while making an angry face, the angriest I could muster out till I turned red. Mom just burst into laughter while watching my poor imitation of Dad, she even wiped a few tears that got out of the corner of her eyes.

"Ouh sweetie. And that's your idea of a superhero?" she asked with a smile. Her smile.

"Well, sho long assh I beat the bad guyssh and sshave you, then yeah. That'sh me being the shuperhero, the good guy who sholves crime and brings jushtiche and winsh the heart of the damhsel in dihstress!" As I did that, I stood up like I was Superman taking flight. Mom laughed at me even more when I did swooshing sounds while running around Nana's house and pretending to fly.

"I think you just mixed up what a cop and a prince would do in their story." But I wasn't really listening to what Mom was saying because I was looking for Dad's football and the nearest towel I could find. After tying it around my neck, I shouted, "Tadaa! I'm Shuper Tossh! With my truhsty football and amazhing kickss, I can beat anyone that disturbhhs peahce in the land!" All while posing with the football round my right arm and my left arm still in 'flight mode'.

"Not if you don't clean up after yourself will you be able to save people and fight crime! Did you or did you not clean your dishes after breakfast just now Damie?" shouted Nana from the kitchen.

'Uh-oh.'

I looked towards Mom and gave a sheepish smile indicating I did not washed my dishes just yet. Mom just gave me the 'better do it now or she'll beat your ass for it' look to me. "To the kitcshen!" then I 'flew' to my destination while still carrying the football.

I could guess that Mom just shook her head because her only child was a crackhead at the age of 8. Nearing the kitchen, I could hear Nana cutting up vegetables, yuck. So, I changed course towards the door to get to the lawn instead.

'The dishes could wait', I guessed. I placed the football next to the little gnome Nana had in front of the door in the house just before I turned the knob and got outside.

There, beauty always greeted me.

Clear blue skies which were void of clouds, the smell of Nana's daisies and roses and lavenders on the front porch, the sound of Dad fixing up the old Mercedes in the garage and the warmth on my skin coming from the afternoon April sun.

This was beauty, in it's true and natural form.

And I always seem to remember exactly this scene, maybe because it was the most beautiful and awe dropping moment anyone could've experienced. I guess it's the thought of pure innocence of a child that still does not know of the cruel world is what wrapped my mind around this memory.

Yeah, this is all a dream, it's just a replay of my memories.

***

I groaned loudly as I heard the buzzing coming from my desk, phone ringing my alarm telling me it's time to live again, and hopefully survive this new day. I groggily slumped my hand onto the nearby desk and search for my phone to swipe away the alarm. After cursing a few times into my pillow while in search of the device, I finally got a hold of it and turned over to my back then finally swiping the damn alarm away.

Why did I even have the alarm on for? I closed my eyes and took in a few deep breaths before realizing one thing: practice.

'Shit, I got practice. Practice!'