When The Stars Align

chapter forty | okay, okay?

She wanted to keep herself away. She didn't want to be touched. She's scared, she didn't trust people. And Victoria couldn't force this out of her sister, not until she's ready to talk. There was still a gap, despite the relationship they built over the last couple weeks.

"I also think Ansen Grey got her addicted to whatever was in her bloodstream," Lysander adds. Victoria looks at him like he was crazy.

She shook her head. "She's seventeen. There's no way."

"Vic, we know that her group was involved with a lot of drug heists," Lysander tried to reason. "Bad guys don't care about laws, they probably gave her whatever they wanted." Lysander fiddled with his ring again. "I saw him inject Vera with something. He offered her water and Vera knew that there was something in it - probably rohypnol, now that I think of it."

"She's not addicted."

"She said she relapsed, Vic."

"She was just saying things. She's sick and her head was sick. Vera is not an addict."

"Victoria, we can't just assume her words were a lie."

"She showed no signs of withdrawl," Victoria claimed. "She got sick, sure, but they weren't withdrawl symptoms, were they?" She couldn't remember what her high school health teacher had told her, and never thought she's need the information. "We almost always knew where she was. I don't think she'd be able to get her hands on-"

"Victoria, what was she always prescribed?" Lysander interrupted her tangent. She looked at him blankly. "When she was sick, Vic. When she was hurt. What did we put her on?"

"Painkillers," she whispered. No, that wouldn't make sense. She wouldn't take more than what was needed, right? Where would she even get more from, if she needed them. "I don't believe you, Lysander."

"Vera also looked uneasy when Atticus and I were talking about underaged drinking."

"Why would you even bring that up?" Victoria wiped the tears from her eyes. She wanted to rage. "Why would you talk about that to her in a hospital setting, if you could tell that Vera wasn't comfortable with that topic."

"Here I thought you didn't believe me-"

"I don't," the queen said firmly. "I don't." She couldn't.

Lysander hesitates before talking. Has he seen his sister like this before? Was this even worse than when Victoria found out her parents were dead? "I don't think that's what's happening here, Victoria. You... you do think she's been through this. You believe what I'm saying. You just can't believe that the worst things we experienced were thrust upon Vera when she was younger than what we were."

Victoria didn't like that her brother was right.

She sat down and stared at the floor in front of her. "I should have been there, Lysander. And I'm not talking about Vera, I'm talking about you." She paused and gulped. "I should've been there for you, especially then. I should've been the one to find you - to stop you in the first place."

Lysander rolled his chair closer to her. "Victoria it's okay-"

"I could've lost you. I could've lost another sibling. And I was so caught up with what was happening to me that I almost lost you. And I know that I can't lose Vera physically, she won't die, but I don't want to lose her again. Not in any way." She sniffed. "I just want to know how I can help her."

"Victoria, she'll be okay, okay?"

"She showed me where she did it." Victoria turned to her brother slowly. "She showed me where she stabbed herself. During the dress fitting. I never felt more broken in my life, knowing that she did that to herself. I should've been the one there for her, she shouldn't have had to be with that monster. But we never even looked for her hard enough. We couldn't find her body but we thought she was dead anyway."