Gentle Smile {Snufkin x Fem Reader}

Chapter {7} The invitation

Inside was a dusty light blue (almost grey) evening gown with intricate beading and floral embroidery that shimmered in the light from the window. Accompanying the dress was some matching heels, modest jewelry, and a corset. Just looking it makes my insides feel tight. I do not miss wearing my corset but I think I can get away with not wearing it at the ball. I put the dress and accessories back into its box before I slip the invitation into the pocket of my skirt and slipping on my shoes. 

Genevieve mentioned in the letter that all the families in the Moomin valley area are also attending. I think I would feel more at ease if I knew the Moomins were also going to be there. I have just enough time to go to visit and ask.

I decided I should go over to the Moomin's house to check. 

As I approach the Moomin's home I see a long-nosed woman in a red dress and strawberry blond hair with three children wearing matching red coats leave through the front door. I watch from a distance as they leave before I approach the front of the Moomin's house.

When I walked in the Moomin family and friends were gathered around the living room drinking tea and eating carrot cake. "Good evening everyone," I said as I closed the door behind me. I quickly scanned the room and find Snufkin was drinking a cup of tea on the couch next to Little My. He greets me with a welcoming nod and smile.

"Oh (Y/N) we have to tell you the exciting news," Snorkmaiden said sounding very excited

"Mrs. Fillijonk just came over saying that there is going to be a spring ball next week and she said everyone is invited" Little my cheered

I pull the invitation from my pocket. "Yes I just heard about it, my brother and sister-in-law will be there" I smiled

"That's exciting, maybe we will get to meet them" Said Moominmamma handing me a cup of tea

"I would be happy to formally introduce you to them" I smiled as I take a seat in the free spot on the couch between Little My and Snufkin.

"I wonder what we should wear?" Snorkmaiden questioned out loud "The ball we went to last year was a costume ball"

"Don't worry dear we have a week to find you something to wear" Moominmamma assures Snorkmaiden.

"So does this mean I don't have to dress as an alligator this time?" Sniff asked

"Of course not Sniff, this means we can come dress as ourselves," Said Moomintroll

"HA Sniff would probably be better off dressed as an alligator than himself" Little My laughted

Sniff goes to say something back at Little My but instead decides to just angrily mumble to himself before going back to eating his cake. We continued to talk about the ball for a while until I take my last bite of Moominmammas delicious carrot cake. Every bite was soft and sweet. I debated having another slice but decided it would be best to not overstay my welcome "Thank you very much for the cake Moominmamma, next time I will have to get the recipe from you" I complimented as I rise from my spot on the couch brushing my hair behind my ears. 

"Are you leaving dear?" Moominmamma asked

"I'm afraid so, I must go tend to my garden today," I said. As I was about to leave Snufkin also gets up from his seat.

"I should be on my way as well, thanks for the tea," He said placing his teacup on a nearby table.

Everyone in Moomin house says their goodbyes as we both walk through the front door closing it behind us. It felt so good out in the fresh air again and feel the warm sunlight shine down on my face. Snufkin readjusts his hat and slips his hands into his pocket before walking down the steps of the front porch. I follow close behind. 

"Everyone seems excited about the spring ball" Snufkin remarks smiling down at me. 

"Yes, they do" I giggled as we walk side by side with our shoulders lightly brushing against each other. "But I suppose you won't be attending will you?" I asked truthfully 

Snufkin lets out a slight chuckle "No, not me, I'm not too fond of large social gatherings such as a ball."

"I don't blame you, I don't enjoy them as much as I use to" I admit shyly.

"How so?" he asked.

"I can't really relate to the people I would meet at those kinds of balls," I said before turning to Snufkin as we continued to walk. I gracefully drape the back of my hand onto my head dramatically.

"My life is so hard, my diamond earrings don't match my pearl necklace, whatever shall I do?" I said sarcastically trying to do my best snobbish impression.

Snufkin lets out a surprised laugh.

"Well at least I know you don't act like that," he said still chuckling to himself.

I release a slight laugh in agreement "I'm glad you think so" I said playfully.

I love the way he laughs and his smile is so contagious. Out of everyone I've met in Moominvalley, I feel the closest to him and he makes me really happy but he feels like more than just a friend. 

'Wait do I really mean that?'

For a moment my body stops walking as I become trapped in my thoughts. I look up at the back of Snufkin's head as he continues to walk back to his tent. 

'Am I developing feelings for Snufkin?'

Snufkin looks back with his warm brown eyes to meet mine. "What's wrong (Y/N)?" he asked sounding concerned. 

I quicken my pace to catch up to him. "My apologies, I just got lost in my thoughts" 

He smiles down at me "What have I told you about apologising so much?" He says lightly ruffing up my hair.

"I may need more practice," I laugh hoping he hasn't noticed my flustered cheeks. 

We walk a few steps more until we reach the bridge next to Snufkin's tent and now we must part ways. We say our final goodbye and I start to walk into the forest back to my cottage. As I walk away I look over my shoulder to see Snufkin casting out his fishing line into the stream still smiling. I quickly walk back to my cottage trying to put as much distance as I can between Moomin house and myself. 

What should I do? This feeling is so new and exciting but should it be ignored? 

Before I knew it I was already walking through the front door of my cottage slamming it shut behind me. My heart is racing like crazy and my face feels so warm. I can't let anyone see me flustered like this. This is so unlike me. I've always taken such pride in my usually soft, sophisticated, and calm demeanour that this side of me feels unnatural. 

I begin to nervously pace around the cottage as a million questions flood my head. 

Do Snufkins feelings match mine or am I reading his actons towards me incorrectly? My nerves start to calm down as I take a seat at the coffee table where I had left the lilacs Snufkin gave me. Just a few moments ago I was feeling so overwhelmed but when I look at the lilacs I feel peaceful. I close my eyes and take a deep breath as my heart rate starts to slow down. I continue to breathe in the sweet smell of the flowers and listen to the wind blowing the trees outside my window.

What will my family think? I wish I had someone to tell me what to do with these feelings. I use to live my life being told what to do, what to say, and even how to feel. I have a new life here in Moominvalley where I am in control of my life and can now be truly free but why do I still feel trapped? 

I can't be like this anymore.

I lean back into my chair with my eyes still fixated on the flowers sitting in front of me.

I will need to think long and hard about how I feel towards Snufkin but when I do decide I'll know it was truly my choice. 

 I don't have to apologise for having human emotions anymore.