More than a friend

Ch 16: Truth

XxX

RPOV

I decided to go do some grocery shopping while Christian was busy with Tatiana. It would be ridiculous to live off take-out while we here, plus I needed a distraction.
I couldn't believe he was back and with Tasha of all people. Well, that part wasn't as shocking. It was either that or return to Russia. But why? Why did he have to come back into my life? I was fine, we were fine. So why did he have to come back and mess everything up? I parked the car in the lot and sat there for a moment. I rested my head on the steering wheel and closed my eyes.

You could have tried harder to get in contact with him, I thought. I shouldn't have given up so easily. Maybe then...then what? He would have come back and played happy family with me?
Not a chance.
It could have happened if only I had managed to find him.

Urrggghhh!!
Again, I was overthinking this. Christian already sorted it out. They all believe he's her father, so what's the big deal? He'll figure it out, whispered a tiny voice in my head. He'll figure it out, and once he does, he will hate you for keeping her away from him. So will Sophie.

Tap, tap, tap.
My head snapped up, and I saw an elderly lady knocking at my window. I opened the car door and came out. "Hello Miss, would you like to buy some cookies? Only five dollars." I smiled and nodded, fishing out ten dollars out of my purse and bought two boxes of chocolate chip cookies, Christian and Sophie favorite. "Thank you."
"You're welcome," she said kindly. I was about to walk away when she spoke again, "Are you okay, sweetie?" she asked. I wanted to just deny it and go away, but there was something sincere about this lady. "No... I don't know. I'm just a little stressed, I guess," I said while running my fingers through my hair. "Everything will work out, my dear. Stressing about something won't change anything. Sometimes, you need to let things fall where they may." I tried really hard not to roll my eyes. She clearly was trying to help, but some things weren't so easy to do. Instead, I smiled, "Whatever the problem, at least I have cookies to make me feel better. Thank you again," I said, turning to go into the store.

I picked pre-cooked ribs and vegetables for the dinner, along with strawberry ice cream for dessert. The kitchen was small but decent. There is just enough room for one person to cook in. By one person, I meant Christian. I still sucked at cooking. I paid for my stuff and drove back to court.

I went through the formalities at the gate and went to park the car at the designated parking area. It was a long walk long from here to the apartment. Luckily, I only had two bags. Unfortunately, as I was walking, one of the handles ripped, so I had to balance them in my hands. Could this day get any more frustrating?
And like a frickin moth to an unlucky flame, I saw a familiar dark leather duster in the corner of my eye. I quickly sped up my pace, briskly walking towards the apartment that just came into view. I heard someone walking behind me, but I refused to turn and kept walking. Please don't be who I think it is. Please don't be who I think it is!
When I reached the door, however, I realized I couldn't get to keys in my back pocket.
"Damnit," I hissed at the door like it was its fault.
"Need some help?"

A sigh of relief escaped me as I turned around.
"Yes, please," I said to a smirking dark-haired moroi. Sophie rushed to help me with the bags while Christian opened the door. We had a quick dinner, and soon after, Sophie crawled under the blanket on the couch and fell asleep.

Christian and I were busy with the dishes when we heard a knock on the door. Christian went to answer while I finished up in the kitchen.
"I'm sorry I came so late but I couldn't wait any longer. I want the truth Christian," said Tasha at the doorway. She was alone, thank God.
"And you deserve the truth," said Christian as he let her in.
"Tasha," I greeted. She nodded, and her eyes flickered to Sophie sound asleep on the couch. "I'll carry her to the room," I said, but Christian shook his head, already reaching out to pick her up. "Don't worry, I got her."
We stood in awkward silence while Christian was in the other room. It was so unbearable that I had to speak. "So, are you still teaching marital arts?" I asked.
"Yes. It's actually growing. I'm teaching bigger classes now; it can get hectic sometimes."
"At least you have Belikov to help you out," said Christian as he entered the room. Great, so much for making things less awkward.
"He has been a huge help. His skills do come in handy," says Tasha with a tight smile at her nephew.
"And wonderfully skilled he is, but you're not here to talk about guardian Belikov, are you?" I said impatiently.
"You're right. What I want to talk about is why you didn't tell me for years that you have a child," she said to Christian. "Why did I have to find out like this when all of your friends know the truth about you. And what about Lissa? Where is she in all of this?"
"We didn't tell you because we didn't know how. So much happened that we just got lost in our own world that we didn't even stop to think about anything else," I said.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
Christian told her everything starting from Lissa and his break due to her infidelity and lack of understanding between the two. Of course, leaving out the details about our fallout because of Dimitri. Lissa and I had some differences, which caused her to choose a different guardian and Christian choosing me.
He kind of hinted that our 'love affair' began while traveling together, which resulted in our little pride and joy, which was asleep in the next room.

"What I don't get is why you just couldn't tell me this," said Tasha when he was done. "I couldn't take your disappointment if you found out things didn't work out with Lissa, and I knew how much you wanted us to be together," he said, looking away.
She held onto his arm, willing him to look at her, "I would never be upset with you because of that. I was just glad you were happy with her, and all I want is to see you happy. And if it's not with Lissa, then it's okay."
"Thank you for understanding," said Christian. "Of course."

She stood to leave, and I felt some stress leave my body. "You know, I feel so silly now. When I saw Lissa last when I came to court, I acted like you two were still together. She must have been so confused," laughed Tasha as she headed out. I remembered that day. That was the day we moved to New Jersey. It was the beginning of a new chapter for Christian and I.

"I hope things aren't bad between Lissa and you because of this."
"We spoke about it and decided to move on from that," I said with a smile.
"Why were you in court anyway?" asked Christian. "Oh, that's the day I came to official have Dimitri be made my guardian. I'm glad he finally accepted my offer, although I wasn't surprised since it was something we both wanted for the longest time. I was just glad we finally made it work," said Tasha with a far away look in her eye. A look of someone in love.
My mind froze for a second. That wasn't even a year after Dimitri left the academy.
He had gone straight to her as soon as he could. While I was sitting in that car, plagued with worry and fear, he was signing his new life with her. While I was worried and stressed about our child's future, he was on his way to another woman. The guilt I felt earlier vanished. All of it, blown away like the fucking wind on an October's night.

"Rose is something wrong?" asked Tasha. I blinked back into reality and smiled broadly. "No, nothing is wrong. I just remembered something. Something I really shouldn't forget." She looked confused, but waved goodbye and left. When she's gone Christian turned and gave me a questioning look. "Coffee?" I asked turning away from him.
"Umm, sure. Thanks."
I put the coffee machine on while Christian went into the shower. For years I've wondered what he was up to while I carried on with my life. Did he think about me? Did he ever miss me? Clearly not. Because if he had, it would be Dimitri in that shower right now instead of Christian.